this bigorexia/muscle dismorphia thing sucks....

[needsize]

I was having a bad day, sitting here staring at my quads thinking that I had done something wrong alone the way, and that my legs were way too small and there were going to get me smoked in my show. I even looked at them in a few different mirrors to see if they really looked like the toothpicks I thought they were. Then fyre sends me the pics that she took when we were working on my posing this week, and I'm still wondering if someone photoshopped them, cuz this isnt how they looked in the mirror.
Why is it you can get medication for every other disorder but this one????

 

[MissChris]

You look wonderful hon, and you are going to do a spectacular job in competing. I know it's not easy to swallow (I still have battles with a similar self-perception problem, except opposite principle ), but take it from an objective third party with a good eye for symmetry and aesthetics: you're doing great. Everyone can improve, sure, but you've done a hell of a job. Just thought ya might need to hear it.

 

[needsize]

You look wonderful hon, and you are going to do a spectacular job in competing. I know it's not easy to swallow (I still have battles with a similar self-perception problem, except opposite principle ), but take it from an objective third party with a good eye for symmetry and aesthetics: you're doing great. Everyone can improve, sure, but you've done a hell of a job. Just thought ya might need to hear it.

thanks, sometimes it amazes me though just how far off our perceptions of ourselves can be...I'll go back to feeling tiny once I leave the computer...

 

[bigguns15]

You look really awesome in your picture. It's hard when you see yourself everyday to notice changes. But, those changes are cumulative and before you know it, you're bigger. I go through the same thing with pwr_machine. He always thinks he is too small, when in reality, he's growing all the time.

 

[revexrevex]

diet definetely working

 

[louden_swain]

Hang in there NS,

You have good balance in your physique and thats important!!

I actually think your quads and chest look better in these photos. I am really impressed with your lean and trim waist.

Something tells me you will perform well in this show.

What is your current bodyweight?

 

[Mike_Rojas]

Looking big and cut... serratus and abs very visible. Thighs are huge bro

 

[sinjinsmythe33]

you look ready. dont give it another thought.

 

[ZGzaZ]

needsize, you are looking amazing man, it's hard to believe that you would even doubt that. The diet is working wonders, youre looking very cut, and very huge...you will do great!

 

[Deleted member 33117]

::sigh:: I know how you feel bro. I almost always see tiny muscle and rolls of lard when I look in the mirror. Its part of being a bodybuilder I suppose. Why would anyone who has a great self image bust their ass in the gym day in and day out, eat this rediculous diets and pump themselves full of drugs in an effort to improve how they look? Learn to use it to your advantage. Still it does suck that most of us rarely get to see the fruits of our labor.

 

[cheesecake]

Man, you look awesome. How far are you out from the contest now?
...chad...

 

[needsize]

Thanks again guys. Bodyweight was 216lbs last time I weighed in, sitting somewhere between 8-9%, my next bf test is on monday. I actually saw veins in my quads and calves this week, that was pretty cool....
I just wish this is what I saw every time I looked at myself, but you know how it is....Maybe someday I'll be big enough that I'll feel big all the time....

 

[Tiervexx]

Muscle dismorphia has been tormenting me for the last year and a half so I can sympathies.

You just have to trust us when we tell you look amazing!

 

[PolishHammer1977]

Monstar

 

[Deleted member 33117]

Needsize, ok that's messed up, you got nice abes and are just now seeing viens on your calves and quads. I'm the total opposite. I can be bloated from test, and have love handles and everything and still have viens all over my calves, and a couple small one's criss-crossing my quads. Guess we all carry out bf differently though. I catch hell sometimes, though I think they are jelous, about having a pretty lean lowerbody year round, even when I'm not cut.

Don't worry man, you're huge. Even if you can't see it.

 

[Serea]

You look great.

Sometimes I'll look in the mirror thinking my arms look tiny. Then other times they'll look huge and I'll go whoa! It's weird how we perceive ourselves.

 

[Peckz]

what the hell? Your quads are kickass.

 

[coolcolj]

well anytime you lean up, people tend to feel small, it's only natural. Technically you are, the fat is shrinking away

But the muscle is still there.

You have leaned up quite a lot since the last pics you posted.
Still looking full, don't sweat it.

 

[Zander1983]

The mirror is an enemy, without a doubt. When I see pictures or videos I'm always amazed at how much leaner I look compared to how I perceive myself to look when I'm looking in the mirror.

Mate, you're looking in fine shape. Leaned up significantly since you started your diet, and your size has only been emphasised as a result.

 

[circusgirl]

Looking good!

Something that might help - one of the things a friend of mine had to do when she was inpatient for the opposite from "muscle dysmorphia", anorexia (obviously she had a HUGE problem, but this helps me with my body image too) - Look at yourself in the mirror and try to force yourself to see the image rather than your perception of it. Imagine that the person there is not you, but someone in the locker room in the gym, assess the body you see objectively.

Photos are good for this as the camera looks at all angles equally - when we look at something with the naked eye we tend to have our gaze drawn to certain points, usually with ourselves to what we perceive as our weak points, and we see something totally different from what is actually there (this is why group photos often lack focus, because when you look at a group of people, you find a focus, but the camera doesn't necessarily)..

Take that photo you posted and force yourself to see the similarities between it and your reflection in the mirror.

 

[phatman42]

What's with the skinny wheels man??

hehe

FFS those are BEASTLY!! They are actually scary to look at!! Don't worry... you're looking fantastic!!

 

[needsize]

thanks again guys. My training partner and I took some shots at the gym today while pumped up, and even with the aweful lighting, I feel much better..its amazing how much different you can look with a pump

 

[JollyRogers]

Dude are you crazy...your jacked

 

[Mr. Sexy Man]

i bet if you shocked your calves and worked them everyday they would grow.

the only thing i see lacking is you dont have any hip flexors or the middle quad development, you just have the outter and inner developed from squats and presses.

try doing some roundhouse kicks on a back, or some high knee drills, or a few sprints to bring out the middle part.

you look awesome man