Is this f**ked up or is it just me?

[EnderJE]

It's always very easy to believe the absolutely worst in people. However, if they don't provide a decent and understandable answer, then you've said it yourself...it's time to walk and find someone else.

 

[musclemom]

Vel, take it as I'm saying it:

My first husband was a pathological liar. From my experience with his family, it is a genetic disorder. Remember something, when you are closely involved with/married to someone, you are not just with them, you are involved with their family.

If you think at least one member of his family has sticky fingers and problems with the truth, guaranteed more than one member has that problem and blood IS thicker than water, one will lie and the other will swear to it and s/o will probably side with his family over you (particularly his mother, that's a given).

If nothing else, you will need permanently need to start inventorying your stuff before they come over, you will need to remain in the house at all times with them, you will need to lock interior doors when they are coming over and I'll guarantee you he's going to give you shit about not trusting his family.

 

[heavy_duty]

Even though he knows his mom might be a thief, he is just not going to want to believe it.

 

[SpyWizard]

Distance.. 1200 miles keeps most at bay...

 

[walliwalibus]

This is really pissing you off isn't it? Wow, maybe let a calm down day or two go by before you say anything that might be uh..... you know....... wrong. Make sure this is the case is what I am saying. Don't be passing judgement on something you don't know for sure 100%. Just chill a couple days then bring it up. He'll get the point then that your serious, but it won't be as intense. Just calm down a bit is all. That's the best advise I can give, because if someone pissed me off as bad as you make me feel like your pissed, then I wouldn't be there. You are seriously questioning your spouse and well, this is a major thing, and people here don't know no matter how much you tell them, they don't know your situation.

Good Luck and calm down
It'll all come out in a few days when you bring it up again.
Also you could tell if he is lying about the basement deal too.... if you give him time to forget it.

Walli

 

[JayC9]

I'd let this one go, but keep an eye out for a pattern. I don't think it's worth ending a relationship if the guy is covering for his clepto mom, unless there are other problems as well.

Agreed, all parties involved know the score, some things are better left unsaid, let it pass.

 

[theoldone]

I got one better....over the Holidays the wife and I were at a gathering and my wife had to change shoes(women...go figure)....and we went off to another part of the house while leaving her shoes in the "coat room".

We get back to said room and some stupid bitch is trying on my wife's shoes.......How fucking ghetto is that??? she was going to steal some strangers shoes.

 

[superqt4u2nv]

Re: Is the f**ked up or is it just me?

She doesn't live with us but she's over a lot.

I don't think she was borrowing it, she either took it for herself or to give to someone else.

I was just going to change the door to a privacy handle from a passage so I can lock it.

That bag may have been the last straw for me.

Do that! Yeah I am afraid the old bat took it and more I am sure. Now more important I want to know what bag it was only the good shit gets silk covers. Spill it lady I want to know all about your collection.

P.S. I am drooling at the walk in closet the size of a bedroom please send me pics to see it.

 

[seaking420]

Yeah she took it....but your s/o is in a tough spot. You're asking him basically to chose between his mom and you....and thats a tough thing to ask a man. A son loves his mom tremendously and to ask to put you over her is not right either. However he should come clean to you if he does know since his mom was in the wrong....and the both of you need to have a game plan for so this dosent happen again. Is this your husband or boyfriend?

 

[nefertiti]

Yeah she took it....but your s/o is in a tough spot. You're asking him basically to chose between his mom and you....and thats a tough thing to ask a man. A son loves his mom tremendously and to ask to put you over her is not right either. However he should come clean to you if he does know since his mom was in the wrong....and the both of you need to have a game plan for so this dosent happen again. Is this your husband or boyfriend?

Being an enabler for his mom's sticky fingers is not doing HER any favors either. The choice isn't his mom or Vel, because his mom has no legit rock to stand on. If my family wronged my husband you bet your ass I would stand up to them about it. Anyone who knows me knows my dad and I are extremely close, but part of that love I have for him includes knowing when to stand up to him and call him out on his bullshit.

The issue isn't Mom or Velvett. It's "Rock the boat, or ignore it and hope it all goes away so I don't have to risk anyone getting mad at me."