Please Scroll Down to See Forums Below
Divorced people:
- Thread starter Cutiebaby
- Start date
I knew for years. Had to stay because I knew what kind of person he was (meaning, I knew if I left him he'd fuck me out of support one way or another, so I had to be able to support my son by myself). I cut him off from pussy and basically just "lived" with him. Shortly after my six month review at the job that would allow me to support myself and my kid, I hooked up with a lawyer, found an apartment and got the hell out.
As for what flipped the switch, it wasn't one big thing, it was really a whole bunch of things big and small, that just kept piling up and slowly eroded my respect and trust of him. It seemed like we argued about the same issues, over and over and over again. I think I remember saying to him that we'd been having the same fucking arguments for more than eight years. That shit just gets old. We had different life priorities.
As for what flipped the switch, it wasn't one big thing, it was really a whole bunch of things big and small, that just kept piling up and slowly eroded my respect and trust of him. It seemed like we argued about the same issues, over and over and over again. I think I remember saying to him that we'd been having the same fucking arguments for more than eight years. That shit just gets old. We had different life priorities.
S
silverstar1025
Guest
Paul_Allen said:
Do we need to start a new thread for you?
Bikini Mod
New member
Angel said:
I had waffled with the idea of divorcing several times over the course of 11 years or so. Each time he begged me to stay, said that he would change (he was always very jealous, possessive and verbally abusive when he did not get his way), we opted for counseling and things SEEMED to be ok for awhile that is, until I wore a short skirt or wasn't home (at Walmart w/3 kids in tow buying diapers) when he got home, or some other TERRIBLE behavior on my part. Several months before we actually separated things just seemed to be on a downhill that could not be fixed as I had just gotten tired of his empty promises.... Then one night he beat me to the ground. <----- THAT WAS IT FOR ME.
From what I have seen, it appears to depend a lot on why two people got married. How many of you have friends that met their spouse-to-be and married them within 6 months? Many of these are doomed to failure because what do you really know about a person in the 4 months it takes you to decide to spend 2 months planning a wedding LOL. Then there are the HS sweet hearts that get married because that is what everyone expects from them, 10 years and 4 kids later, they are both lookin for a little action outside because they can't stand one another (not always the case). Then there are the "I need security" unions...YUK.
But when I have seen two people that really like one another and respect each other come together, those are the unions that have the best chance, and sometimes even those fail because of timing, opportunity, divergence of goals. I find people that value comittment in all aspects of their lives do well within their marriages. The best marriages I have seen are when two people are best friends, the worst divorces I have seen is when one person does not live up to the expectations of the other....
But when I have seen two people that really like one another and respect each other come together, those are the unions that have the best chance, and sometimes even those fail because of timing, opportunity, divergence of goals. I find people that value comittment in all aspects of their lives do well within their marriages. The best marriages I have seen are when two people are best friends, the worst divorces I have seen is when one person does not live up to the expectations of the other....
Bikini Mod
New member
mydawgs said:
Agreed... Why like and respect and common goals are the criteria (IMHO) that one should use when surmizing a life partner. Why my first marriage failed and my last marriage isn't.
... and this notion of "love" is what those two find along the way.
seaking420
New member
Im not divorced, but seperated and very unsure of our future. For me its a few things. Got married way too young.....I thought it was the right thing to do because it was the next step since we were together for awhile...plus she kept asking me when I was going to propose........over time as you get older you figure yourself out and you change....sometimes people change together....other times they drift apart. I've been thinking about leaving for a few years now and even thought about leaving her when we were dating.
I agree with this. I think though its after a few years of dating that it becomes boring or the other person becomes a nag. Everyone is on their best behavior initially, after that reality sets in.
I agree with this. I think though its after a few years of dating that it becomes boring or the other person becomes a nag. Everyone is on their best behavior initially, after that reality sets in.
seaking420
New member
counseling dosent always work.....tried it and still trying it......no help so far
Pick your head up brother.......that emotional rollercoaster sucks.
when your going through similar shit like he is, you want to read what to expect or what other peoples experience have been. I've been talking to many people that have gone through or are going through the big D so I can see if I can figure out what to do in my life. What's the hardest thing is having children, that's what makes D very difficult....at least I think. But I also wonder if it really is that bad for the children if both parents are civil. You always hear..........its a shame....they have children.........but with todays' society and divorce rates so high kids from divorce parents arent really the minority anymore like 15-20 years ago. So I wonder if thats just a saying people say without any real knowledge.....idk
Similar threads
