I'm getting conflicting advice... help me sort it out

[fyxgel2]

Okay, I hear multiple ways of advice when it comes to meeting more girls in my life:

Some people say that I need to act more confident (well just about everyone says that actually) and people say that I need to learn tactics, visit sites like sosuave.com and read the Elite Players Guide to Getting Laid, or shit like that. They say I need to put on an act, not act desperate, and act like I dont need the woman, and etc.

Then I hear another group of people saying "Just be yourself. Ignore all of that bullshit, dont bother playing games. These same people tell me not to ask out girls that I just met, and they tell me to just let 'things occur naturally' and that its okay if I only date a few women in my life as long as I find the right one.

I think these views are completely different and also fucked up. Can someone help me out here?

 

[B0ARDIN087]

no offense bro, shut up already

 

[velvett]

Much to your chagrin, I think you need to focus on other areas of your life.

 

[PIGEON-RAT]

Well there's a problem with the first set of advice. Don't "act" anything. BE confident, don't act confident. It's all a state of mind. Don't tear yourself down.

Once you ARE confident, then you can be yourself without any problems.

 

[fyxgel2]

Well there's a problem with the first set of advice. Don't "act" anything. BE confident, don't act confident. It's all a state of mind. Don't tear yourself down.

Once you ARE confident, then you can be yourself without any problems.

well then its a matter of conflicting advice about what I should BE doing...

its still a problem.


velvett,

Like what? what could be more rewarding than getting a woman?

and even if I were to focus on other areas, would that mean would happen to that woman aspect of my life? (or lack thereof)

 

[BileStew]

no offense bro, shut up already

LMAO!!!

 

[velvett]

velvett,

Like what? what could be more rewarding than getting a woman?

and even if I were to focus on other areas, would that mean would happen to that woman aspect of my life? (or lack thereof)

Like what? Your time here, your life is not here for you to get a woman, to get laid and if your lucky receive some unconditional love a respect while you're at it. ( a part not the whole)

Your behavior is read by females as 100% desparate to get laid or loved.

Achievements in other aspects of your life would help create some self-confidence. Life experiences will let you face success and failure, the success will bring you confidence, failure will build your character and both will motivate you.

When you feel better about yourself and have more less typical life experiences you will become more attractive to other people.


If I were a man I'd probably tell you to get laid by a "sure thing" and hope that points you in the right direction.




....but since I'm not a man, you'll have to settle for the above from me.

 

[tiger88]

self tanners bro

use it good

chics dig deep tans

 

[Taps]

foxy, foxy, foxy...

sigh

 

[Gran8Rocks68]

bro listen to velvett not to a guy thats your best bet....

just my 2c

Like what? Your time here, your life is not here for you to get a woman, to get laid and if your lucky receive some unconditional love a respect while you're at it. ( a part not the whole)

Your behavior is read by females as 100% desparate to get laid or loved.

Achievements in other aspects of your life would help create some self-confidence. Life experiences will let you face success and failure, the success will bring you confidence, failure will build your character and both will motivate you.

When you feel better about yourself and have more less typical life experiences you will become more attractive to other people.


If I were a man I'd probably tell you to get laid by a "sure thing" and hope that points you in the right direction.




....but since I'm not a man, you'll have to settle for the above from me.

 

[Ulcasterdropout]

no-hoper

For my bro

 

[fyxgel2]

velvett,

so whats the deal, I'm supposed to focus less on chicks, so that I can become more attractive, and be able to get more chicks in the end?

Or are you just telling me to starve myself away from my desires, and to not think about chicks at all?

I thought the goal in life was to satisfy your desires.

 

[velvett]

velvett,

so whats the deal, I'm supposed to focus less on chicks, so that I can become more attractive, and be able to get more chicks in the end?

Or are you just telling me to starve myself away from my desires, and to not think about chicks at all?

I thought the goal in life was to satisfy your desires.

Yes.

No.

Of course.



Maybe if you were involved in some sort of activities you might be around girls that have the same interests. That way your focusing on your interests and the girls are secondary.

What's a week of your life like?

