Official Elite Haiku Thread For Today

[decem]

no, not darts, don't work
big bear foot snapper clamp thing
must have strong chain though

 

[kronk]

bright pink happiness
wet juicy slick yum creamy
lick suck nibble cum

 

[decem]

ever notice this
yoda or vietnamese
peoples haiku voice

 

[HappyScrappy]

ever notice this
balls are so soft and squishy
bet you want to suck

 

[Raina]

Too many haikus
Starting to speak in this form.
I sound very strange.

 

[Y_lifter]

ever notice this
grey hair moves from head on down
I found a grey pube

 

[decem]

no. you notice this?
scrappy always speaks on balls
balls this balls that balls

 

[Raina]

no, not darts, don't work
big bear foot snapper clamp thing
must have strong chain though

I don't have a trap
I have pens, tape, and kleenex
I think I am fucked.

 

[decem]

pens and tape perfect
macguiver would be all set
tape trap, pen good shank

 

[Y_lifter]

a trap is not needed
what works best is at hand
WhiteOut fumes, goodnight

 

[Raina]

Scrap's in denial
We know he wants some man love
He won't admit it.

 

[decem]

i'll never give it
look to karsun, poink, or corn
barking up wrong tree

 

[HappyScrappy]

don't want the man love
just nice tits and a tight ass
oh and must be blonde

 

[decem]

balls balls always balls
you've never mentioned tits, ass
why now, no more balls?

 

[HappyScrappy]

I always mean mine
do you want to suck on them
has been a rough day

 

[decem]

don't suck balls nugga
why you always ask men though?
for your balls, you bi?

 

[Y_lifter]

WTF is Bi ?
just another name for for gay?
yes, Y thinks it's so

 

[Y_lifter]

performance review
got mine today from the boss
highest rating, Huh?

 

[decem]

bi in happy's case?
men suck his balls, but he lies
says he likes tits, ass

 

[decem]

more haikus today?
everybody off work now?
you write more now please

 

[HappyScrappy]

sucking on nuts bitch
puts happyscrappy in charge
would rather go down

on a chick is best
but funny when I pretend
scare the homophobes

 

[vixenbabe]

Some girl on girl play
but creepy men stand and whack
Shoo them away- SCAT!

 

[decem]

am bumping this post
just got here, already bored
another slow day

 

[HappyScrappy]

cheeseburger my love
hold me close, for I love you
oh sweet meat sandwhich

 

[Raina]

Sigh...my weekend sucked
Tears, storms, death, deep squatting too
My legs really hurt

 

[HappyScrappy]

prune juice, I love you
dear sweet nectar of the gods
makes my bowels move

 

[decem]

i have to crap now
yams, corn, barbeque chicken
and some beer last night

 

[HappyScrappy]

I just went poopy
large and in charge, that is me
now I'm all tingles.

 

[decem]

still cant poop just yet
don't know why, stomach full, big
can't even walk good

 

[HappyScrappy]

like pregnant women
what you need to do is push
have toilet nearby

 

[CrimsonKing]

What a lovely sight!
To vanish into ones self
testing the fabric

 

[decem]

what a flippin tool
tries acting all poetic
david greenhill

 

[HappyScrappy]

have AIMed with both
do not think they are the same
but also don't care

 

[Y_lifter]

Van Gogh's Starry Night
I saw it and it whacked me
I had to have it

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

This thread is quite cool,
Whoever thinks Nets will win,
I pity the fool!!

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

I like catch phrases,
the last was one was Mr. T's,
He has a mohawk.

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

Bringing up my posts,
that's what this thread means to me.
I'm so fucken bored.

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

Carrottop approaches,
says dial 1-800...
I cave his face in.

 

[68GT350]

Been away too long.
Bet you miss me so damn much.
I can not complain.

 

[68GT350]

What I want to know,
Can balls be sucked many times,
and still not be gay?

Sure, balls can be soft.
And yes, so squishy and clean.
But what does it mean?

To want some big dude,
To ask this guy such strange things,
seems so iffy, no?

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

Another ode to the Load

Have to drop a load,
I can't continue these rants,
call me poopy pants.

 

[decem]

rage sure can haiku
funny, witty, poop and nets
all the essentials

 

[Raina]

Decem is the best
He's a hell of a nugga
Thanks for everything

 

[kronk]

ALA is great
Carb Destroying Holds Power
Piss Smells Like Toxic Waste

 

[Boach]

Kronk likes to fuck much.
This I can see with all posts.
One lucky bastard.

 

[decem]

no problem nuggette
kronk.. tyler's is horse shit though
boach.. why two handles?

 

[decem]

nugga.. 'tis a cool word
everyone should use it
in their next haiku

 

[kronk]

nuggette's and kronkette's
YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM
need I say more nugga

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

Ode to Pac

Dead nugga asks God,
Does heaven have a ghetto?
No, you are in hell.

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

Counting syllables,
some are not following form.
This chaps my wienie.

 

[decem]

rage is my nugga
added religion to mix
now that is haiku

 

[kronk]

Religion is Bunk
Open Your Mind And See All
Control Your Own World

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

Wienie or wiener,
Tough choosing which word to use.
How about penis.

Losing it big time,
That haiku was major crap.
Must bring back the poop.

