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Nathan
- Thread starter gymtime
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Nathan
New member
Okay, this one time at the gym I thought it might be interesting to try doing a variation of the regular variety of pullups, which i like to call "The Smear." So, I took off my shirt and rubbed blueberry jam and sour cream all over my nipples, which were taught with anticipation I might add. The exercise involved trying to pull my nipples up to the bar so as to smear the mixture adorning my nips all over the bar. I like to wear chain mail cowboy pants (the ones without any ass) - with no underpants of course - and knee-high suede boots for added weight to make the exercise a little more challenging. The tricky part is to make neat patterns on the bar which I've become rather adept at doing if i do say so myself. After about 3 sets of those, I got to wondering what it might be like to wrap my penis in 10 cherry fruit roll-ups and cover my testicles in Heinz Ketchup (the original of course) and then firmly press myself against a mirror. Well, let me tell you, never have I seen such beautiful pictorials in all my life. The jam and sour cream that was left on my nipples combined with the ketchup and fruit roll-ups made what, at first glance, looked like quite a disgusting mess. It was in essence far more than that though. It was a piece of my soul I had plastered on that mirror. I began to cry at that moment staring at the outline of my testicles made with ketchup and I felt something deep inside me stir and come to life. I have never been the same since that fateful day and I no longer view "art" with the same respect I once did.
Anyway, once I finished crying I turned towards the receptionist and masturbated in her general direction to show her how enthusiastic I felt about my artwork. Okay, that part's a lie but I really did masturbate in the women's changeroom after all that jazz which, apparently, is more than just frowned upon.
Anyway, once I finished crying I turned towards the receptionist and masturbated in her general direction to show her how enthusiastic I felt about my artwork. Okay, that part's a lie but I really did masturbate in the women's changeroom after all that jazz which, apparently, is more than just frowned upon.
HappyScrappy
New member
be careful the anabolic board has steroid users on it.
HappyScrappy
New member
when I was on G, I would contemplate sex with anything.
my couch looked fantastic.
as for steroids - no more for me.
or I should say "none morer"
my couch looked fantastic.
as for steroids - no more for me.
or I should say "none morer"
HappyScrappy
New member
I used to read the anabolic board and not read this one.
but then I stopped doing the drugs, yet still was addicted to the refresh button, so I came over here and started licking the screen more.
reminds me, need to buy more windex.
but then I stopped doing the drugs, yet still was addicted to the refresh button, so I came over here and started licking the screen more.
reminds me, need to buy more windex.
Freak Show
New member
these days??? try every day since this place opened. anytime you have that much testosterone on one board you're gonna have some itchy trigger fingers.Nathan said:
i am intrigued by the competition bet. the chat and ana board. i would set up a round robin tournament where we battled to the death with those large q-tip things american gladiators used to use.
HappyScrappy
New member
I ask you - what the fuck is wrong with fighting with normal sized q-tips? why the preoccupation with everything having to be oversized and big.
if you could get over that, perhaps you wouldn't need steroids.
that is why I think we should fight with just normal sized q-tips.
if you could get over that, perhaps you wouldn't need steroids.
that is why I think we should fight with just normal sized q-tips.
HappyScrappy said:
i was once told that when one uses mouth wash before licking, you get a shiny, clean appearance on your computer monitor. listerine is what i recommend. i give it to my dog. he tends to lick a lot! i get him to lick the windows and coffee table too! it is just amazing how much cleaning that licking fool can do! it also helps in my coupon cutting time at home. i save money and time by not having to buy windex! you should try it sometime!
