Is this off base?

[Scotsman]

So this girl I asked out earlier this year (who rejected me) is now trying to set me up with another girl. But I figure why would I let someone who isn't willing to date me themself set me up with someone else? It's couterintuitive to my way of thinking.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[silverstar1025]

Maybe she doesn't think you were right for her, but feels you are a good match for her friend. I see nothing wrong with it.

 

[SpyWizard]

 

[Raptorex]

Scots, no offense - I think you need girlie lessons

 

[vixensghost]

I tend not to burn bridges.


I think you should go on said date ;so the matchmaker can find out what she lost. That'll show her.

 

[nimbus]

i'm guessing girl1 thinks you are a good guy but feels no attraction to you. girl2 is probably desperate to meat someone, and girl1 would rather it be you than someone random scumbag

 

[needtogetarmy]

Maybe she doesn't think you were right for her, but feels you are a good match for her friend. I see nothing wrong with it.

Silverstar is right on. I would date the girl.

 

[Raptorex]

anyone else here thinking threesome? or do I just have a dirty mind.

 

[Scotsman]

Scots, no offense - I think you need girlie lessons

no offense taken man, I readily admit I know nothing about women. I did greatly simplify the whole issue though.

cheers,
scotsman

 

[Beachboy6294]

What do you have to lose going on a date with her friend?

 

[canadianhitman]

What do you have to lose going on a date with her friend?

I agree. If anything, I'd be highly motivated to have a great date, get her in the sack, and then pull out the whole arsenal whilst banging her brains out...if for no other reason than to have her report back to her friend so she'd know what she missed.

 

[PICK3]

Before she sets you up with her friend, did she volunteer to go shopping with you to pick out a new skirt for your big date?

 

[Scotsman]

I tend not to burn bridges.


I think you should go on said date ;so the matchmaker can find out what she lost. That'll show her.

The real problem is there isn't a bridge to burn. I unfortuneately have to encounter the "matchmake" since she works with some of my friends. I try to have as little contact with her as possible though and it has nothing to do with getting rejected(it's going to happen a lot in life so no use getting upset about it).

My point is if someone doesn't see enough value to be at least interested in you then how would they possibly know if someone else would be?

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[PICK3]

I have had enough of you slandering and disparaging my heritage. Do it again and I will have administration step in. This is not a joke and should not be treated as such.

Scotsman

 

[heavy_duty]

she thinks you're ok but just no ok for her. no big deal.
any date is better than no date as long as she doesnt have balls and a penis.

 

[GoldenDelicious]

The real problem is there isn't a bridge to burn. I unfortuneately have to encounter the "matchmake" since she works with some of my friends. I try to have as little contact with her as possible though and it has nothing to do with getting rejected(it's going to happen a lot in life so no use getting upset about it).

My point is if someone doesn't see enough value to be at least interested in you then how would they possibly know if someone else would be?

Cheers,
Scotsman

because youre in the friend zone with girl number 1. what shes saying is "yorue a quality guy, but im personally not attracted"

you need to learn how to generate attraction in the opposite sex. at the moment, youre demonstrating that yorue a good provider type.

 

[heavy_duty]

stay away from the Nice Guy Friend Zone - fuck that -

 

[Scotsman]

Wow, could maybe just one person ever answer the original question?

I really don't recall asking for dating advice, but simply asked if my thought process was offbase.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Scotsman]

because youre in the friend zone with girl number 1. what shes saying is "yorue a quality guy, but im personally not attracted"

you need to learn how to generate attraction in the opposite sex. at the moment, youre demonstrating that yorue a good provider type.

You can't be in the friend zone with someone you aren't friends with.

Now how about answering my original question.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[GoldenDelicious]

You can't be in the friend zone with someone you aren't friends with.

Now how about answering my original question.

Cheers,
Scotsman

friend zone = i like you but dont want to transition sexually with you

and in regards to your original question, then yes, i think youre off base. just because girl number 1 isnt attracted to you doesnt invalidate her opinion of you. you should judge your compatibility with girl number 2 on its own merits, rather than dismissing a potentially decent match because youre proud.

 

[Scotsman]

friend zone = i like you but dont want to transition sexually with you

and in regards to your original question, then yes, i think youre off base. just because girl number 1 isnt attracted to you doesnt invalidate her opinion of you. you should judge your compatibility with girl number 2 on its own merits, rather than dismissing a potentially decent match because youre proud.

She's made it pretty clear she doesn't like me so I was extremely surprised that she was attempting to get me to talk to some other girl.

