Protein Bombs

[Lumberg]

Damn I got them so bad right now. I must drop like 20 an hour or something. A coworker of mine came by my office and he totally smelled it. I should say something, make a crack or something but it's more of a professional relationship. He totally crinkled up his face.

So what do the people on here do when the fetid stink of fermented protein is escaping out your ass at an alarming degree?

Holding them in is out of the question.

JC

 

[Willyumyum]

Ginger root does help... I don't know if this has any relation or if it's just a head thing but since i've been on ALA @ about 1200mg day my fart stench and frequency has almost gone away completely... I take ginger root with any high protein meal and ALA throughout the day..... I dont know if the ALA has anything to do with the less farting though...

YUM

 

[Enigmaxxx7]

i've been burning incense in my office. it covers the smell of the farts.

 

[Swoleyoley]

i just let the rip and the loser that sits behind me deal with it

 

[johnboy]

what kind of protein are you taking ?

Its Not a muscle tech product is it ? That shit is bunk

I would switch to isopure it is much easier on the stomach and doesn't have the lactose of other proteins. There is a product out on the market now that helps this but I can't remember the name, I will have to look in my last muscle media, that's where I saw it.

 

[Lumberg]

I use unflavored whey from supplement direct. You know, I'm not even sure it's from that because I stopped using it for three weeks and I still was dropping bombs like I was in Afghanistan. I was making shakes out of powdered skim milk and soy milk powder though. I wonder if it has to do with powders of any kind.

The incense idea is a good one, bro, but I visit my coworkers' offices a lot too.

JC

 

[JG1]

How much ginger root per meal?

 

[arnieguns]

I like when everyone cringes from the stink bombs I let go. Just had a protein drink and a yogurt and cannot wait to let rip in the weightroom.

 

[RussianBro]

totally ginger

Bro, they are cheap. They are good... I had the same problem. I learned something very important... Compadres don't let you die here. I work at the bank. I still remember that horror of poisoning my customers who trust me their greens. Ginger works. No more stinky bank work invironment.
Peace out...

 

[jbauer]

Im glad you finally asked!!!!!

 

[Lumberg]

That's right. Now go buy me some ginger.

 

[German]

Too much air swallowed can cause farting

I used to be a big farter. Some day I simply had enough and looked for professional advise. Here is the result:

We swallow about 2-3 liters of air every day together with food and beverages. Eating fast, not chewing well and eating and drinking things that contain too much gas or air (coke, sprite, etc., fresh bread, ...) increase the amount of air/gas swallowed.
A part of the gas leaves the body through the mouth (belching), but the bigger part passes through the guts and causes farts.

Shakes are full of air as the process mixes air with liquid !!!

This advise seems ridiculous, but it is not. First it comes from a specialist and second it helped me get my farts under control.

Of course there are other causes for farts like certain food or food combinations. I, for example, can't stand milk with oat products, couliflower, broccoli, field mushroom, onions.
But this is individual.

Today I do my protein drinks just using whey protein, water and a spoon to mix it carefully.

The German

 

[Evik]

USE NITROTECH!!!!!!!!

 

[thefreshman]

Kinda related, I'm getting ready to order some protein from kilosports.com. I should get the isolate as opposed to the concentrate, yes? Also is this shit flavored?? Link if interested: https://ssl-000.9netave.com/~ux15f112/cgi-bin/secure/WheyProteinIsolate.html

I think its natural flavored, whatever the hell that is. Any other recommendations?

 

[the nature boy]

are you lactose intolerant?

 

[Stan Ozolol]

this thread is great .... there's nothing like a protein fart to impress your friends, family , or coworkers with!

 

[mvmaxx]

for those that bought ginger from kilosports.com - how do you measure out 500mg?? I received the tub with no scoop or measurement information.

I called them and no answer. I'll try back again unless one of you bros can tell me what it is.

 

[TraxZBT]

my farts ended once I spaced my meals every 2-3 hours at 50 gram intervals. I guess it has something to do with timing.

 

[Lumberg]

I'm gonna respond to a few posts here:

I am not lactose intolerant, as far as I know.

I know about the swallowing air thing, and I do notice that my shakes get all foamy when I make them--I use a little hand blender. And I like bananas and peanut butter in my shakes so not sure how you can blend bananas and PB with a spoon. Maybe mix the shake and let it sit for 15 minutes in the fridge to let the air bubbles escape? I'll try that.

As far as ordering whey protein concentrate vs. isolate, I find that the isolate is a rip off in all cases. Concentrate is like 80% protein and isolate is like 90-95%, but it's way more than 9/8 of the price. Natural means it's not flavored so it tastes like very bland milk, like almost sour. For concentrate I recommend supplementdirect.com. You can get an 11-pound bag for like $42. Also there are some protein concentrate manufacturers where you can get whey and casein for ridiculous prices like $3 a pound if you're willing to order like 55 lbs. Supplementdirect recommends adding Powdered sugar free drink or Jello mixes to flavor it. I find a banana works fine.


