Please Scroll Down to See Forums Below ............yeah, your house sounds like mine was. it is easier to back down on disipline than it is to increase it. did my father border on what is now called child abuse?? perhaps, who knows, there is a thin line between child abuse and strong disipline, i don't think NOW that they crossed the line..... he and my mother raised four kids who are all self supporting, drug and crime free, and can find their collective ass with both hands. looking around at the human dereck on tv talk shows, i don't think they did too bad of a job on the four of us.Thaibox said:
Parents, and those who plan on having kids....to SPANK or not to SPANK?
- Thread starter Big Buck
- Start date
frorider6
New member
I think they should be spanked (the way beastboy said) when they're too young to reason with. So probably up until age 5. It should be done immediately after the offense but never out of anger.
Of course, I don't have kids so I have no idea what I'm talking about.
As for spanking in public, I have a better solution. When I was young (about 5-9) and I misbehaved in a restraunt, my dad didn't make a big scene by dragging me outside for a spanking. Instead, he would very quickly thump me on the head with the back of a spoon. It was quick, did no damage and no one ever noticed. But damn did it get my attention. I never cried after getting thumped like that. I would just usually sit there rubbing my head wondering what the fuck just happened.
Of course, I don't have kids so I have no idea what I'm talking about.
As for spanking in public, I have a better solution. When I was young (about 5-9) and I misbehaved in a restraunt, my dad didn't make a big scene by dragging me outside for a spanking. Instead, he would very quickly thump me on the head with the back of a spoon. It was quick, did no damage and no one ever noticed. But damn did it get my attention. I never cried after getting thumped like that. I would just usually sit there rubbing my head wondering what the fuck just happened.
Bikini Mod
New member
SPANK!
But as they get older this becomes too easy and less effective it is then that you have to bring out the BIG GUNS ie psychological torture! LOL
Ex -
When my oldest was in kindergarten she was being VERY DEFIANT so I told her either go with the program or no birthday party (It was the first classmate's birthday party she had been invited too - all of my children stayed home with me till kindergaren so this was a BIG DEAL.). It was a little boy that was a friend that she talked of often and it was a BOWLING PARTY! I thought FOR SURE this would do the trick. WRONG! She did not alter her behavior. So now I was faced with the delima: I can't take back what I said, but I was afraid that I was being too harsh. I mean she was REALLY looking forward to it. I asked close friends whom I respected and my pediatrician (who I WUV). They all concurred. If I backed down now, she would walk all over me in the future.
The day of the party came. I put some cash in a card and had the child sign her name. Then we walked up to the birthday child and his mom. I had MY DAUGHTER explain to them IN FRONT OF HER CLASSMATES why she couldn't stay and had her apologize for not being able to be present when she did originally accept the invitation.
Did it work? To this day ALL FOUR (this is the oldest child who was 5 at the time) REMEMBER!
You betch your ass it did!
There is an old Hungarian saying that I remind myself of when I feel badly about having to discipline my children: "It is better for YOU to cry NOW, than for ME to cry LATER!"
Nuff said!
But as they get older this becomes too easy and less effective it is then that you have to bring out the BIG GUNS ie psychological torture! LOL
Ex -
When my oldest was in kindergarten she was being VERY DEFIANT so I told her either go with the program or no birthday party (It was the first classmate's birthday party she had been invited too - all of my children stayed home with me till kindergaren so this was a BIG DEAL.). It was a little boy that was a friend that she talked of often and it was a BOWLING PARTY! I thought FOR SURE this would do the trick. WRONG! She did not alter her behavior. So now I was faced with the delima: I can't take back what I said, but I was afraid that I was being too harsh. I mean she was REALLY looking forward to it. I asked close friends whom I respected and my pediatrician (who I WUV). They all concurred. If I backed down now, she would walk all over me in the future.
The day of the party came. I put some cash in a card and had the child sign her name. Then we walked up to the birthday child and his mom. I had MY DAUGHTER explain to them IN FRONT OF HER CLASSMATES why she couldn't stay and had her apologize for not being able to be present when she did originally accept the invitation.
Did it work? To this day ALL FOUR (this is the oldest child who was 5 at the time) REMEMBER!
You betch your ass it did!
There is an old Hungarian saying that I remind myself of when I feel badly about having to discipline my children: "It is better for YOU to cry NOW, than for ME to cry LATER!"
Nuff said!
THeMaCHinE
New member
I just usually talk about the horrible naughty girl monster that will eat her face off if she continues to be bad...then thump my foot on the floor and tell her the monster is coming up the back stairway... seems to do the trick...