 

[Deleted member 33117]

LISTEN FUCKTARD! Stop fucking posting, and just ask a fucking girl on a date for Christ sake. You have been analyzing this shit for weeks, and have no even made an effort to ASK a girl on a date. If you were someone I knew in real life, after all of that effort, I would roid rage on you, rip your arm out of the socket and beat you with it. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.......

Rage...subsiding....

Wow, foxygel is one of the few peeps on EF to ever actually make me angry. I want to reach through the computer screen and strange him.

Foxygel, I'm totally convinced you are gay now, btw.

 

[HS Lifter]

to the seduction board!

 

[Deleted member 33117]

Wow, I even called him Fucktard. I reserve that name for people I truely dispise.

 

[fyxgel2]

Yes.

No.

Of course.



Maybe if you were involved in some sort of activities you might be around girls that have the same interests. That way your focusing on your interests and the girls are secondary.

What's a week of your life like?

a week of my life goes like this: (an example from this summer)

Sunday: sleep in, get up at noon. Waste my time on the computer all day, maybe hang out with a friend in the evening, and sometimes I'll go to the gym. go to bed
Monday: Work, come home, nap, go on the computer, go to bed
Tuesday: Work, come home, nap, go on the computer, go to bed
Wednesday: Work, come home, nap, go to church, chill out with church friends afterwards (usually involves watching a movie, playing a board game, playing cards, etc, goin out to eat) go to bed
Thursday: Work, come home, nap, go on the computer, go to bed
Friday: Work, come home, nap, hang out with old buddies from highschool in the evening. we play video games, or talk, and sometimes watch movies, go to bed late.
Saturday: wake up late, go on the computer, do errands, go on the computer, hang out with highschool friends again in the evening probably. go to bed late.

Sunday: the week repeats itself. Maybe I will go to church on Sunday morning sometimes if I have the willpower to get up.

 

[HS Lifter]

ban him

 

[fyxgel2]

LISTEN FUCKTARD! Stop fucking posting, and just ask a fucking girl on a date for Christ sake. You have been analyzing this shit for weeks, and have no even made an effort to ASK a girl on a date. If you were someone I knew in real life, after all of that effort, I would roid rage on you, rip your arm out of the socket and beat you with it. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.......

Rage...subsiding....

Wow, foxygel is one of the few peeps on EF to ever actually make me angry. I want to reach through the computer screen and strange him.

Foxygel, I'm totally convinced you are gay now, btw.

you dont understand, Im so fucking desperate, that any chick can see that, and no chick would want me. I am screwed. Asking out a chick and getting rejected constantly would bury my confidence down even further.

why are you the one thats pissed? Im not even getting any play.

 

[velvett]

a week of my life goes like this: (an example from this summer)

Sunday: sleep in, get up at noon. Waste my time on the computer all day, maybe hang out with a friend in the evening, and sometimes I'll go to the gym. go to bed
Monday: Work, come home, nap, go on the computer, go to bed
Tuesday: Work, come home, nap, go on the computer, go to bed
Wednesday: Work, come home, nap, go to church, chill out with church friends afterwards (usually involves watching a movie, playing a board game, playing cards, etc, goin out to eat) go to bed
Thursday: Work, come home, nap, go on the computer, go to bed
Friday: Work, come home, nap, hang out with old buddies from highschool in the evening. we play video games, or talk, and sometimes watch movies, go to bed late.
Saturday: wake up late, go on the computer, do errands, go on the computer, hang out with highschool friends again in the evening probably. go to bed late.

Sunday: the week repeats itself. Maybe I will go to church on Sunday morning sometimes if I have the willpower to get up.

Clearly you need to nap less and work out more.

What are your interests?

Photography, painting, writing, etc...

 

[Deleted member 33117]

you dont understand, Im so fucking desperate, that any chick can see that, and no chick would want me. I am screwed. Asking out a chick and getting rejected constantly would bury my confidence down even further.

why are you the one thats pissed? Im not even getting any play.

Listen fucktard... ask a girl out... stop bitching about it until you do. I'm not going to give you anymore advice. I'm just going to call you a fag and refer to you as fucktard until you get a date.

