Bros, I don't know where to begin. My life is so fucked up right now
I've got no idea what to do or where to turn.
I'm in a 2 year relationship with a girl that I love but know we can't
be together. We have a 9 month old daughter who I love more than
anything in the world. She is the only thing that keeps me going every
day.
She has been physically abusive ever since we met but I didn't think
anything of it because she couldn't hurt me and it was almost a joke.
Finally I told her that the shit would only escalate so that anymore
physical abuse and I was calling the cops. I did, three times and
things got so bad that I ended up cheating on her when she was pregnant
partially because I was out late at night doing what I had to do to pay
the bills because we were barely getting by. When I did come home, it
was hell so eventually, this other girl and I that was friends with
took it further.
When we had finally seperated, she found out that I'd been cheating on
her and we were not on speaking terms of a month or two. Once she had
the baby, we gradually spent more and more time together because we
both wanted things to work out and we loved each other.
I always took accountability for what I did and know that it was wrong.
I've apologized time and time again, but I cant change the past.
We are trying to work things out but she cannot get over what happened
and no matther what she does, breaking things, hitting me, anything,
she always justifies it by the fact that I cheated on her. the worst
part is, she uses the fact that if she yells loud enough and kicks
enough doors, I won't do a thing because I wont let my daughter see me
act violently and being quiet is the only way she will calm down
without me slapping the makeup off her face.
I've never laid a hand on her and she knows I wont. But I wont take
this kind of enviornment for my daughter to live in.
I dont know what to do. Do I just leave her? If so, that would mean
leaving my daughter which I could never do. I wont let anyone hurt
that angel.
But I cant keep living with my hands tied and let her exploit the fact that I wont hit her back and I will not let our daughter see violence.
You dont know how hard it has been not to show her her what getting physical can really mean. But I've always had the presence of mind to keep my cool no matter what the circumstances. I'm not going to jail for any girl, no matter how crazy.
I cant be the first one in totally fucked up relationship like this. At least I hope not.
What the fuck do I do to unfuck my life for myself and my daughter?
Thanks in advance of any advice whatsoever.
I've got no idea what to do or where to turn.
I'm in a 2 year relationship with a girl that I love but know we can't
be together. We have a 9 month old daughter who I love more than
anything in the world. She is the only thing that keeps me going every
day.
She has been physically abusive ever since we met but I didn't think
anything of it because she couldn't hurt me and it was almost a joke.
Finally I told her that the shit would only escalate so that anymore
physical abuse and I was calling the cops. I did, three times and
things got so bad that I ended up cheating on her when she was pregnant
partially because I was out late at night doing what I had to do to pay
the bills because we were barely getting by. When I did come home, it
was hell so eventually, this other girl and I that was friends with
took it further.
When we had finally seperated, she found out that I'd been cheating on
her and we were not on speaking terms of a month or two. Once she had
the baby, we gradually spent more and more time together because we
both wanted things to work out and we loved each other.
I always took accountability for what I did and know that it was wrong.
I've apologized time and time again, but I cant change the past.
We are trying to work things out but she cannot get over what happened
and no matther what she does, breaking things, hitting me, anything,
she always justifies it by the fact that I cheated on her. the worst
part is, she uses the fact that if she yells loud enough and kicks
enough doors, I won't do a thing because I wont let my daughter see me
act violently and being quiet is the only way she will calm down
without me slapping the makeup off her face.
I've never laid a hand on her and she knows I wont. But I wont take
this kind of enviornment for my daughter to live in.
I dont know what to do. Do I just leave her? If so, that would mean
leaving my daughter which I could never do. I wont let anyone hurt
that angel.
But I cant keep living with my hands tied and let her exploit the fact that I wont hit her back and I will not let our daughter see violence.
You dont know how hard it has been not to show her her what getting physical can really mean. But I've always had the presence of mind to keep my cool no matter what the circumstances. I'm not going to jail for any girl, no matter how crazy.
I cant be the first one in totally fucked up relationship like this. At least I hope not.
What the fuck do I do to unfuck my life for myself and my daughter?
Thanks in advance of any advice whatsoever.