Thanks for the advice, and I wouldn't mind knowing the answer to that ginger question.

JC

 

[xonic2xonic]

Farting sucks. It pisses me off that the worst time seems to be during my workouts. It is not good for flirting with chicks. The other time is at home with a woman

Has anyone tried any of these anti-gas products?

 

[supertech69]

my farts ended once I spaced my meals every 2-3 hours at 50 gram intervals. I guess it has something to do with timing.

That would make it a "time" bomb! LOL sorry, just a stupid joke

 

[supertech69]

check this out

I heard about this on Bob & Tom. It's really supposed to work. If anyone tries it lets all know.


http://www.flatulence-filter.com/

 

[Lumberg]

I was thinking about sticking a dryer sheet up my ass and going around like that......but this is much better!


me -> <-coworker leaving my office

JC

 

[muscle_geek]

That's some funny shit Crane!

 

[MaCPiMP1n]

How much ginger root per meal?

500mg b4 a meal or protein shake

 

[MaCPiMP1n]

using whey isolate some what alleviated my gas problems compared to using whey protein blends...

 

[Lumberg]

Hey guys I think I have figured out what was causing the eruptions out of my ass:

peanut butter.

Yes I have noticed that on days after I had PB with my shakes my ass was like Mt. Vesuvius.

How that I have discontinued PB the volcanic activity in the vecinity of my ass has subsided to just occasional rumblings.

I don't know if it is peanut butter per se or peanut butter mixed up with protein powder.

I would like input from those who put flax oil in their shakes to see if that has a similar effect.

My doctor also said that different people rect dofferently to diff. foods so this may be an individual thing.

I am thinking about grinding up flax seeds for my shakes in the future. (for EFAs)

I'm out,

JC

 

[manny78]

Ovol 180 mg will stop the farts right on the stop.

 

[Steel Adams]

Protein Bombs are the worst. I was this stuff called Beano. It works great and you can get it from the grocery store. I also try to eat very slowly and frequently throughout the day. Hope this helps. Word of advice never play turlt with your girl!!!!!! No sex for a month!
Steel

 

[FreakMonster]

Reminds me of the classic Assface post. Here is it for your enjoyment!!


OK, OK, ASSFACE understands we all have the same things we hate at the gym , mattskywalker said it best - until one of us opens a gym and only board members go, we have to deal with it. ASSFACE says we can also deal with it, but we dont have to deal with it sitting down!!. THIS IS the reason ASSFACE has developed these strategies of dropping protein farts and stinky bombs in and around the geeks, stickboys, cousin franky's, tina corolla's, carolyn cameltoe's, and dumbbell dipshits at your very own gym!!

THE HIT AND RUN - effective, and you can laugh about it from a safe distance. Walk by them during their set, drop your protein fart, run away. Watch them cringe 15-20 seconds later.
THE YEAH I DID THAT - when squidly hops in front of your mirror, drop your bomb and sit there staring at 'em. They will cringe and then you can say"Yeah, I did That!
THE UPPER DECK- effective against douchebag gym owners and their little cousin Franky who works behind the desk - only works on toilets with a water tank on top. Close stall door - take of water tank lid - drop you stinky bomb in the tank - put the lid back on. By the time they realize where the smell is coming from - they have a water tank full of stew on their hands.
THE STINK PLATE - also effective against douchebag gym owners -in your home - pack a paper plate and saran wrap in your gym back. Go to the gym. In the locker room, hit a stall and crap on the plate. Cover it with saran wrap. No make sure no one sees you, put the plate in a locker and lock it. Flush the key down the toilet. stink plate in the house.
THE CLUSTER BOMB- have your trainging buddies eat some beans and rice before the gym. Throw in some cheerios for good measure - with your training buddies in tow, you can drop a string of protein farts in a hit and run fashion anywhere in the gym.
THE YOU THINK ITS THERE STINK BOMB - when you see squidly coming towards the water fountain, beat him there, take your drink, squeeze out a nice protein fart, then run away. Squidly then steps up to the fountain, and the people in line behind him thinks its his stink!
THE AEROBIC BOMB - usually the aerobic areas have fans blowing all around. In this area, go up wind of the person who is your target. Let er rip and the fan powered protein fart drifts there way. Very effective against the cell phone runners as they arent paying any attention to whats going on. They tlak, talk, and then cringe as the waft of decaying myoplex enters their nostrils.

ASSFACE HAS FUN AT THE GYM. NEXT TIME YOU FIND YOURSELF STANDING IN A HAZE OF PROTEIN FART, CHANCES ARE IT BY SOMEONE USING ONE OF THESE TECHNIQUES