How to jack off an Elephant. Not a joke.

[rsnoble-im-back]

I learned about this from the zookeepers at the Kansas City Zoo.

First off, it takes 3 people. In this case they are all guys.

The first thing you have to do is lure the elephant into a stall.

Guy #1 gets on a ladder and whispers sweet nothings into the elephants ear, gently stroking the side of his face and ear while he whispers.

While this is going on guy #2 pulls a surgical arm glove up to his elbow, climbs up a ladder behind the elephant and gently massages the elephants asshole until it loosens up. Upon which point he will insert his entire arm, locate the elephant's prostate, and gently massage it.

Guy # 3, God bless his soul, stands underneath the elephant with a 5 gallon bucket.

This isn't a joke, it's real life stuff. So if you ever thought your job sucked....

The best part of this is that I was told the elephant was real pissy the first time. Ever since the first time the elephant now gets excited and enters the stall at freewill. LOL.

Sorry, don't visit EF very often anymore. Thought I my as well make it count.

 

[youngguns]

How much comes out

 

[wootoom]

thanks for the tip

 

[rsnoble-im-back]

How much comes out

I can't recall that. I don't think it was as much as one might think if I recall. Keep in mind it would be hard to catch something out of 4' cock even if it were a small amount if you were using a teaspoon.

 

[Mr. dB]

Does this mean the elephant is queer?

Do they make elephant-size butt-plugs?

 

[b0und]

Just when I thought you couldn't possibly make a thread geigher than pick3...


b0und (got pwned again)

 

[redsamurai]

well I'm sure this information will certainly come in handy one day........

 

[heatherrae]

Oh that is what we were doing wrong last weekend....

thanks

 

[feisty11975]

well thanks for this very educational thread. I am sure this information will be of use someday in my lifetime. hahaha

 

[redsamurai]

Oh that is what we were doing wrong last weekend....

thanks

you like to fist guys??............ heatherrae........

 

[musclemom]

I learned about this from the zookeepers at the Kansas City Zoo.

First off, it takes 3 people. In this case they are all guys.

The first thing you have to do is lure the elephant into a stall.

Guy #1 gets on a ladder and whispers sweet nothings into the elephants ear, gently stroking the side of his face and ear while he whispers.

While this is going on guy #2 pulls a surgical arm glove up to his elbow, climbs up a ladder behind the elephant and gently massages the elephants asshole until it loosens up. Upon which point he will insert his entire arm, locate the elephant's prostate, and gently massage it.

Guy # 3, God bless his soul, stands underneath the elephant with a 5 gallon bucket.

This isn't a joke, it's real life stuff. So if you ever thought your job sucked....

The best part of this is that I was told the elephant was real pissy the first time. Ever since the first time the elephant now gets excited and enters the stall at freewill. LOL.

Sorry, don't visit EF very often anymore. Thought I my as well make it count.

Elephants have prostates?! I guess they do, I just never thought about it. Holy shit you really do learn something new every day.

I dunno, I guess it's all in your perspective as to which job is worse (Guy #2 or #3). Personally I think being armpit deep in elephant asshole massaging the beast's prostate in the interest of perpetuating the species definitely qualifies as services above and beyond the call of duty.

 

[heatherrae]

you like to fist guys??............ heatherrae........

No, I didn't fist my elephant. I was just trying a handjob, but his weiner was too big. Now I know!

 

[ksharp01]

Elephants have prostates?! I guess they do, I just never thought about it. Holy shit you really do learn something new every day.

I dunno, I guess it's all in your perspective as to which job is worse (Guy #2 or #3). Personally I think being armpit deep in elephant asshole massaging the beast's prostate in the interest of perpetuating the species definitely qualifies as services above and beyond the call of duty.

lol

I don't think that I will ever want to try that bit of information...um, yeah thanks for posting that for us

 

[redsamurai]

No, I didn't fist my elephant. I was just trying a handjob, but his weiner was too big. Now I know!

so you neglect his prostate completely?

 

[CO B-man]

The best part of this is that I was told the elephant was real pissy the first time. Ever since the first time the elephant now gets excited and enters the stall at freewill. LOL.

It is said that an Elephant NEVER forgets!

 

[Mr. dB]

Elephants have prostates?! I guess they do, I just never thought about it. Holy shit you really do learn something new every day.

They're mammals. We all work pretty much the same way.