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THeMaCHinE
New member
boogers clog nose like candy apples that are stale and festering in the saliva of a disease-ridden hot dog salesman. You say what? Huh?
me BorEd
- Thread starter THeMaCHinE
- Start date
K
Kryp2o
Guest
A highway patrolman comes upon a terrible wreak on what looks like a safe section of road. There was no evidence of an other vehicle been involved. Both the driver and passenger were dead.
As he looked upon the wreckage, a tiny monkey skipped out of the bush and sat at the cops feet. The cop looked down at the little monkey, "boy I wish you could talk."
The monkey looked at the cop and motioned his head up and down. "You can understand what I'm saying?" the copper asked. Again the monkey nodded his head affirmative.
"Well, did you see what happened?"
"yes" motioned the monkey.
"Yell me what happened."
The monkey pretended to open and drink a stubby.
"They were drinking?" asked the cop.
"Yes" nodded the monkey, who then pinched his finger and thumb together and held it to his mouth.
"And smoking marijuana?"
The cleaver monkey again nodded yes.
"What else."
The monkey made a circle with his thumb and index finger on one hand, and with the other hand, inserted the middle finger in and out,
"You mean they were having sex, too?"
"yes"
"So you're telling me they were both drunk and stoned and otherwise occupied before crashing."
"Yes"
"And what were you doing during this time?"
"Driving" the monkey motioned.
As he looked upon the wreckage, a tiny monkey skipped out of the bush and sat at the cops feet. The cop looked down at the little monkey, "boy I wish you could talk."
The monkey looked at the cop and motioned his head up and down. "You can understand what I'm saying?" the copper asked. Again the monkey nodded his head affirmative.
"Well, did you see what happened?"
"yes" motioned the monkey.
"Yell me what happened."
The monkey pretended to open and drink a stubby.
"They were drinking?" asked the cop.
"Yes" nodded the monkey, who then pinched his finger and thumb together and held it to his mouth.
"And smoking marijuana?"
The cleaver monkey again nodded yes.
"What else."
The monkey made a circle with his thumb and index finger on one hand, and with the other hand, inserted the middle finger in and out,
"You mean they were having sex, too?"
"yes"
"So you're telling me they were both drunk and stoned and otherwise occupied before crashing."
"Yes"
"And what were you doing during this time?"
"Driving" the monkey motioned.
imprint516
New member
" guys working in lumber yard,cuts off all 10 fingers cutting a tree with a buzzsaw,goes to ER and the doc says OOOO!,well gimme the fingers Ill see what I can do, Guys says I don't have the fingers, DOC says what do you mean you dont have the fingers?...its the 90's we have microsurgery and all kinds of technology we could have maybe put them all back on and even better then new at that,why didnt u bring the fingerS? He says well Shit doc I couldnt pick them up!" LOL
"
lady goes golfing, gets hit in the ass with a golf ball REALLY hard with a golf ball, goes to doc, he goes where did you get hit? she goes between THE 1st and 2nd HOLE LOL, Well that doesnt leave much room for the bandaid!" LOL LOL
For all you Jackie Jokeman fans.
"
lady goes golfing, gets hit in the ass with a golf ball REALLY hard with a golf ball, goes to doc, he goes where did you get hit? she goes between THE 1st and 2nd HOLE LOL, Well that doesnt leave much room for the bandaid!" LOL LOL
For all you Jackie Jokeman fans.
thefantom1
New member
The squirrel is still alive.... hiding somewhere...........
