Helping a Mom that is Desperate! Please .

[ark94]

Before I get into my post, I know I’m a guy posting in here, but my mom doesn’t use the computer much, so im doing this for her. Please don’t ban me for posting here, if you have any questions please message me, and I can ask her or answer myself whatever you ladies would like.

Hey everybody, so some of you may know me or not, I have been doing great with my program, but as my knowledge increases etc, my mom really looks to me for help with herself, her diet, and her body.
So my mom is I guess obese, not like freaking obese obese, but big enough. She was in an accident well over 3 years ago I would say, or more and she has never been the same. Her back problems have not gone away and suffers every day, also her diet is bad, but I am going to get her eating sort of the same way I do, or I am just going to post in the diet section. Something you may want to know, is that she works nights. So she comes home at 7 in the morning, sleeps from 8 till 11 or 12, then is up until 6:30 or 7, sleeps until 10 and goes to work for 11.
Weight: 245lb
Height: 5”4
Had to pry that out of her she is very insecure about her weight, never told anyone but me.
So, lets get onto what I can help her do. She is very stiff, and has bad knees, but I and she does also want to help herself lose weight. Muscle loss doesn’t matter, she doesn’t have much muscle and whatever weight loss is good fast I guess for her, or what you suggest. She can’t be lifting weights right now, and running is hard, and biking etc.
I would say that getting her on walking is best. What distance should she be starting at? Also, anything you suggest as complexes? Easy complexes? Something other than walking that might be interesting.
Onto, her diet. What do you suggest her to start dieting as? My diet is cutting, and its very clean high protein, medium carbs, and low fats. Should I get her eating exactly what I do? Or are woman different when it comes to the amount of food :S she is not a bodybuilder or does not intend on, so I guess fat loss is the main goal, muscle loss again like I stated before to her doesn’t matter much, aslong as she can lose weight. She wants to drop 50lb’s by December if thats possible?
May have forgotten to add stuff, but pleaseeee can you help me help her =D I really do care, and im going to be strict with her =D to get her to eat properly from now on. Also I will be a personal trainer to her when it comes to exercise, so help me out there to.

Thanks!!!!

 

[needtogetaas]

First off welcome to the forums and have a free plat on me.

 

[needtogetaas]

ok never mind some one ggave you one already lol. Hey i tried though

 

[needtogetaas]

Before I get into my post, I know I’m a guy posting in here, but my mom doesn’t use the computer much, so im doing this for her. Please don’t ban me for posting here, if you have any questions please message me, and I can ask her or answer myself whatever you ladies would like.

Hey everybody, so some of you may know me or not, I have been doing great with my program, but as my knowledge increases etc, my mom really looks to me for help with herself, her diet, and her body.
So my mom is I guess obese, not like freaking obese obese, but big enough. She was in an accident well over 3 years ago I would say, or more and she has never been the same. Her back problems have not gone away and suffers every day, also her diet is bad, but I am going to get her eating sort of the same way I do, or I am just going to post in the diet section. Something you may want to know, is that she works nights. So she comes home at 7 in the morning, sleeps from 8 till 11 or 12, then is up until 6:30 or 7, sleeps until 10 and goes to work for 11.
Weight: 245lb
Height: 5”4
Had to pry that out of her she is very insecure about her weight, never told anyone but me.
So, lets get onto what I can help her do. She is very stiff, and has bad knees, but I and she does also want to help herself lose weight. Muscle loss doesn’t matter, she doesn’t have much muscle and whatever weight loss is good fast I guess for her, or what you suggest. She can’t be lifting weights right now, and running is hard, and biking etc.
I would say that getting her on walking is best. What distance should she be starting at? Also, anything you suggest as complexes? Easy complexes? Something other than walking that might be interesting.
Onto, her diet. What do you suggest her to start dieting as? My diet is cutting, and its very clean high protein, medium carbs, and low fats. Should I get her eating exactly what I do? Or are woman different when it comes to the amount of food :S she is not a bodybuilder or does not intend on, so I guess fat loss is the main goal, muscle loss again like I stated before to her doesn’t matter much, aslong as she can lose weight. She wants to drop 50lb’s by December if thats possible?
May have forgotten to add stuff, but pleaseeee can you help me help her =D I really do care, and im going to be strict with her =D to get her to eat properly from now on. Also I will be a personal trainer to her when it comes to exercise, so help me out there to.

Thanks!!!!

My friend right now I think it is best you just start easing her into a new life stile. Talk to her about cleaning up her diet, cooking all her own foods. Adding more veggies and meat to her diet. Get her to start becoming more aware of the cals she is taking in. Tell her about programs like fitday.com and get her using them.

Then have her get more into walking. like 2-3 times a week 2-3 miles at a time along with 2-3 good full body works outs each week. 2-3 sets per major muscle group and 10 sets each.