On the other hand, we all know that isssue is that you don't actually like girls... stop looking at my avatar...

 

[fyxgel2]

Clearly you need to nap less and work out more.

What are your interests?

Photography, painting, writing, etc...

the sad thing is that I really dont have any interests. i think the only thing that would appeal to me is making out with a hot chick. That is the sad state I have shifted into. I've tried to find interests but none do it for me.

-Books, I hate those.
-Sports, I hate to watch, and most I dont like to play
-Working out, this one I can do, but I usually do it more because I should. not because I want to
-music, i have a limited selection that i enjoy and dont really listen to anything else
-playing music/singing/being in a band - I really wouldnt want to do any of these.
-art - doesnt really do it for me.
-political clubs - i cant find the willpower to care about enough.
-video games - i only enjoy playing with people, when playing by myself it is boring. and a lot of times with ppl it can be boring too, depending on what mood I'm in.

Well, that is the state of my life folks. The few hobbies that I do take part in on my own are:
socializing about nothing, talking on forums, goin on the web, napping, thinking, walking around aimlessly, etc.

oh and I like to watch movies and tv sometimes too, those are fun.

 

[fyxgel2]

Listen fucktard... ask a girl out... stop bitching about it until you do.

So what should I do folks, ask a girl out, or say "forget girls" and try to find hobbies like what velvett wants me to do?

 

[Deleted member 33117]

the sad thing is that I really dont have any interests. i think the only thing that would appeal to me is making out with a hot chick. That is the sad state I have shifted into. I've tried to find interests but none do it for me.

-Books, I hate those.
-Sports, I hate to watch, and most I dont like to play
-Working out, this one I can do, but I usually do it more because I should. not because I want to
-music, i have a limited selection that i enjoy and dont really listen to anything else
-playing music/singing/being in a band - I really wouldnt want to do any of these.
-art - doesnt really do it for me.
-political clubs - i cant find the willpower to care about enough.
-video games - i only enjoy playing with people, when playing by myself it is boring. and a lot of times with ppl it can be boring too, depending on what mood I'm in.

Well, that is the state of my life folks. The few hobbies that I do take part in on my own are:
socializing about nothing, talking on forums, goin on the web, napping, thinking, walking around aimlessly, etc.

oh and I like to watch movies and tv sometimes too, those are fun.

Don't forget taking it up the poopshoot on your list of interests, pillowbiter.

Fucktard, why are you still here and not asking a girl out?

 

[fyxgel2]

Don't forget taking it up the poopshoot on your list of interests, pillowbiter.

Fucktard, why are you still here and not asking a girl out?

------> So what should I do folks, ask a girl out, or say "forget girls" and try to find hobbies like what velvett wants me to do? <------

 

[Ulcasterdropout]

You're caught in a hesitating loop....
You've made no progress. I think people are advising
you to take up activities other then women, just to give your
poor soul a break. You're fucking torturing yourself.
Take a break and reevaluate...

 

[HS Lifter]

.

 

[fyxgel2]

so velvett, what do you say... do you think I should just break the hesitating loop and ask some chicks out, or do you think I should just say "screw it" and find some other hobbies.

Do you guys actually think that some chicks might say "yes" (if I ask enough out)

Or do I need to get a life before I have any hope of any chicks saying yes to me.

 

[HS Lifter]

so velvett, what do you say... do you think I should just break the hesitating loop and ask some chicks out, or do you think I should just say "screw it" and find some other hobbies.

Do you guys actually think that some chicks might say "yes" (if I ask enough out)

Or do I need to get a life before I have any hope of any chicks saying yes to me.

I havent paid attention to your threads, but havent the guys answered all these questions already?

Are your friends losers and virgins as well?

 

[fyxgel2]

I havent paid attention to your threads, but havent the guys answered all these questions already?

Are your friends losers and virgins as well?

no, and the reason why they havent answered them all is because I have WAY TOO MANY QUESTIONS!

no, a couple of them aint. (but they both have only had sex with one girl)
and they other 2 aint losers but they are still virgins, like me.

