God on steroids

[Nathan]

I went to my anthropology lecture tonight and my prof showed a slide of a Michelangelo painting and commented that God looked like he used steroids. I jumped out of my seat and screamed, "Hell yeah God juices. He's jacked and you all fucking know it. What? Lobsters juice too and that's why they can pincer right through bone and shit. I wish i had pincers instead of hands so that I could pinch through thick steel bars and all that jazz. If I had my way, I'd also have hooves instead of feet just cause hooves are bad ass." I was then promptly escorted from the builiding since I gather I removed all my clothing during my ranting though I don't recall that ever happening. Anyways, if my anthropology prof says God juices you know it must be true since those guys don't lie. Furthermore, where is the platypus indigenous to?

 

[HappyScrappy]

the platyous is indigenous to Australia, although its habitat is getting fucked up there because they keep intoducing new animals to wipe out other new animals that they have beeen bringing in.

as for Michelangelo and steroids, all people in his Sistine Chapel paintings were jacked - even the women were modeled after jacked dudes.

and michelangelo was gay.
don't know about god though.

 

[Nathan]

SCientists have been plagued by the question of God's sexuality for centuries. Just when they think they have him figured out he does something like pork a dolphin and mix us all up again. Science has pretty much established that he's a necrophiliac at least. Good for them.
I like pants. They are a very strange garment though you have to admit. Why did they make them with two holes for both legs instead of just keep it simple and make pants look like the dress? That question haunts me every day and I wonder who it was that invented pants. I'm not sure if I'd like to shake his hand or rabbit punch him in the testicles. Maybe if I ever meet him I'll just come to a compromise and staple his hand to his choda. Yes, that will do nicely.

 

[Nathan]

I can't help but notice that I'm being neglected over here and frankly if I don't get some attnetion pretty damn soon I'm gonna start urinating on things that shouldn't be urinated on.

 

[HappyScrappy]

lol - you sound like a puppy. with all that barking.

hey nathan - you ever posted pics? I imagine that you look a lot like a person, but filthy since you are canadian.

 

[Nathan]

lol - you sound like a puppy. with all that barking.

hey nathan - you ever posted pics? I imagine that you look a lot like a person, but filthy since you are canadian.

Yes, that is me entirely. I also have buck teeth and I'm cross-eyed. Oh, and I have hairy feet, much like a hobbit, and do not wear shoes or socks. I also only wear robes and use many different types of lotions for my face (which I also apply to my crotch cause it tingles pleasantly in that area when I do so).

Seriously, I would but am too lazy and have no camera or scanner. I will pretty soon I think. i really am a pretty lean 220 and want children everywhere to see my naked body on the internet. Have you? Post a pic.

 

[HappyScrappy]

I don't care about physique shots - I have a mirror for whacking-off to after all.
just curious if you look like Martin Lawrence.

I have posted pics in the past. I can't find the batteries... or any batteries realy - for my digital camera. I hear it needs those things.

 

[Nathan]

I don't care about physique shots - I have a mirror for whacking-off to after all.
just curious if you look like Martin Lawrence.

I have posted pics in the past. I can't find the batteries... or any batteries realy - for my digital camera. I hear it needs those things.

Yes, I look exactly like Martin Lawrence except I'm not black except for my pupils and I'm not ugly. If I were to compare myself to someone famous I would say I'm a mix between Brad Pitt, Harry Henderson and Rosie O'Donnell. there's a little bit of that dog from Frasier in there too.

 

[CYBERNIGG]

Maybe happyscrappy needs to get pissed on by nathan while wacking off in his mirror..lol

 

[HappyScrappy]

actually I have a pic of me taken several months ago when I lived in a different apartment. wow - maybe almost a year even. hot damn.

I post it on that post a pic thread that boach started.

it shows off some sweet eye bags I've got going on there from work.

 

[nekrawulf]

my excuse is recreational drugs...whats yours =-D

 

[Nathan]

I don't know how to talk to you anymore. I feel very uncomfortable right now. I think your infatuation with Jesus is creepy and weird and I'm sick of it frankly. Seriously. Yes. Purple scrotum all night long. Purple srotum plastered on my wall.

 

[Nathan]

I hate you. I wish I resembled that sexy bitch chunck. I'd like to ejaculate all over his face and...nevermind. What? Coming mom.

 

[HappyScrappy]

hmm, I'm not that much larger than SSME - I was near my biggest in that pic with him. I'm a little taller than him, but mostly I was closer to the camera.

that is the secret to looking big, always hug the person taking the pictures.

 

[nekrawulf]

HS, I have seen your pics (no, not THOSE ones), but the pics where you totally dwarfed SSME... I forgot where it was, but at a diner or something? While ago...

Nathan, I picture you having a face consisting of: Chunk from Goonies and Marilyn Manson, with gas station shades.


Whew! I am lucky I haven't posted a picture of my face!

HEEEYYY YOUUUU GGGUUUYYYSSSS!!!!

 

[HappyScrappy]

I'm 6'3" or so. I was up to 225 but now I'm closer to 190 or 200. I don't really weigh myself everyday like I used to. and I don't eat as much. and no drugs.

 

[DownUnder23]

I can't help but notice that I'm being neglected over here and frankly if I don't get some attnetion pretty damn soon I'm gonna start urinating on things that shouldn't be urinated on.

i have a cat like you!

 

[Nathan]

DRugs are an essential part of life I'll ahve you know. Not necessarliy bbing drugs but hallucinogens anyways. I wish I had some payote right now.

 

[Nathan]

Nathan, how's the Ortho Tricyclen working out for you?



Speaking of peyote, where's Peyote Killer? The hardcore TOOL fan.

I'm not sure what that is but how's the ass-packing going for you?

On a side note, I saw tool in concert a couple weeks ago and they were amazing. I might go with bigAragorn again to see them in Pennsylvania - he's TOOL groupie who is dying to have sex with Maynard.

 

[HappyScrappy]

it is birth control for chicks - also helps improve the skin.