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So....

WODIN

बुद्धकर&
Platinum
I'm talking to my wife and we have this conversations.....

Swear to God!!!

Me: I tell you in my next life I am coming back as a Blue Whale!
her: Don't you want to be a Dolphin?
Me: Nope, A Blue Whale!
Her: Why a Blue Whale, Dolphins can go between dimensions, don't you want to do that?
Me: Nope, I want to be a Blue Whale?
Her: Why?
Me: They have 20 foot dicks! I want a 20 foot dick!
Her: No way am I dealing with that!
Me: Don't worry you get a 30 foot vigina.
Her: Damn!
Me: Well the babies going to weigh 200 pounds at birth dear.
her: Even so, you could get lost in someplace like that.
Me: Bust out laughing.
Her: I still want to be a Dolphin!
 
god it must be fun to be senile, im suprised you managed to keep a conversation that long without loosing track.
 
We have these types of talks all the time. Were completely trancluscent and capable of keeping track of the topic or subject matter.

MM - Your skinny! LMAO!!!
 
Seems like you and your wife are very boring people. A conversation with a chair would be more interesting then with you and your wife.
 
I'm confused... she didn't orginally state that she wanted to be a dolphin, she stated that she wanted you to be a dolphin; then, at the end of the conversation, she says she "still" wants to be a dolphin.

Also, why would the vagina be deeper by 10' than the whale's dick?

There is no wife, is there?
 
There is too a wife and she wants to come back as a Dolphin damnit!
 
pushing_fe said:
I'm a little confused on the multidimensional travel thing. Can you elaborate on this?

My wife is into the new age stuff where Dolphins can travel iin multiple dimensions.
 
WODIN said:


My wife is into the new age stuff where Dolphins can travel iin multiple dimensions.

Visual on WODIN's wife living in the Land Of The Amish. Crystals and incense with Shaker furniture and quilting bees.

The New Age Green Acres
 
Originally posted by FreeballinDC
Visual on WODIN's wife living in the Land Of The Amish. Crystals and incense with Shaker furniture and quilting bees.
The New Age Green Acres

While WODIN is off at a Barn Raising
 
WODIN said:


My wife is into the new age stuff where Dolphins can travel iin multiple dimensions.

translation:
"years of drug use have made her nuttier than my shits"

my step mom was like this. crystals could heal all, she could levitate, walk through walls, teleport, and was psychic... but never if non-believers were around.
rough life.

she also believed that much of what we don't understand lies in teh 4th dimension - I had a good argument for this, but those never worked on her b/c she then just claimed I was brainwashed...
she couldn't cook either.
 
Originally posted by HappyScrappy
"years of drug use have made her nuttier than my shits"

You should Chew your food each mouthful 30 times...
That should solve your chunk problems.
 
also, that wasn't intended to be a slam against Wodin's woman - just a swing (and likely miss) at the humor curveball and a chance to talk about my insane ex step mom.
she also though she could turn things into other objects - she frequently wanted to turn them into bananas... which you can't blame her - they are cute, they are easy to carry, have that nice cover, and taste good too
 
The odd thing is my wife has never taken any hard drugs of any kind. She drinks a little and takes the occasional bong hit, but thats it.

MY KIDS ARE DOING FINE!!!!
 
WODIN said:
The odd thing is my wife has never taken any hard drugs of any kind. She drinks a little and takes the occasional bong hit, but thats it.

MY KIDS ARE DOING FINE!!!!


then stop beating her
 
I have never beaten my wife! I have accidentally run in her once or twice and she has gone boom on her bum, butt that is it!!
 
Now there is a woman who can appreciate a BLUE WHALE!!!

ANYTIME Vix.!!!
 
Ok, here's the solution (assuming that there really IS a wife and kids -- not just figments of bad jello attacking your age-addled mind at the nursing home); tell her that she can be a dolphin and you can still be a blue whale, BUT, you're going to be a female blue whale and then she must swim into your 30' deep mangina and wiggle rhythmically... Pretty good solution don't you think?

Either that, or just tell her blue whales have the ability to travel not only into other dimensions, but backwards or forwards in time... well documented. Tell her you learned that on Costeau...

Or just suck it up and become a dolphin, you likely wouldn't make it without her anyway.

(just watch out for the tuna boats)


Happy Scrappy, your insane ex-stepmom was right. One day your aura will shift and you will see the light.
 
See I would much rather take my chances with Japanese whalers and hang out off the Alaskan coast than try and deal with Tuna boats. Dolphin Safe MY ASS!!!

I mean that as in a scouf, a nod to the ridiculous nature of the claim, not that I want a dolphin in my ass.

My Aura varies according to the drugs in my body.
 
she used to tell me that I had an excellent aura.
she liked me even though I thought it was obvious that I couldn't stand her.

she didn't get my explanation of how things look in different dimensions, so if there were objects in the 4th dimension, we would still see artifacts of them.

she would read things and then misinterpret (sp?) them and that was how she came to the conclusion that she could teleport.
 
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