Uneffinbelievable!!!

[bwood]

i guess i can post this now that it didnt make the paper and
no one has knocked on my door...

the other night, i left my place on foot and walked
over to one of the best bar/restaurants in my area...

had a delightful meal, chatted up some hotties and left
to go home with some phone numbers and the memory of some
sweet ass rubbed up against me...

as i was walking, i passed along adjacent to a huge parking lot
and walked beside this huge suv...

i was being careful as, thanks to the shitheads at the aclu, all the worthless sacks of dogshit have more rights than me...

i heard some grunting and stopped and crouched down shielded
by a wheel and cautiously peered around the front of the vehicle...

i suspected that someone was breaking into a car or something
so i got my spray out and mentally prepared to effect a "citizens arrest"...

bros, you will not believe it!!!

a grown man was shitting in the parking lot with his pants around his ankles!!!

i couldnt believe it, it wasnt that late and parents and children
were still around as the restaurant part of the bar caters to families...

i got so fuckin mad, i waited until he started to wipe (HE FUCKIN HAD TOILET PAPER WITH HIM!) and kicked him in the ass so hard that my ankle still hurts...

he sprawled forward on his face and then i doused his
ass crack area with some oc/cs and quickly departed...

fucker starts howling like a dog hit by a car...

what the fuck is this country coming too???

i know this is acceptable behavior in san francisco
and other liberal strongholds, but here???

wtf??? stupid fucker couldnt walk 50 feet to a goddamn
public bathroom???

who the fuck wants to see that or step in it???

 

[duritz]

why do you carry mace??? aren't u a dude?? funny story though. did he realize what had happened??

 

[bwood]

because i have had ass beatings that didnt
hurt as much as freeze +p does...

and i dont fight, i win...

nobody wins in a fight...

 

[hardrock]

Was he howling from the kick or the anus full of mace?

That shit has got to hurt!

 

[bwood]

couldnt tell ya hardrock...

i am walking with a limp still...

shouldve just dosed him up on both ends
and saved myself the pain...

 

[KO-KAYNE]

LOL.......THATS GREAT.

 

[CipherLock]

Was he an ordinary every day kind of guy (asides from the public loaf pinching?) or a street person?

I was just wondering because the other day my buddy told his girlfriend that he didn't love her any more and thought that it was time they went their seperate ways. They have been living together for about 2 years and he was ready to move on.

Anyway over the last week Mike had been getting his stuff out of the apartment and into his parents place for a swing move when his ex Cindy convinced him to talk about it over a nice home cooked dinner.

They talk, eat, drink, have dessert, sex... (his bad) and tells her that he still thinks they should move on. She collects herself and tells him that is fine.

Mike thought it was a bit odd but decided to get out then before she blew up. He throws on his jeans and shirt and heads for the door.

She follows and as he is about 12 feet from the door into the hallway of the complex she throws some toilette paper at him jingles his keys at him like a taunt then slams the door shut.

He has no keys and no idea why she threw tp at him. Then he feels the 'move'.

5 minutes later with no one answering his desperate pleas for some mercy he finds a nice large SUV in the parking lot for cover and goes for broke, only as soon as he is done some ass sprays him with pepper spray and quickly sticks a finger in Mike's poor ass.

When he recovered all he found was a peice of paper with BWOOD - 444-3932 (call me)


weird....

 

[HULKSTER]

i guess i can post this now that it didnt make the paper and
no one has knocked on my door...

the other night, i left my place on foot and walked
over to one of the best bar/restaurants in my area...

had a delightful meal, chatted up some hotties and left
to go home with some phone numbers and the memory of some
sweet ass rubbed up against me...

as i was walking, i passed along adjacent to a huge parking lot
and walked beside this huge suv...

i was being careful as, thanks to the shitheads at the aclu, all the worthless sacks of dogshit have more rights than me...

i heard some grunting and stopped and crouched down shielded
by a wheel and cautiously peered around the front of the vehicle...

i suspected that someone was breaking into a car or something
so i got my spray out and mentally prepared to effect a "citizens arrest"...

bros, you will not believe it!!!

a grown man was shitting in the parking lot with his pants around his ankles!!!

i couldnt believe it, it wasnt that late and parents and children
were still around as the restaurant part of the bar caters to families...

i got so fuckin mad, i waited until he started to wipe (HE FUCKIN HAD TOILET PAPER WITH HIM!) and kicked him in the ass so hard that my ankle still hurts...

he sprawled forward on his face and then i doused his
ass crack area with some oc/cs and quickly departed...

fucker starts howling like a dog hit by a car...

what the fuck is this country coming too???

i know this is acceptable behavior in san francisco
and other liberal strongholds, but here???

wtf??? stupid fucker couldnt walk 50 feet to a goddamn
public bathroom???

who the fuck wants to see that or step in it???

LMAO!!! That was fuckin' great.....although I will admit, bwood, that I have urinated in public numerous times. However, this is usually during the winter while I'm out jogging, and there are absolutely no public toilets around. When it's freezing cold outside, and you have even a drop of urine in your bladder, your body makes any and all efforts for you to piss it out of your system immediately. But I did hide behind bushes and the such, and I sure as hell don't do it in public VIEW. I usually look around as I'm doing it, just making sure a cop doens't catch me. But shitting in public, in a fucking parking lot? That motherfucker couldn't find a toilet? Didn't he have a car that he could drive to go someplace with a public toilet?