Has nothing to do with pride. I just can't logically see how it works.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[calveless wonder]

you are off base.

and i think everyone's responses answered your question.

there are plenty of female friends that will set you up with their friends etc.
i think it's a pretty good broette move on her part. her personal preference has nothing to do with another girls

its why female friends are good sometimes because they sometimes do things like this.

it makes absolutely no sense to think the way you do.

not wanting to date someone and not liking somebody as a person are two completely different things

 

[Scotsman]

you are off base.

Right there is all the answer that is necessary. This is basically a yes no question.

Pretty much everyone who responded didn't answer the question and made the monumental leap as to whether or not I am going to talk/go on date with the girl. The first part of the post in regards to the original girl was the catalyst for the question.

So I thank you for your input.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[ceo]

PuddleMonkey can set you up with this girl!!!!!!!!111

 

[Scotsman]

PuddleMonkey can set you up with this girl!!!!!!!!111

LMAO- The only thing worse than dating a pregnant chick is dating someone elses pregnant chick.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[EarthRider]

she's cheating on you bro

 

[ceo]

she's cheating on you bro

with PuddleMonkey!!!!!!!!!1

 

[Scotsman]

with PuddleMonkey!!!!!!!!!1

You sure are getting a lot of mileage out of that pic.LOL

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[PICK3]

I have had enough of you slandering and disparaging my heritage. Do it again and I will have administration step in. This is not a joke and should not be treated as such.

Scotsman

My sincerest apology bro.

I mistook you for someone who joined in the “PICK3 is a Mo” chorus a time or two.

We both know it would be wrong to take a dig at your apparel just because you called me a faggot or a cock sucker.

Won’t happen again.

 

[GoldenDelicious]

She's made it pretty clear she doesn't like me so I was extremely surprised that she was attempting to get me to talk to some other girl.

Has nothing to do with pride. I just can't logically see how it works.

Cheers,
Scotsman

heres a theory:

maybe she likes you more than you think. then it all makes sense

 

[GoldenDelicious]

Right there is all the answer that is necessary. This is basically a yes no question.


Cheers,
Scotsman

i actually think this is a yes no 'depends' question

also without being a bastard can i point out that being obtuse about social stuff (by ignoring the 'depends' bit) stifles social learning and leads to social miscommunication like yours, scots?

 

[Dial_tone]

So this girl I asked out earlier this year (who rejected me) is now trying to set me up with another girl. But I figure why would I let someone who isn't willing to date me themself set me up with someone else? It's couterintuitive to my way of thinking.

Cheers,
Scotsman

The same happened to me. I talked to the girl but didn't go out with her.

 

[Trendsetter21]

She's made it pretty clear she doesn't like me so I was extremely surprised that she was attempting to get me to talk to some other girl.

Has nothing to do with pride. I just can't logically see how it works.

Cheers,
Scotsman

Maybe her friend saw a pic of you and said to hook her up. So she's actually not doing it for you at all but for her friend.

 

[Scotsman]

My sincerest apology bro.

I mistook you for someone who joined in the “PICK3 is a Mo” chorus a time or two.

We both know it would be wrong to take a dig at your apparel just because you called me a faggot or a cock sucker.

Won’t happen again.

Apology accepted man. And if I offended you in the past I hope you'll accept mine.

But there is a pretty big difference between picking on someone's projected online persona and going after their heritage.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Scotsman]

i actually think this is a yes no 'depends' question

also without being a bastard can i point out that being obtuse about social stuff (by ignoring the 'depends' bit) stifles social learning and leads to social miscommunication like yours, scots?

You're not being a bastard at all and I fully understand what you're saying.

It's just the way I view this situation is this:
You wouldn't let a pharmacist give you drugs without looking at the prescription right?

You wouldn't want a doc to diagnose you without examining you right?

Do wouldn't want a mechanic to just start tearing apart your car without doing diagnostics right?

So why let someone who isn't willing to go out with you one time try and pick who you may or may not like? We are all different on a date from any other social situation. Try as we may it is impossible to not change your behaviour/attitude while in an intimate social setting with a potential partner/mate. So without that insight/reference how could someone possibly know what you are like?

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[jackangel]

off base. has anyone here mentioned: pics of this other girl? that's 99% of the equation here.

 

[BlueBird]

You're not being a bastard at all and I fully understand what you're saying.

It's just the way I view this situation is this:
You wouldn't let a pharmacist give you drugs without looking at the prescription right?

You wouldn't want a doc to diagnose you without examining you right?

Do wouldn't want a mechanic to just start tearing apart your car without doing diagnostics right?