 

[HS Lifter]

no, and the reason why they havent answered them all is because I have WAY TOO MANY QUESTIONS!

no, a couple of them aint. (but they both have only had sex with one girl)
and they other 2 aint losers but they are still virgins, like me.

do you live at home?

If your have your own place, throw parties everynight, get drunk, be an obnoxious drunken asshole and hit on all the chicks.

It works.

 

[fyxgel2]

do you live at home?

If your have your own place, throw parties everynight, get drunk, be an obnoxious drunken asshole and hit on all the chicks.

It works.

I live in a townhouse, where alcohol is prohibited because I live on a Christian campus. I could get kicked out of the dorms if I was caught for that.

I live with 6 other people. There is not even a lock on my room door.

 

[Deleted member 33117]

http://www.elitefitness.com/forum/showthread.php?t=339842

Foxygel, read this. Now why can't you do that?

 

[The Greatest]

jesus loves you

 

[fyxgel2]

http://www.elitefitness.com/forum/showthread.php?t=339842

Foxygel, read this. Now why can't you do that?

first you have to convince the girl to have sex with you.

 

[Deleted member 33117]

first you have to convince the girl to have sex with you.

Exactally. And this is not going to happen because you have never asked a girl out, Fucktard.

 

[fyxgel2]

Exactally. And this is not going to happen because you have never asked a girl out, Fucktard.

Asking a girl out, is kind of like trying to mug someone.
You either get their goodies, or you get your ass kicked.

If you are an unskilled fighter like me, you can probably guess which one would happen.

 

[The Greatest]

bro you need to start with a girl your comfortable with. Try a mock date with someone who is a close friend. This worked great for me when I was really shy, see I new one girl who would never reject me. And sure enough we went out had a great time, and get this after a few drinks we were all over each other, I ever scored that night for the first time. Thanks mom!

 

[V-Machine]

This guy has got to be having a laugh...........he is winding you all up!!

 

[Debaser]

Abandon Christ.

Embrace drugs.

 

[jackangel]

he is like some Internet forum manifestation of Absurdity. not just an example of absurdity, but he is Absurdity itself. like other personifications of abstract concepts, he is not to be trifled with.

and by the way, i'm pretty sure jesus wouldn't like him either.

 

[KA-BAR]

Jesus Christ give the guy a break. lmao. To bad you don’t live in Ohio bro I would take you out and find you a slut for the night. lol Here is my opinion. Most woman like rebels. Go out and get some tattoos, stick your hat on backwards, grow some wild facial hair and do something to get some PR like take up a real sport like NHB and power lifting. Body definitely helps. Pack on a lot of mass and get a tan. Also it’s who you hang out with. Take 3-4 of your friends who are smooth with woman out.. Don’t go out with to many friends because that will scare them. Buy a seduction book also.. Also stop being a coward. I flirt with everyone and very outgoing. A lot of girls tell me to fuck off when I tell them they have nice tits but other eat it up. Go out and don’t be afraid to ask chicks to dance. Drink some liquid courage and ask some chicks to dance. Hell I am white and cannot dance for shit but I get my white ass out there and just try to follow what the brothers do. lol

 

[Robert Jan]

This is not a conflict. You can be confident AND sincere. In order to do this you must learn to like yourself. This is a requirement for almost anything that is cool in life, not just meeting girls.

You know what you can't break up with or not hang out anymore with yourself you might as well make life easier and nicer by taking a liking to yourself.

You can start with the relationship between your phallus and your right hand.

 

[KA-BAR]

You can start with the relationship between your phallus and your right hand.

 

[crew9]

Jesus Christ give the guy a break. lmao. To bad you don’t live in Ohio bro I would take you out and find you a slut for the night. lol Here is my opinion. Most woman like rebels. Go out and get some tattoos, stick your hat on backwards, grow some wild facial hair and do something to get some PR like take up a real sport like NHB and power lifting. Body definitely helps. Pack on a lot of mass and get a tan. Also it’s who you hang out with. Take 3-4 of your friends who are smooth with woman out.. Don’t go out with to many friends because that will scare them. Buy a seduction book also.. Also stop being a coward. I flirt with everyone and very outgoing. A lot of girls tell me to fuck off when I tell them they have nice tits but other eat it up. Go out and don’t be afraid to ask chicks to dance. Drink some liquid courage and ask some chicks to dance. Hell I am white and cannot dance for shit but I get my white ass out there and just try to follow what the brothers do. lol

I don't know if you've seen how many posts this brolly makes about this stuff. Looking for advice but never following it etc.