It sounds to me like she just needs to " start". This can often be the hardest part. Get her started on this and in like 3-4 weeks when she has been doing a simple work out and diet then you can start to fine tune it more. She just needs to get started.

I know for a fact she will get more out of this if she comes to the forum her self.

 

[SpyWizard]

moderate exercise on a frequent basis, and a low glycemic diet will do the trick..

now with that said.. I would insist that you make her see a doctor for sure, every see a person have a stroke?? i have, my mom at my house just after my wedding.. it's not a good thing..

low glycemic, and do all the shopping for her as a 1st step, that way it takes the responsibility and temptations out of her hands

 

[superqt4u2nv]

Before I get into my post, I know I’m a guy posting in here, but my mom doesn’t use the computer much, so im doing this for her. Please don’t ban me for posting here, if you have any questions please message me, and I can ask her or answer myself whatever you ladies would like.

Hey everybody, so some of you may know me or not, I have been doing great with my program, but as my knowledge increases etc, my mom really looks to me for help with herself, her diet, and her body.
So my mom is I guess obese, not like freaking obese obese, but big enough. She was in an accident well over 3 years ago I would say, or more and she has never been the same. Her back problems have not gone away and suffers every day, also her diet is bad, but I am going to get her eating sort of the same way I do, or I am just going to post in the diet section. Something you may want to know, is that she works nights. So she comes home at 7 in the morning, sleeps from 8 till 11 or 12, then is up until 6:30 or 7, sleeps until 10 and goes to work for 11.
Weight: 245lb
Height: 5”4
Had to pry that out of her she is very insecure about her weight, never told anyone but me.
So, lets get onto what I can help her do. She is very stiff, and has bad knees, but I and she does also want to help herself lose weight. Muscle loss doesn’t matter, she doesn’t have much muscle and whatever weight loss is good fast I guess for her, or what you suggest. She can’t be lifting weights right now, and running is hard, and biking etc.
I would say that getting her on walking is best. What distance should she be starting at? Also, anything you suggest as complexes? Easy complexes? Something other than walking that might be interesting.
Onto, her diet. What do you suggest her to start dieting as? My diet is cutting, and its very clean high protein, medium carbs, and low fats. Should I get her eating exactly what I do? Or are woman different when it comes to the amount of food :S she is not a bodybuilder or does not intend on, so I guess fat loss is the main goal, muscle loss again like I stated before to her doesn’t matter much, aslong as she can lose weight. She wants to drop 50lb’s by December if thats possible?
May have forgotten to add stuff, but pleaseeee can you help me help her =D I really do care, and im going to be strict with her =D to get her to eat properly from now on. Also I will be a personal trainer to her when it comes to exercise, so help me out there to.

Thanks!!!!

She needs to be lifting weights and she needs muscle. The reason is simple muscle burns more calories the more muscle she has the more calories she burns and the more fat she will lose so she needs to lift weight as well as doing cardio. At her current weight most any changes she makes are going to make a big diffrence. Does she have access to a gym? This will determine what kind of exercise plan I can suggest for her.

Daily calorie intake should be about 2450 eating 5-6 small meals a day

Diet wise start with a ratio of
40% Protein
30% carbs
30% fats (good fats)

Stop eating carbs after 6 p.m.

She should be getting a gallon of water in a day you can also drink green tea decaf and other decaf herbal teas as much as you like.

These are approved foods (if it is not on the list you shouldn’t be eating it)

• Turkey skinless breast
• Chicken skinless breast
• Fish
• Lean beef
• Buffalo
• Egg whites
• Omega eggs
• Skim milk
• Low-fat cottage cheese
• Wild-game meat
• ezekiel bread
• Sweet potato
• Steamed brown rice
• Oatmeal
• Barley
• Beans
• Kidney beans
• blueberries
• Strawberries
• Greek yogurt
• Broccoli
• Asparagus
• Lettuce
• Cauliflower
• Green beans
• peppers
• Mushrooms
• Spinach
• Cabbage
• Celery
• Zucchini
• Cucumber
• Onion
• Avocado
• Sunflower seeds
• Pumpkin seeds
• Natural Peanut Butter
• dry roasted peanuts unsalted
• raw almonds and almond oil
• walnuts and walnut oil
• macadamia nuts and oil
• sesame oil
• Olives and olive oil
• Flax seed and flax seed oil

 

[ark94]

Needto, im going to try and get her on here. but she does not have time. Thats why im doing it for her, ill try and see if she can get on here, because indeed, she will get a lot more out of it. Oh and about full body workouts, what do you mean? Lifting weights? Again she cannot lift weights right off the bad, and doesn't intend to, how about something like complexes?

