Love Tips & More from the ASSASIN

[>>ASSASSIN X<<]

ASSASSIN wll answer any & all queries about life's mysteries in this thread. Ask the ASSASSIN any question & he will provide an insightful, well though-out response. You must hurry, however, as the ASSASSIN fully expects to be bad Karma'd into hyperspace very shortly.

Some Important Groundrules:

1. ASSASSIN always refers to himself in the 3rd person, you are encouraged to do the same.

2. You would be correct if you assumed that the ASSASSIN has had ALL of the ladies of Elite. Those who did not sleep with ASSASSIN, blew him. Any chick denying having carnal knowledge of the ASSASSIN either never got a 2nd midnight Booty Call or ASSASSIN used his "old fake name trick" he reserves for the obese or acutely unattractive. (Nature Boy, this might help explain all of the nasty emails you have been receiving from ugly chicks. Sorry, ASSASSIN just could not say his name was Happy Scrappy with a straight face.)

3. Be gentle with the ASSASSIN as he got so drunk last night he either fucked a short hairy chick, badly in need of a Tic Tac, or the neighbor's Basset Hound, Floppy. Either way it was worth the 20 bucks.

MORAL: Dating that parking lot hoochie Alexiarenee will drive you to drink.

NOW.......BRING IT!!

 

[>>ASSASSIN X<<]

Addickt would like to know if you spelled asassin incorrectly on purpose........ And yes Addickt spelled Addickt incorretly on purpose.

Addickt just likes the way KT looks.

Despite popular opinion, ASSASSIN is not perfekt.

 

[supersizeme]

>> AssassinX <<

I'm almost out of my free sample tube of Astroglide. Yet I enjoy sodomizing females on a regular basis. Where can I get more? Or better yet, how can i convince my sodomees that lube is not needed?

 

[addickt]

Addickt would like to point out that he was trying to elicit a response to explore your vast knowledge....... Assassin was correct the first time and should have believed in his spelling ability.

 

[the nature boy]

sweet!!! he's back. I miss the funny karma. I think your last one said something about a flock of seaguls mullet or someshit.

 

[TheProject]

Addickt would like to point out that he was trying to elicit a response to explore your vast knowledge....... Assassin was correct the first time and should have believed in his spelling ability.

Dude, you're a tool!

 

[addickt]

Addickt would like to know what is the best way to "hurry" death in a spouse so you can collect life insurance money.... Addickt would like to inform you that it must look like an "accident"

 

[addickt]

Dude, you're a tool!

Mission accomplished.

 

[>>ASSASSIN X<<]

>> AssassinX <<

I'm almost out of my free sample tube of Astroglide. Yet I enjoy sodomizing females on a regular basis. Where can I get more? Or better yet, how can i convince my sodomees that lube is not needed?

By females, do you mean, fat hairy gay men in silk pirate shirts?

 

[>>ASSASSIN X<<]

DOT suspects that Assassin X is either Cornholio, WODIN or havoc. Is DOT correct in thinking that you are one of the above named buttsplitters?

You are correct, the above mentioned are in fact buttsplitters. The ASSASSIN is however, not a buttsplitter...ok once in a while....but he isn't one of those buttsplitters.

 

[>>ASSASSIN X<<]

Addickt would like to know what is the best way to "hurry" death in a spouse so you can collect life insurance money.... Addickt would like to inform you that it must look like an "accident"

ASSASSIN love tip: you never win when it comes to women, ASSASSIN suggests that you do not rule out shooting yourself or moving to Afghanistan to join the Taliban.

 

[>>ASSASSIN X<<]

Despite popular opinion, ASSASSIN is not perfekt.

ASSASSIN just stood in front of the mirror naked and now stands corrected. ASSASSIN is, in fact perfect. Please hold your applause until the end.

 

[addickt]

ASSASSIN love tip: you never win when it comes to women, ASSASSIN suggests that you do not rule out shooting yourself or moving to Afghanistan to join the Taliban.

Assassin loves Smalls..............shirts. Addickt means small shirts.

 

[>>ASSASSIN X<<]

Assassin loves Smalls..............shirts. Addickt means small shirts.

If by "love" you mean "does her doggy style" your first assumption was correct. If you want feedback on small shirts ask Nature Boy who often wears cut-off baby Tee's with frayed Daisy Dukes to the gym.

 

[>>ASSASSIN X<<]

>> AssassinX <<

Or better yet, how can i convince my sodomees that lube is not needed?

show them how small your dick is

 

[the nature boy]

If by "love" you mean "does her doggy style" your first assumption was correct. If you want feedback on small shirts ask Nature Boy who often wears cut-off baby Tee's with frayed Daisy Dukes to the gym.

he knows too much.

 

[>>ASSASSIN X<<]

ASSASSIN is already starting to collapse under a bad Karma avalanche.....

1 good Karma, though......even though it had gay sex & beastiality overtones.

 

[the nature boy]

even though it had gay sex & beastiality overtones.

uh I thought that was normal for this place.

 

[>>ASSASSIN X<<]

uh I thought that was normal for this place.

good point.

BTW ASSASSIN is confused as to why some of his bad Karma is calling him a wigger..... ASSASSIN stopped shaving lines & his initials into his hair long ago and almost never listens to his Icy Hot Stuntaz CD anymore.

 

[addickt]

good point.

BTW ASSASSIN is confused as to why some of his bad Karma is calling him a wigger..... ASSASSIN stopped shaving lines & his initials into his hair long ago and almost never listens to his Icy Hot Stuntaz CD anymore.

Icy Hot Stuntaz is good shit.... Addickt says they got the bangin' shizzit.

 

[the nature boy]

ASSASSIN stopped shaving lines & his initials into his hair long ago and almost never listens to his Icy Hot Stuntaz CD anymore.

<another clue. he's familiar with the Stuntaz and he's into mullets. well that leaves about 80% of EF as suspects.>

 

[>>ASSASSIN X<<]

Icy Hot Stuntaz is good shit.... Addickt says they got the bangin' shizzit.

Hey Mr. Spelling Bee....it's spelled s-h-i-z-n-i-t.

 

[alexiarenee]

MORAL: Dating that parking lot hoochie Alexiarenee will drive you to drink.

LMAO!
Hey there baby..where ya been?????

 

[the nature boy]

bump

 

[SAGAT]

i finally figured it out.......ASSASSIN X is in fact....ASSFACE...or at least thats what i think

 

[polarpixie]