Saying eat like hell or you won't grow is a shitty statement... You don't have to be eating like a pig to grow at all. Obviously if you are eating fast food all day you are gonna get the calories and some protein but shit you're gonna look like the pillsbury dough boy.
I dont think you have to have 5000+ cals a day to grow. Eat good healthy food, don't go over board. I don't think it is needed.
I have found that this intake is a good idea for gaining while staying lean:
Protein: 350g
Carbs: 250g
Fat: 60g from meat and efa's
This is what my diet looks like when i am trying to gain some muscle and stay lean.
Breakfast: Half a carton of egg beaters made with flax oil, kraft fat free cheese, fat free refried beans, on a whole weat flour tortilla.
It's about 60g protein, 50 carbs, 10g fat
Lunch: Protein Shake 50g protein, 30 carbs, 10 fat from flax
Snack: Same as lunch 50g prot, 300 carbs, 10 fat from flax
Post workout: Carb Drink with protein
50g prot, 80 carbs, 10 fat from flax
Dinner: 2 chicken breast, Sweet Potato, Some kind of greens
65g protein, 70g carbs, 20g fat from chicken and flax
Post dinner snack: Blue Bunny Ice Cream lite bar
10 carbs, 6 grams of fat
Before Bed Shake:
50g protein, 30 carbs, 10 fat
So add it up: 325g protein
-----------------300g carbs
-----------------66g fat
Total Cals: A little more than 3000 cals
In my opinion this is a great way to get big and stay lean
I would also suggest an r-ala, CLA, GLA stack and go higher on the carbs...
That stack will help you burn the fat while eating 2 or more times the carbs i said.