Well how about instead of juicing you first try looking for someone to talk to about how you feel and how you process your self image?I don't know woot, I really wish I could answer why I even still think about continuing doing to do what I do. Maybe bigorexia, pushes me to do what I do. I mean look at anorexia they are killing themselves too for no logical reason. It's a mental thing maybe? Maybe I'm just fucked in the head?