Spywizard, here is the thing. I eat very healthy during my cutting diet, and she buys all the foods, meats, vegetables, and cooks my my meals except breakfast. She knows how to eat, but she just doesn't eat the same way. easily she can eat what i eat, and then it we would be eating the same. I shop with her, and we choose the foods, however my brother and dad eat a shit load of junk food, drink a lot of pop, atleast a can a day, and drink beer. My dad eats whatever is made, so he is somewhat healthier (never drank more than 1 cup of water in a day though) and my brother has gone from being skinny before college, to putting on a lot of weight by eating like just fucking shit, its ridiculous.

My mom however can eat like me, so if i posted my diet, would you be able to say that is good for her or not? Or should she have something completely different.

 

[ark94]

She needs to be lifting weights and she needs muscle. The reason is simple muscle burns more calories the more muscle she has the more calories she burns and the more fat she will lose so she needs to lift weight as well as doing cardio. At her current weight most any changes she makes are going to make a big diffrence. Does she have access to a gym? This will determine what kind of exercise plan I can suggest for her.

Daily calorie intake should be about 2450 eating 5-6 small meals a day

Diet wise start with a ratio of
40% Protein
30% carbs
30% fats (good fats)

Stop eating carbs after 6 p.m.

She should be getting a gallon of water in a day you can also drink green tea decaf and other decaf herbal teas as much as you like.

These are approved foods (if it is not on the list you shouldn’t be eating it)

• Turkey skinless breast
• Chicken skinless breast
• Fish
• Lean beef
• Buffalo
• Egg whites
• Omega eggs
• Skim milk
• Low-fat cottage cheese
• Wild-game meat
• ezekiel bread
• Sweet potato
• Steamed brown rice
• Oatmeal
• Barley
• Beans
• Kidney beans
• blueberries
• Strawberries
• Greek yogurt
• Broccoli
• Asparagus
• Lettuce
• Cauliflower
• Green beans
• peppers
• Mushrooms
• Spinach
• Cabbage
• Celery
• Zucchini
• Cucumber
• Onion
• Avocado
• Sunflower seeds
• Pumpkin seeds
• Natural Peanut Butter
• dry roasted peanuts unsalted
• raw almonds and almond oil
• walnuts and walnut oil
• macadamia nuts and oil
• sesame oil
• Olives and olive oil
• Flax seed and flax seed oil

Hey thanks. Well, she does have access to the gym, and i know that more muscle burns more calories, in turn fat. Right now though she just wants to lose fat, she has no hope. So she doesn't think its possible, i will definitely get her into the gym, but she won't right now. Which is why im asking about anything at home, complexes, something with dumbells maybe? I have 10lb dumbells, 20lb, or 25lb dumbells. What can she do with that?

As far as water goes, she drinks a lot. Atleast 2L a day. Also drinks a lot of green tea/herbal tea all the time =D

 

[superqt4u2nv]

Hey thanks. Well, she does have access to the gym, and i know that more muscle burns more calories, in turn fat. Right now though she just wants to lose fat, she has no hope. So she doesn't think its possible, i will definitely get her into the gym, but she won't right now. Which is why im asking about anything at home, complexes, something with dumbells maybe? I have 10lb dumbells, 20lb, or 25lb dumbells. What can she do with that?

As far as water goes, she drinks a lot. Atleast 2L a day. Also drinks a lot of green tea/herbal tea all the time =D

2 liters is a good start but really needs to be closer to 4 liters. She wont lose fat only if she is not lifting weights she will lose muscle and in the long run that will hurt her more then anything she will end up being skinny fat. She will weight less but have the exact same body compostion still be mushy and gooey.

I would have her start out with a 3 day weight lifting split listed here http://www.elitefitness.com/forum/w...raining/different-training-splits-688475.html then have her do 30 minute hit cardio 3 days a week perferably on her off days from lifting but if that is not possible then right after lifting. For cardio have her stick to elepticals less pressure on her knees etc.

 

[needtogetaas]

We got a great Family here who love helping others man. Its the best place for you and your mom man.

 

[SouthernLord]

Ark, make her get a physical before starting any serious physical activity. 20 minutes of walking around the neighborhood would be a great start and she could easily build upon that. She has to get active.

I know your diet She could practically follow it to a tee and I bet she would start dropping weight. She prepares all your meals now. All she would have to do is prepare double portions.

A regular sleep schedule (7-8 continuous hours) would be a big help for her too.

 

[ark94]

Ark, make her get a physical before starting any serious physical activity. 20 minutes of walking around the neighborhood would be a great start and she could easily build upon that. She has to get active.

I know your diet She could practically follow it to a tee and I bet she would start dropping weight. She prepares all your meals now. All she would have to do is prepare double portions.

A regular sleep schedule (7-8 continuous hours) would be a big help for her too.

Thanks Southern, i know for sure i am starting her up with cardio atleast 2 times a week, just walking and then progress to 5times a week.

