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Dear _________,

R

Raina

Banned
Dear Work,
Thank you for somehow seeing potential in me that even I didn’t see and pushing me into roles that I never would have thought I could handle. The constant praise is very motivating and it’s been more fun than usual around here lately as I’m challenged daily….yet still find time to fuck off online.

Dear Clif Bars,
God I missed you and am glad to have you back in my diet. Yeah for trying to put on weight again and getting to add you back into the mix. Heavenly.

Dear Brand New Computer,
I love you. lol You were worth waiting for. I battled with the old computer for almost 6 years at work and now you’ve come into my life and it’s grand. It’s so nice not to spend ¼ of my day dealing with a crashed system.

Dear Sodoku,
Thank you for existing and giving me yet another way to avoid getting any work done.

Dear sheet of ice that slid off the roof of my car and cut my forehead yesterday,
WTF? I was just trying to scrape the car and you went and wounded me. That wasn’t cool. Now I have a stupid mark on my head.

Dear Bikram Yoga,
You’ve helped change my focus and challenge both my mind and my body. All I want to do is keep up my practice and eventually teach other people because if I could impart this kind of peace onto others, that would be a blessing beyond words. Plus the flexibility I’ve gotten via my practice is amazing and fun….it’s even weired out my parents.

Dear Trikonasana/Triangle Pose,
Thank you for putting my left T3 rib back in place. I was starting to think after 3 times a week at the chiropractor for so long that it would never get better and alas, 2 weeks into training you fixed it and all that shoulder pain is gone.
http://www.bikramyoga.com/Yoga/BikramRajashreeTriangle09.jpg.jpg

Dear Bits,
You’re so damn cute but please stop jumping up on my vanity and stealing my MAC brushes. Also please stop jumping in the bathtub and stealing razors, soap, etc. You’re lucky you’re so adorable and sweet or I’d be inclined to punt you across the house for being so destructive.

Dear Gizmo,
You’re such a good boy. You have that extra “something” a dog needs to be competitive and you were worth every penny. Someday we’re going to wind up competing nationally in agility. I know that we will.

Dear Parents,
Thank you for finally seeing where I was coming from and giving me your full support. It’s been so nice to be “normal” with you again and spend so much time with you. I missed that so much for quite a while.

Love,
Raina
 
you're so adorable.
 
Dear 1" stack of stickers in my desk,
I know it's a silly thing to get giddy about but you're so fun. lol I'd make an excellent 3rd grader. It's not official paperwork from my desk without a sparkly unicorn on the corner or something. Life's as fun as you make it and YOU stickers, are a tiny little source of amusement.

Love,
Raina
 
Dear Computer,
Why do you torment me so? I told you that I don't want to come around here. Well, now that I'm here, I might as well post.
 
thanks for the uplifting moment, you put a smile on my face, just with your gallery alone. And now with the sweet and peaceful words....thank you..
 
Dear Nursing Clinicals,
I’m so torn on starting you. I have so many interests right now in my life. It’s so difficult to decide what I really want to do. I’m blessed to have so many options. Thank God I don’t have to make any final decisions until July. I really really just want to tackle you though and finish up.

Dear Steel Cut Oats with Chopped Almonds, Almond Extract, and Splenda,
Wow. You took oatmeal to a whole new level.

Dear Snow Storm Yesterday,
Driving in you wildly on backstreets was fun. But the wet pants thing sucked. My jeans were wet from the knees down all day yesterday and I can’t say I liked that much.

Dear Life in General,
Thank you for being as you are. I never would have thought that I’d find peace in the middle of chaos but alas that’s been the case. Thank you for every moment of hurt, betrayal, and pain I’ve been through in the last year- it’s not only taught me about my ability to be strong but it’s also made all of the blessings in my life shine brighter. Thank you for so rarely letting me get so caught up in the moment that I couldn’t appreciate what I had and was still able to look ahead. I’m unstoppable at this point so watch out.

Love,
Raina
 
Dear boss,

Its my day off motherfucker....why did your number just come up on my caller ID? What stretch of your imagination made you think I was gonna be answering the phone today? You even had the balls to leave me a message which I will not even check until tomorrow at the earliest...what the hell is the matter with you? Are you that stupid? No wonder your in charge :rolleyes:.

Love
jack_schitt
 
Dear mother nature,

Thank you for changing the weather from 30degress F to 80 degrees F and back again in 2 days, making my sinus' go fricken crazy and giving me the flu.

Dear Nyquil,
Thank you for your sweet sweet nectar that makes me sleep and snore so much!

Dear wife,
Thank you for bearing with me while I take my nyquil and snore all night!
 