Kidding -- (ok, I did it once, but I felt REALLY bad afterwards) the punishment fits the crime in our house. They either get verbally reprimanded, time-outs, flicked on the hand (or leg if they're kicking), "warning" patted (1/2 spank), or spanked on the butt. We don't make a big production of it and we swat at the time of indiscresion. We do try to positively reinforce our kids... i.e. not "if you don't eat your dinner, you can't watch Little Mermaid", we're "if you eat all your dinner like a big girl, you get to watch Little Mermaid!"
Kidding -- (ok, I did it once, but I felt REALLY bad afterwards) the punishment fits the crime in our house. They either get verbally reprimanded, time-outs, flicked on the hand (or leg if they're kicking), "warning" patted (1/2 spank), or spanked on the butt. We don't make a big production of it and we swat at the time of indiscresion. We do try to positively reinforce our kids... i.e. not "if you don't eat your dinner, you can't watch Little Mermaid", we're "if you eat all your dinner like a big girl, you get to watch Little Mermaid!"
CrimsonKing
New member
I spank on VERY rare situations.. Usually just the threat is more than enough...
THeMaCHinE
New member
CrimsonKing said:
Ditto
Y_lifter
New member
My .02 as I have a very well behaved 10 yr old Daughter.
Spanking when they are young means you can gain their respect early and not have to use corporal punishment when they get older.
Spanking is not the magic bullet and may not work for some kids.
We started to spank her lightly on the butt at probably 2.5 or so when she started to test us.
I remember we used a wooden spoon that made a POP noise on the plastic of her diaper that did not hurt but got her attention when we said "NO" in a very stern voice at the same time.
(to this day we can go to the drawer where the wooden spoons are kept and she straightens up)
We agreed to NEVER strike her anywhere above the waist.
She got swatted on the butt or the upper thigh ONE TIME for the infraction.
I can never recall spanking her more than the One pop.
Spanking rules IMO..
Start early and be very consistant. Get their respect at an early age.
Spank them Immediatly when they are doing something wrong and tell them "why" when they get old enough to understand, and say "NO" to them when they are younger. The "Wait till your father gets home" stuff is not a good Idea IMO.
Public spanking should be Minimized. Some people in public will cause you grief even though it's none of their business. Take them out to the car and talk about the issue the whole time and the child gets a few Min to think about it and let it sink in.
No false warning after warning after warning without follow thru.
They will lean to play you like a fiddle on that one real quick.
If you get their respect early, you can STOP spanking at say age 8 or so and then change to a Deprive punishment. Spanking into the teens in not good IMO as they go from fear or respect to anger at you for spanking them.
Find out what they really like and take it away for a Week Minimum.
What they like will change over time and you must keep up with what's hot to deprive them of.
And lastly, Use your instincts regarding punishment. What works for one child may not work for yours, and what works this year definitely will not work next year.
Good luck Buck...
Spanking when they are young means you can gain their respect early and not have to use corporal punishment when they get older.
Spanking is not the magic bullet and may not work for some kids.
We started to spank her lightly on the butt at probably 2.5 or so when she started to test us.
I remember we used a wooden spoon that made a POP noise on the plastic of her diaper that did not hurt but got her attention when we said "NO" in a very stern voice at the same time.
(to this day we can go to the drawer where the wooden spoons are kept and she straightens up)
We agreed to NEVER strike her anywhere above the waist.
She got swatted on the butt or the upper thigh ONE TIME for the infraction.
I can never recall spanking her more than the One pop.
Spanking rules IMO..
Start early and be very consistant. Get their respect at an early age.
Spank them Immediatly when they are doing something wrong and tell them "why" when they get old enough to understand, and say "NO" to them when they are younger. The "Wait till your father gets home" stuff is not a good Idea IMO.
Public spanking should be Minimized. Some people in public will cause you grief even though it's none of their business. Take them out to the car and talk about the issue the whole time and the child gets a few Min to think about it and let it sink in.
No false warning after warning after warning without follow thru.
They will lean to play you like a fiddle on that one real quick.
If you get their respect early, you can STOP spanking at say age 8 or so and then change to a Deprive punishment. Spanking into the teens in not good IMO as they go from fear or respect to anger at you for spanking them.
Find out what they really like and take it away for a Week Minimum.
What they like will change over time and you must keep up with what's hot to deprive them of.
And lastly, Use your instincts regarding punishment. What works for one child may not work for yours, and what works this year definitely will not work next year.
Good luck Buck...
Last edited:
Sexual Mustard
New member
Hell yeah I'll spank, and will do more if necessary! I'm glad my dad beat the shit out of me.
Today's kids are so fucked up now. No way am I gonna let my kids off easy..
Today's kids are so fucked up now. No way am I gonna let my kids off easy..
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