After three meals of Combusting Magnesium... the wind turned foul. I let go a gail of flatus so savage that even I said "Good Dog, Man, didst something secret itself amongst thine nethers and die?"
When you let go a real retina-creaser, don't you just hate when the really gruesome Melvina Van Hunchenhairlipp happens to come into your office?
I mean: the Chernobyl Salsa Cloud was in full bloom and she walked face first into her doom. The horror? Not that I crisped the ample nose hair farm on Mrs. Elevenfootpolemarks, no, not at all, but rather that she STAYED AT GROUND ZERO ON PURPOSE!¨She was reeling in an almost pre-orgasmic euphoria as she tippled her huge wodinload around my desk to check a stats poster I have up on the wall.
Even Mary Vonvondervest pales in his gag inducing smarminess next to someone who would lustfully swim in the thick, dank, musty realm of my whey isolate and habenero/fishballs laced stench.
She's fired.