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courtesy of thickmass on another board...
The Night Before Christmas
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T'was the night before Christmas and all through the gym,
not a member was benching, not even old Slim.
The ampules were hung by the lockers with care,
in hopes that St. Anabolic would soon fill them there.
The guys were all resting against the hack squat sled,
while visions of dianabol danced in their heads.
My old lady in spandex and me in my cap,
had just settled in for the eveningtime crap.
When out in the parking lot there arose such a clatter,
I squeezed out two turds to go see what's the matter.
When what in my wondering eyes should appear,
but a giant sleigh and eight juiced up reindeer!
With a gigantic driver so massive and thick,
I knew in a moment - it must be St. Anabolic!
More rapid than eagles the reindeer then came,
he whistled and shouted and called them by name.
On deca, on dbol, on test and fina,
on eq and primo, on clomid and winny.
To the top of the porch, to the top of the wall,
now dash away dash away dash away all!
Like dry skin before the sustanon flies,
when your balls shut down, clomid brings them on line.
To the top of the housetop the reindeer they flew,
with a sleigh full of gear; and St Anabolic too.
And then in a twingling, I heard on the roof ,
the banging and smacking of each massive hoof.
As I pulled up my pants and was turing around,
St. Anabolic came in the and threw the door down.
He was dressed all in rayon from his foot to his head,
and his clothes were all dirty from his crapped out old sled.
A bundle of gear he had thrown on his back,
he looked like Coleman just starting his stack.
His eyes were all bloodshot, his pimples how merry,
his cheeks were all puffy and his nose like a cherry.
His gapped teeth were lined up all in a row,
and his forehead and elbows had started to grow
The stump of a blunt he held tight in his teeth,
the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a moon face and a d-bol belly,
that shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.
He was massive and thick, like a bloated up elf,
and I laughed when I saw him in spite of myself.
With a wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
soon he gave me to know that there won't be no feds
He spoke not a word but went straight to his work,
and filled all the ampules and turned with a jerk
Laying a finger aside of his nose,
he shot a snot rocket on my new christmas clothes!
He sprang to his sleigh and to his team gave a whistle,
and I saw him take a handfull of milk thistle.
But I heard him yell as he rode out of sight,
"Happy Juicing to all - and to all a good night!"
The Night Before Christmas
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
T'was the night before Christmas and all through the gym,
not a member was benching, not even old Slim.
The ampules were hung by the lockers with care,
in hopes that St. Anabolic would soon fill them there.
The guys were all resting against the hack squat sled,
while visions of dianabol danced in their heads.
My old lady in spandex and me in my cap,
had just settled in for the eveningtime crap.
When out in the parking lot there arose such a clatter,
I squeezed out two turds to go see what's the matter.
When what in my wondering eyes should appear,
but a giant sleigh and eight juiced up reindeer!
With a gigantic driver so massive and thick,
I knew in a moment - it must be St. Anabolic!
More rapid than eagles the reindeer then came,
he whistled and shouted and called them by name.
On deca, on dbol, on test and fina,
on eq and primo, on clomid and winny.
To the top of the porch, to the top of the wall,
now dash away dash away dash away all!
Like dry skin before the sustanon flies,
when your balls shut down, clomid brings them on line.
To the top of the housetop the reindeer they flew,
with a sleigh full of gear; and St Anabolic too.
And then in a twingling, I heard on the roof ,
the banging and smacking of each massive hoof.
As I pulled up my pants and was turing around,
St. Anabolic came in the and threw the door down.
He was dressed all in rayon from his foot to his head,
and his clothes were all dirty from his crapped out old sled.
A bundle of gear he had thrown on his back,
he looked like Coleman just starting his stack.
His eyes were all bloodshot, his pimples how merry,
his cheeks were all puffy and his nose like a cherry.
His gapped teeth were lined up all in a row,
and his forehead and elbows had started to grow
The stump of a blunt he held tight in his teeth,
the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a moon face and a d-bol belly,
that shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.
He was massive and thick, like a bloated up elf,
and I laughed when I saw him in spite of myself.
With a wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
soon he gave me to know that there won't be no feds
He spoke not a word but went straight to his work,
and filled all the ampules and turned with a jerk
Laying a finger aside of his nose,
he shot a snot rocket on my new christmas clothes!
He sprang to his sleigh and to his team gave a whistle,
and I saw him take a handfull of milk thistle.
But I heard him yell as he rode out of sight,
"Happy Juicing to all - and to all a good night!"