 

[crew9]

------> So what should I do folks, ask a girl out, or say "forget girls" and try to find hobbies like what velvett wants me to do? <------

Listen to both people. Velvett is giving trying to help you become a better, happy human being. The other people are trying to help you get a girl. Focus on being happy with yourself and by yourself and the rest will follow.

 

[Deleted member 33117]

I don't know if you've seen how many posts this brolly makes about this stuff. Looking for advice but never following it etc.

Exactally. I for one have given him at least 50 replies some of them longer than the one you just quoted. JerseyArt, Superdave and even Dawgmo have all wasted hours reading and answering his questions for weeks, and he has not even TRIED to ask a girl out yet.

He is either a fucking pathetic loser who has some serious issues, or an alter who is yanking our chains.

 

[Ish]

Since I have no interest to read any of this,

http://www.eros-guide.com/map/?CMP=ILC-Eroscom

Find your city and go nuts.

 

[nimbus]

You either get their goodies, or you get your ass kicked.

LOL...alter.

 

[bran987]

LOL...alter.

 

[fyxgel2]

bro you need to start with a girl your comfortable with. Try a mock date with someone who is a close friend. This worked great for me when I was really shy, see I new one girl who would never reject me. And sure enough we went out had a great time, and get this after a few drinks we were all over each other, I ever scored that night for the first time. Thanks mom!

um... i did a mock date once with a girl who was a friend.
But believe me, I had NO desire to make out with her or get on her or any of that.

Sure there are probably many girls who will say yes to me, the problem is that I am not interested in any of them. The girls I am interested in will say no to me. funny how that works.

 

[fyxgel2]

This guy has got to be having a laugh...........he is winding you all up!!

Its comments like these that make people doubt whether or not I am a real person. I am not laughing right now.

 

[fyxgel2]

Jesus Christ give the guy a break. lmao. To bad you don’t live in Ohio bro I would take you out and find you a slut for the night. lol Here is my opinion. Most woman like rebels. Go out and get some tattoos, stick your hat on backwards, grow some wild facial hair and do something to get some PR like take up a real sport like NHB and power lifting. Body definitely helps. Pack on a lot of mass and get a tan. Also it’s who you hang out with. Take 3-4 of your friends who are smooth with woman out.. Don’t go out with to many friends because that will scare them. Buy a seduction book also.. Also stop being a coward. I flirt with everyone and very outgoing. A lot of girls tell me to fuck off when I tell them they have nice tits but other eat it up. Go out and don’t be afraid to ask chicks to dance. Drink some liquid courage and ask some chicks to dance. Hell I am white and cannot dance for shit but I get my white ass out there and just try to follow what the brothers do. lol

about the part about friends. non of my current friends want to take part in any macking on chicks. THey are all dumb. I would go out and find some friends that would like to do this, but they are hard to find, and I suck at making friends, I really do.

For some reason people just arent interested in being a genuine friend to me.

 

[fyxgel2]

This is not a conflict. You can be confident AND sincere. In order to do this you must learn to like yourself. This is a requirement for almost anything that is cool in life, not just meeting girls.

You know what you can't break up with or not hang out anymore with yourself you might as well make life easier and nicer by taking a liking to yourself.

i suppose if I cant get with a girl or even with some friends, maybe I should just get used to hanging out with myself.

In the mean time, I suppose I can do what velvett says and focus on other things, and maybe if I get some balls, maybe I will ask out a girl.

But ironically I would rather just spend all my time asking out girls. Funny how I dont live by my words though.