And the jerkoff had toilet paper with him.......that's the best part.

 

[Frackal]

Fuck you buddy! I have a forensic print of your shoe taken off my left asscheek! You're about to be the victim of a raid!

 

[HULKSTER]

Hey Frack,

I registered at Chemical Muscle. But whenever I try to post, it won't let me. I guess my account has yet to be activated. Or maybe Citruscide saved everybody the trouble and banned my ISP! LOL J/K

 

[plornive]

i got so fuckin mad, i waited until he started to wipe (HE FUCKIN HAD TOILET PAPER WITH HIM!) and kicked him in the ass so hard that my ankle still hurts...

That was funny as shit (no pun intended)... did you get shit on your foot when you kicked his ass? I would have been worried about that...

 

[Baoh]

Man.

It could only have been better if you had cut him up at least a little bit.

Good job, though.

 

[HansNZ]

bros, you will not believe it!!!

a grown man was shitting in the parking lot with his pants around his ankles!!!

i couldnt believe it, it wasnt that late and parents and children
were still around as the restaurant part of the bar caters to families...

i got so fuckin mad, i waited until he started to wipe (HE FUCKIN HAD TOILET PAPER WITH HIM!) and kicked him in the ass so hard that my ankle still hurts...

he sprawled forward on his face and then i doused his
ass crack area with some oc/cs and quickly departed...

That guy was disgusting, that is truely unacceptable behaviour.

However you did something worse. Instead of a mature response, you committed assault.

That comes as no surprise because your equally as antisocial behaviour seems quite in keeping with your aggressive, nasty, vindictive and militant personality.

 

[Lumberg]

interesting story.......

I guess you want to do something but at the same tiem you don't want to confront somebody that you just watched take a shit.....wait a minute....you sat there and waited for him to finish? that's fucked up dude.

 

[skaman607]

Re: Re: Uneffinbelievable!!!

That guy was disgusting, that is truely unacceptable behaviour.

However you did something worse. Instead of a mature response, you committed assault.

That comes as no surprise because your equally as antisocial behaviour seems quite in keeping with your aggressive, nasty, vindictive and militant personality.

So what should he have done?

 

[Frackal]

Hey Frack,

I registered at Chemical Muscle. But whenever I try to post, it won't let me. I guess my account has yet to be activated. Or maybe Citruscide saved everybody the trouble and banned my ISP! LOL J/K

Did you activate your account through your email address?

 

[biteme]

i guess i can post this now that it didnt make the paper and
no one has knocked on my door...

the other night, i left my place on foot and walked
over to one of the best bar/restaurants in my area...

had a delightful meal, chatted up some hotties and left
to go home with some phone numbers and the memory of some
sweet ass rubbed up against me...

as i was walking, i passed along adjacent to a huge parking lot
and walked beside this huge suv...

i was being careful as, thanks to the shitheads at the aclu, all the worthless sacks of dogshit have more rights than me...

i heard some grunting and stopped and crouched down shielded
by a wheel and cautiously peered around the front of the vehicle...

i suspected that someone was breaking into a car or something
so i got my spray out and mentally prepared to effect a "citizens arrest"...

bros, you will not believe it!!!

a grown man was shitting in the parking lot with his pants around his ankles!!!

i couldnt believe it, it wasnt that late and parents and children
were still around as the restaurant part of the bar caters to families...

i got so fuckin mad, i waited until he started to wipe (HE FUCKIN HAD TOILET PAPER WITH HIM!) and kicked him in the ass so hard that my ankle still hurts...

he sprawled forward on his face and then i doused his
ass crack area with some oc/cs and quickly departed...

fucker starts howling like a dog hit by a car...

what the fuck is this country coming too???

i know this is acceptable behavior in san francisco
and other liberal strongholds, but here???

wtf??? stupid fucker couldnt walk 50 feet to a goddamn
public bathroom???

who the fuck wants to see that or step in it???

You had no right to do that. You're lucky you didn't get shot. Why didn't you take the time to ask him why he was shitting in the middle of a parking lot. Maybe it was an emergency?

 

[bwood]

Re: Re: Uneffinbelievable!!!

That guy was disgusting, that is truely unacceptable behaviour.

However you did something worse. Instead of a mature response, you committed assault.

That comes as no surprise because your equally as antisocial behaviour seems quite in keeping with your aggressive, nasty, vindictive and militant personality.

yawn...

oh yeah, dballer said hello...

no wait, that was addressed to someone else...

but i can only imagine what a "mature" response
would have been to such as you...

admit it, your left cheek still stings and the spray
put you off your "game"...

next time walk 50 feet to the public crapper, it
aint like you've never beeen in one before...

 

[AAP]

OUCH!

 

[AustinTX]

Re: Re: Uneffinbelievable!!!

You had no right to do that. You're lucky you didn't get shot. Why didn't you take the time to ask him why he was shitting in the middle of a parking lot. Maybe it was an emergency?

Yeah, I always carry a roll of TP with me in case I need to take an emergency dump in a parking lot.