So why let someone who isn't willing to go out with you one time try and pick who you may or may not like? We are all different on a date from any other social situation. Try as we may it is impossible to not change your behaviour/attitude while in an intimate social setting with a potential partner/mate. So without that insight/reference how could someone possibly know what you are like?

Cheers,
Scotsman

Scots, you need to defer to your right brain in regards to the matters of the heart.

 

[dirty~d~]

The real problem is there isn't a bridge to burn. I unfortuneately have to encounter the "matchmake" since she works with some of my friends. I try to have as little contact with her as possible though and it has nothing to do with getting rejected(it's going to happen a lot in life so no use getting upset about it).

My point is if someone doesn't see enough value to be at least interested in you then how would they possibly know if someone else would be?

Cheers,
Scotsman

Maybe she likes you enough to see a quality in you that she knows her friend would appreciate and would have more in common with. STOP BEING A THICKHEADED PRICK AND GO ON THE DATE!!!

 

[Scotsman]

Scots, you need to defer to your right brain in regards to the matters of the heart.

I try to defer to the right as little as possible. I am pretty much a completely logic driven person.

Hey D- you've known me how long and you're asking me to stop being thickheaded?LOL

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[dirty~d~]

Hey D- you've known me how long and you're asking me to stop being thickheaded?LOL

Cheers,
Scotsman

Try it just once and see how it goes. If it hurts you can always go back. LOL!!

It IS part of your charm though.

 

[Scotsman]

Try it just once and see how it goes. If it hurts you can always go back. LOL!!

It IS part of your charm though.

If it's part of my charm then why would I want to change that?

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[GoldenDelicious]

You're not being a bastard at all and I fully understand what you're saying.

It's just the way I view this situation is this:
You wouldn't let a pharmacist give you drugs without looking at the prescription right?

You wouldn't want a doc to diagnose you without examining you right?

Do wouldn't want a mechanic to just start tearing apart your car without doing diagnostics right?

So why let someone who isn't willing to go out with you one time try and pick who you may or may not like? We are all different on a date from any other social situation. Try as we may it is impossible to not change your behaviour/attitude while in an intimate social setting with a potential partner/mate. So without that insight/reference how could someone possibly know what you are like?

Cheers,
Scotsman

think of it more like you selling your car

if you showed your car to someone and they decided that it wasnt for them (for xyz reason) but then they called you back saying "hey my friend might like your car based on what i know of her" would you turn around to the person and say "you arent qualified to reccommend my car to anyone since you wouldnt even test drive it one time" or would you think "hey. people have different taste in cars, and this person knows their friend pretty well so she might be right. besides, since im willing to sell this car to anyone, theres no harm in offering to sell it to someone associated with someone who didnt buy it, right?"

just sayin

 

[dirty~d~]

If it's part of my charm then why would I want to change that?

Cheers,
Scotsman

So you'll go on the date!

 

[ceo]

I'd fuck em both if I were you.

 

[Scotsman]

think of it more like you selling your car

if you showed your car to someone and they decided that it wasnt for them (for xyz reason) but then they called you back saying "hey my friend might like your car based on what i know of her" would you turn around to the person and say "you arent qualified to reccommend my car to anyone since you wouldnt even test drive it one time" or would you think "hey. people have different taste in cars, and this person knows their friend pretty well so she might be right. besides, since im willing to sell this car to anyone, theres no harm in offering to sell it to someone associated with someone who didnt buy it, right?"

just sayin

The flaw in your analogy is that it make me the car since I am ostensibly the object being peddled here. And as I've mentioned ad nauseum there has been no "test drive".

But nice try.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Scotsman]

So you'll go on the date!

You're still assuming I'm not going. I haven't said whether or not I've made any decision at all, I've just posed a logic question.

And you should know by now that no one can talk me into or out of any decision I've made.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Cal_21]

Off topic: I noticed your name is red. That is pretty neat. You should tell girl #1 about this. If i were here I'd sleep with you after finding this out.

I realized this statement sounded kinda sarcastic, i didn't mean 4 it to cum out that way (just wanted it to sound a little *rainbow*) lol

 

[Scotsman]

Off topic: I noticed your name is red. That is pretty neat. You should tell girl #1 about this. If i were here I'd sleep with you after finding this out.

I realized this statement sounded kinda sarcastic, i didn't mean 4 it to cum out that way (just wanted it to sound a little *rainbow*) lol

Yeah the mods are all now in red so it's easier to know who we are and when we are on.

If a girl is that impressed by me being an internet mod then she's probably a little on the crazy side!!LOL

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[GoldenDelicious]

The flaw in your analogy is that it make me the car since I am ostensibly the object being peddled here. And as I've mentioned ad nauseum there has been no "test drive".