 

[decem]

i've opened my eyes
now i know and see it all
now i am detached

 

[kronk]

Detachment is Key
You are now free from chains
Run fast dont get caught

 

[decem]

nowhere to run now
no reason to run really
i have no fears now

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

ALA is great
Carb Destroying Holds Power
Piss Smells Like Toxic Waste

It certainly stinks,
But the waste can be useful,
unclogs all my sinks.

 

[BlackJack]

my observation
he who stands on the toilet
is now high-on-pot

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

my observation
he who stands on the toilet
is now high-on-pot

Too many bong hits,
Smoked yourself retarded.
Buhleeve dat, nugga!!

 

[decem]

thank you for wedding
only 5 or 6 more now
can't think what to write

 

[HappyScrappy]

for the love of christ
somebody hire my ass
hate my fucking job

 

[decem]

what do you do nugs?
garbage man? burger flipper?
want to shine my shoes?

 

[HappyScrappy]

I am code ninja
java and perl, others too
management here sucks

 

[addickt]

It hurts when I pee
Chlamydia is not fun
tell your mom thank you

 

[decem]

fuck java, fuck perl
fuck computers, fuck IT
fuck microsoft, fuck

 

[decem]

hmmm... ditto ditto
ditto ditto ditto.. hmmm..
hmmm.. ditto ditto

 

[addickt]

Nugga Goatfucker
What is your problem Decem
Get off my nuts now

 

[decem]

silly silly ape
when did all of this begin?
internet owns you.

 

[decem]

angry, sad, upset
name calling and the flaming
ditto.. all i said

 

[HappyScrappy]

versata workflow
this is a program that sucks
makes me full of hate

 

[decem]

stupid end users
it's the numlock key moron
shouldn't have PC

 

[decem]

office, netmeeting
VPN, dial-up, citrix
SAP, hardware



support all of those
as well as mainframe, NT
2000, XP



list goes on and on
i'm usually slow though
sit on butt, type words

 

[decem]

y'all niggas had 'nuff
gimme so mo.. y'all niggas
huh.. gimme so mo



forgot the song's words
would not have fit anyway
darnit you busta

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

Routed in Game One,
Stick a fork in Who Jersey,
The Nets are done.

 

[BlackJack]

If you stick your head
in your ass and jump three times
you will disappear

friend didn't believe
so he tried one day for fun
we still can't find him



aliens land on
earth naked, how do we know
what not to look at

 

[Boach]

It is four A M
From running, I have returned.
Sweat soaks my body

Why can't I feel tired?
What's wrong with my stupid ass?
Getting laid could help.

 

[decem]

i need to go run
i am quite the fatass now
damn stubborn blubber

 

[u4ik_RAGE]

You are a fatass?
Running is one of the keys,
Lose that cheese with ease.

 

[decem]

anger hate sad mad
love fun elation silly
i feel none of these

 

[Boach]

Head filled with chaos?
Something just not quite right, huh?
Running clears the mind.

 

[decem]

addickt my sweetheart
don't be sore or mad or glum
tis you i adore

 

[decem]

Head filled with chaos?
Something just not quite right, huh?
Running clears the mind.

nope, no chaos here
nothing in fact, emptiness
my heart is bone dry

 

[decem]

addickt my dear boy
i miss thee ever so much
come back to me, please

 

[addickt]

addickt my sweetheart
don't be sore or mad or glum
tis you i adore

I forgive you nug
You make my heart flutter boy
Always..... Your boy toy.

 

[addickt]

addickt my dear boy
i miss thee ever so much
come back to me, please

Suck my balls decem
Think of you, hold my titty
Now I am gitty

 

[decem]

edit edited
edit edited edit
edited edit

 

[decem]

you said nug, jesus
my boy is back.. thank jesus
go to prom with me.

 

[addickt]

titty or pity
which do you wish to stroke
i say the latter

Do not start a war
You know that you cannot win
I have photos of you

 

[decem]

edit edited
edit edited edit
edited edit.



pics do not scare me
i am guilty of no crime
oh, i too have pics


your haikus suck balls
five, seven, six - ugly crap
learn how to count nugs

 

[addickt]

I dont want to count anymore.

 

[decem]

not fun if don't count
they're fun, even if hurtful
make day go by fast

 

[decem]

tell me your woes nugs.
please do tell, what ails you friend?
all ears, i'm all ears

 

[Boach]

addickt has felt pain
I can not help but feel pity.
Your heart will heal soon.

Not far down the road,
and when you least expect it,
Faith will be renewed.

Your heart will swell up.
The soul will fly free as birds,
and smiles will return.

 

[Boach]

Yes addickt, do tell
I have yet to hear the tale.
This tale of such woe.

 

[decem]

shut the fuck up boach
fucking corny ass shit nugs
he'll find his own way

 

[Boach]

shut the fuck up boach
fucking corny ass shit nugs
he'll find his own way

Pessemistic fuck,
Lighten his spirit, I try.
Misery is bad.

 

[addickt]

Yes addickt, do tell
I have yet to hear the tale.
This tale of such woe.

I busted a nut
And confused it with meaning
I see clearly now

 

[decem]

edit edited
edit edited edit
edited edit

 

[Boach]

Change of subject now.
I have had this big craving.
Snickers ice cream bars.

 

[decem]

i'm confused no more
drop emotion completely
confusion goes too