 

[-SD-]

Sergeant Hartman: "Foxygel has dishonered himself, and dishonered EF. I have tried to help him but I have failed. I have failed because you people have not given foxygel the proper motivation. So whenever foxygel fucks up, I will not punish him, I will punish all of you, so the way I see it you owe me 50 pushups now on your faces!"
Foxygel is the official Private Pyle of EF.

 

[ringperm]

Would it really be the end of your world if you get rejected a few times? Everybody gets rejected from time to time, even celebrities. Who cares, just move on, and don’t take it personal. Life's too short to worry about trivial matters.

But if you want to get a girl interested in you, you have to be interesting to
her. And from what I read previously, when you displayed a typical normal week for you, there is nothing interesting about you. Having a life that consists of work, sleep, computing etc is no life at all. It's a waste of time. You have to evolve yourself, enlighten yourself somehow. Make an effort. Just because something sounds boring at first, doesn't mean that it has to be, once you get the hang of it. Start climbing at an indoor climbing facility (or whatever you call it over there) for instance, take dance lessons. You'd be amazed how many gorgeous women goes to these classes, and how few guys does. The ratio is probably 10:1, and every guy that shows up, will be sought after.

I maybe wrong here, but my impression of you, after reading quite a few of your posts, tells me that you probably are quite a bit lazy. I bet you don't take much pride in your appearance, and that’s a mistake.

This has probably been said before, but I think it's worth saying again. Get a nice haircut, and a nice tan. Go shopping for some decent clothing, and a few pairs of good looking shoes. Wear a nice cologne. Spend some money on yourself. If you look like something fresh out of the tumble dryer, your chances for female attention are minimal. But if you make an effort, girls will notice that, and making an effort is a nice quality (but don't overdo it).

Do not try to change into something that's not you, but rather try to improve the person that you already are. You like most people in here, is a normal person. And as a normal person you don't have to be extraordinary to attract attention. If everybody was extraordinary, extraordinary would be normal.

Using humour and common sense will get you far, everybody loves a man with a sense of humour. If you don't have any, steal from those that have. EF is packed with people with a great sense of humour. Steal what you can, I'm sure they won't mind. And if they do, who cares


If I have understood American culture correctly, going on a date, doesn't necessarily mean that you have to be madly in love with one another. It's more like getting to know each other, and take it from there. Why don't you ask a girl that your not necessarily attracted to, but whose company you like nonetheless. Practise your dating skills with her, evolve your conversational skills. Teach yourself how to talk to women, by using women you’re not afraid of. And when you’re ready, take it to the next level. Be patient, and don't aim for the sky too soon.

Ok, this was probably allot of senseless rambling, but I just had to get it of my chest. If there's something your afraid to do out there, do it anyway. Start small, and work your way upwards.
I’m gonna shut up now, my English isn’t good enough to support posts of this magnitude, and I feel I have already overextended myself on this one. Good luck anyway.

 

[fyxgel2]

Do not try to change into something that's not you, but rather try to improve the person that you already are. You like most people in here, is a normal person. And as a normal person you don't have to be extraordinary to attract attention. If everybody was extraordinary, extraordinary would be normal.

Improving yourself, so that you can be more attractive to someone else, is the same thing as changing yourself for someone else, and I consider that not being yourself.

If you change yourself it should be for you. Not to impress some chick or some people.


I will practice talking to uglier chicks I think. Just because I may need to do so. we'll see, in any case I hope to mack on some girls today. Today is a good day for it. no classes until tomorrow.

 

[-SD-]

Improving yourself, so that you can be more attractive to someone else, is the same thing as changing yourself for someone else, and I consider that not being yourself.

If you change yourself it should be for you. Not to impress some chick or some people.


I will practice talking to uglier chicks I think. Just because I may need to do so. we'll see, in any case I hope to mack on some girls today. Today is a good day for it. no classes until tomorrow.

Newsflash: if everyone remained themselves 100% everyone would be out of shape, lazy, messy, boring fat slobs. If each one of us lived on our very own deserted island then its ok, but "no man is an island". So in reality chicks dont go for that shit, so you better get used to getting out of your comfort zone and improving your life not only for chicks but for yourself because people in general will think better of you.