But nice try.

Cheers,
Scotsman

i disagree

girl 1 didnt tell the other girl to buy the car. she jsut mentioned taht she should maybe take a look kinda like the car was on the side of hte road

 

[nimbus]

STOP taking rejection personally.

the end.

 

[Bikini Mod]

Maybe she doesn't think you were right for her, but feels you are a good match for her friend. I see nothing wrong with it.

^^ 100% agreed

 

[vixensghost]

The real problem is there isn't a bridge to burn. I unfortuneately have to encounter the "matchmake" since she works with some of my friends. I try to have as little contact with her as possible though and it has nothing to do with getting rejected(it's going to happen a lot in life so no use getting upset about it).

My point is if someone doesn't see enough value to be at least interested in you then how would they possibly know if someone else would be?

Cheers,
Scotsman

Ha. If I told you how many men I rejected in my past for various "me" reasons, you'd think I were a bitch. However, I was not a bitch, I was stupid and narrow minded!

It took me awhile to find what I was looking for too. I just had to open my eyes and expand my mind a bit.

 

[Scotsman]

Ha. If I told you how many men I rejected in my past for various "me" reasons, you'd think I were a bitch. However, I was not a bitch, I was stupid and narrow minded!

It took me awhile to find what I was looking for too. I just had to open my eyes and expand my mind a bit.

Actually I wouldn't think you were a bitch at all. There isn't anything wrong with rejecting someone even if later you think it was a silly reason. I'm definitely a first intinct kind of person and if that instinct says no then I go with it.

But would you expect any of those that you rejected to value your opinion on whom they should pursue next?

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Basikstylz]

anyone else here thinking threesome? or do I just have a dirty mind.

+1

 

[Scotsman]

Maybe her friend saw a pic of you and said to hook her up. So she's actually not doing it for you at all but for her friend.

Missed this in the fray.

I've actually already met the girl. I was at the bar I used to work out (where all my friends still work) and I guess she saw me and asked the other girl about me.

One important detail is that I have a nearly mythic reputation at that place. I get introduced to people and they are like "Oh so you are ***** I've heard a lot about you". So it's probably hard for people there to separate fact from fiction and see me for me.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[vixensghost]

But would you expect any of those that you rejected to value your opinion on whom they should pursue next?

Cheers,
Scotsman

It all depends. If they blew ME off without getting to know the real me after rejection, then yeah, I'd expect them to blow off ANY idea on who I thought they could mesh well with. However, IF they stuck around and got to know me better as a "friend" , I bet a few of them MIGHT take my advice on a choice for them.

 

[Scotsman]

It all depends. If they blew ME off without getting to know the real me after rejection, then yeah, I'd expect them to blow off ANY idea on who I thought they could mesh well with. However, IF they stuck around and got to know me better as a "friend" , I bet a few of them MIGHT take my advice on a choice for them.

Now you're starting to hone in on what I'm saying. Taking a friends advice is one thing, but the advice of someone who barely knows you is another which is the exact point I have been making. Although I didn't state it so obviously because I like to see how people fill in gaps to form opinions.

I knew I liked you for more than your looks.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[heatherrae]

Get a picture first and a criminal history...lol. Blind dates are always like something out of a movie for me. SCARY

 

[Scotsman]

Get a picture first and a criminal history...lol. Blind dates are always like something out of a movie for me. SCARY

Read post 55 there sugarbutt!!

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[vixensghost]

Now you're starting to hone in on what I'm saying. Taking a friends advice is one thing, but the advice of someone who barely knows you is another which is the exact point I have been making. Although I didn't state it so obviously because I like to see how people fill in gaps to form opinions.

I knew I liked you for more than your looks.

Cheers,
Scotsman

Meet me on Barnstable Beach in the after life

 

[heatherrae]

Read post 55 there sugarbutt!!

Cheers,
Scotsman

Oh okay. I hadn't read the thread.

So you have a "mystical" reputation there. WTF did you do? Fly in side saddle wearin your kilt on a purple unicorn?



;-)

 

[Scotsman]

Meet me on Barnstable Beach in the after life

Deal!!!!

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Scotsman]

Oh okay. I hadn't read the thread.

So you have a "mystical" reputation there. WTF did you do? Fly in side saddle wearin your kilt on a purple unicorn?

Mythic not mystical.

People still tell stories about me from when I was a bouncer. Let's just say I could be very creative in finding ways to eject people from the bar.

It is kind of weird to go someplace where you have a larger than life reputation. The whole doorstaff now is absolutely terrified of me and do everything they can to be nice to me. It all makes me chuckle.

Cheers,
Scotsman