So you think she can follow my diet? I told my mom that, and she said she could except for breakfast, that 4 eggs would be too much.

Also, i come to this new question. I said before she works nights, comes home and sleeps from 8 till whenever she wakes up. (her set pattern has been waking up between 12-1) Then she stays up until 6 or 7, and sleeps until 10 and goes to work for 11. She doesn't work like that everyday day, she works 3 on, 2 days off, then 2 on, 3 off and rotates.

So she asked me this morning, when she comes home in the morning at 7, i will make her the same breakfast as i eat, but should she eat before she goes to sleep? That was her main question because i have heard, and she said that it isn't good to eat before bed, so can she eat that at 7, then sleep at 8? Or eat that breakfast at 12? when she wakes up? OR, should she eat it before going to work? Because she is up the most then? Any idea on how to set this up?

 

[Rebecca D]

I struggle with my parents weight as well. No matter what I told them in the past they would not change their lifestyles. I finally started visiting them more often (they live about two hours away) and started walking with them. I also got in the kitchen with them. I found that they are much more receptive to my actions than my words. If you can, make time to walk with her and eat as many meals as possible with her. That should help motivate her. See if you can get any of her friends to walk with her as well. Once you get her on a better diet and regular walks during the week then you can move toward more advanced workouts.

Rebecca D

 

[ark94]

I struggle with my parents weight as well. No matter what I told them in the past they would not change their lifestyles. I finally started visiting them more often (they live about two hours away) and started walking with them. I also got in the kitchen with them. I found that they are much more receptive to my actions than my words. If you can, make time to walk with her and eat as many meals as possible with her. That should help motivate her. See if you can get any of her friends to walk with her as well. Once you get her on a better diet and regular walks during the week then you can move toward more advanced workouts.

Rebecca D

Thanks Rebecca! Well i have realized that if i sit down and eat with my mom she will eat the same as me. Only thing is, i go to school all day, and don't come home until dinner. So i have no idea how to make my mom eat the 5 meals she is supposed to eat at home if she doesn't have somebody to sit down and eat with. And she doesn't even want to eat the same portions as me, and my diet would suit her perfect. (Btw, southern im going to send you a message about that).

I try and get my mom to walk as much as possible, instead of her saying she is too tired from now on, i am just going to have to get her to walk. We live out in the country, and there is nobody she knows here, everybody is like 45minutes away at minimum that she knows, most of them live in another city. So i try and walk with her as much as possible.

It sucks seeing my mom like this, she just needs that kick start like everyone has been saying to get her going with the diet and walking. Need to find out a way to get this for her, any tips?

Also, any idea on how to get her to eat the way i do? I am doing a very clean and strict cutting diet, and it would fit her great. But she says she can't have 4 eggs because she has high cholestrol, and she can't have the 4-6oz. of meat, only 2-3oz. because she doesn't want to gain weight... but my calories sit at around 1700-2000 each day. That would be more than enough for her, but i don't know how to convince her to eat the same portions. Going to try and sit down with her after school today and tell her why and show her some stuff on here about why its important.

 

[Rebecca D]

A lot of it is going to be trial and error. Different things motivate different people. The way I get my kids to eat healthy is controlling what comes in the house. No sodas, pop tarts, or chips. If it is not in the house she can't eat it. Of course that is easier with kids versus a full grown woman.

Rebecca D

 

[trex74]

A lot of it is going to be trial and error. Different things motivate different people. The way I get my kids to eat healthy is controlling what comes in the house. No sodas, pop tarts, or chips. If it is not in the house she can't eat it. Of course that is easier with kids versus a full grown woman.

Rebecca D

+1

This is also how I control mySELF...if it's not around, I am not tempted...I am of the sort of person that if I eat a little bit of something "bad", I eat a lot...so cookies, chips, sweets, etc. etc.
Just. Not. Allowed.
lol it's the only way for me.

 

[slat1]

I think just getting out there with your mom walking and talking will be something she enjoys. Then once she notices it is making a difference her self confidence will increase along with her motivation.
You are doing a great thing!

 

[ark94]

Thanks everyone. So today i come home and find out she didn't follow anything. I really have to get her to motivate herself to eat while im at school every 2 hours, as opposed to big lunches.

Also about the food in the house, my dad and bro just bitch like no tomorrow if there isn't any junk in the house. So its not even possible. I myself though, i have mad willpower and i make cookies, cakes and stuff and don't even come close to licking the spoon, i would never even eat something junk. I just need to get my mom to be the same, but its hard. During the summer holidays i know i am going to be able to be a shit load more strict, but how can i get her to eat while im at school.... :S

Also, how many times should she start walking a week, after literally no exercise for sooo long. I was planning on at minimum 2 days the first week, when she is off work, then 3 days the next, and gradually work up to walking everyday in a month or so?