I am not understanding your questions. Who is saying that you must accept anyone? Drop this collective consensus bullshit of PC-ness. This is your life, your decision of a partner, and therefore they must meet your criteria. If they fail in the looks department, and this is important to you, then it is your right not to accept them. "Love" or "attraction" is about finding one who is a reflection of your ideals, of your beliefs, of your values, this is what one is "attracted" to, what one falls in "love" with. It is subjective.
But it is a reciprocal effect, you will have to have the same effect on them, also.