Dear Penis,

I'm a little angry at you now...I have a child on the way because of you. I was not really ready to have a child at this point in my life. But the strong willed penis that you are you just had to have what you wanted.
I have allways treated you with the utmost kindness and respect. I have shielded you from diseses,fatties and homosexuals. I have allways kept you clean, housed and well fed..I have carresed you when you needed a friend...I have accomidated you..when you had strange or outlandish needs...It seems now that you want to protest our new lifestyle...But you need to know that It was you that got us into this situation...and just understand that things will never be as they once were..
 
Dear New Employer,

Thank you for seeing things in me that no other employer has ever saw. For giving me the opportunity to take a chance on a new career. Hopefully, the testosterone crew won't mind a bit of estrogen being in the room and won't be pissed when I kick ass at this new job.

Dear Old Employer,

Thank you for the review this past January. It revealed my strengths 2-3 weeks before my new position was posted. It helped me ace my interview.

Dear Lucky Suit,

Well, we did it again. Five out five. Who knew almost 7 years later, we would still be working together for a common goal. You've fitted well, loose (like last Friday), a bit tight, and, um, there was that one time it was best to leave the jacket unbuttoned. It will be years before we see each other again. Thank you.
 
Last edited:
Dear Abby,
It was SO nice that you didn't have school last night and I got to talk to you. It's kind of sad when I can't even hang out with my little sister unless I book a pedicure with her or something. You are so irresponsible it blows me away but you're also so you- and all I can do is laugh because you're just like mom. Mom and I always say we hope you end up with a guy who's uptight and organized and will put your life in order. You're the best sister eva.

Love,
Raina
 
Dear Magic Rocks,
You look so pretty. Everyone always comments on them and picks them up. I have when people touch my stuff without asking. Fuckers.
Love,
Raina
 
dear current boss,

thank you for letting me slack like a champion over the last 2 years.

dear new boss,

thank you for not knowing a damned thing about me.
 
Raina said:
Dear Magic Rocks,
You look so pretty. Everyone always comments on them and picks them up. I have when people touch my stuff without asking. Fuckers.
Love,
Raina
Click to expand...

Those who touch the magic rocks with pure souls risk the Grand Canyons curse.




Grand Canyon be a freak, yo
 
Dear traffic

I hate you and I wish everyone drove like me
 
Dear Little Brother,
Thank you for BREAKING into my room, and leaving the following for me to find when i went home for my lunch break

1. The burnt in image on my 42'' plasma of Madden 2006 paused to show steelers 21 eagles 14
2. My Noise Cancelling headphones with the wire RIPPED out
3. My suit jacket i just got back from the cleaners and had laid out for my date tonight thrown on the floor

WTF DID YOU DO IN MY ROOM TO CAUSE THIS MUCH DAMAGE IN ONE DAY???

And a special thank you in advance for the ass-whoopin i will give you as soon as i see you.

Thanks,
Your pissed off big brother who is twice the size of you and whoops your ass whenever you do stupid shit like this yet you don't seem to learn
 
Dear brain,
Stop doing what ever you are doing. You are ruining my life. I once lived a life of luxury. It was carefree and out of control. I loved it. Now you have ruined it.

Your penis

PS. If you don't have sex with some strippers, models, porno stars and/or prostitutes I will devise a way to kill you soon!
 
Dear gods of grading things,

thank you for passing down to me the ability to grade threads. I was never good at grading anything until you bestowed this gift upon me.

A. very nice thread.
 
dear cute asian chick in my volleyball class,

I noticed that little smile of interest you gave me as we crossed ways near the benches yesterday. I think you're cute too. I'm sorry I hit your boob with the ball when I threw it in frustration of missing the hit. I'm glad I purposely walked faster afterclass to catch up to you and say "see you next week" just so you'd notice me and I'm guessing it worked 'cause you were standing there waving bye as I drove by. I hope we can have sex soon.
 
SoreArms said:
dear cute asian chick in my volleyball class,

I noticed that little smile of interest you gave me as we crossed ways near the benches yesterday. I think you're cute too. I'm sorry I hit your boob with the ball when I threw it in frustration of missing the hit. I'm glad I purposely walked faster afterclass to catch up to you and say "see you next week" just so you'd notice me and I'm guessing it worked 'cause you were standing there waving bye as I drove by. I hope we can have sex soon.
Click to expand...

you should buy the baby blue Nike Hats south korea wore and wear it to class. she'll be down.

Dear Big Baby Jesus,

Thank you for construction paper, crayons, and avatars
 
SoKlueles said:
lol of course his freakin ass was busted:)

dear kak,
i hope it was nice knowing hammys kak
or something
Click to expand...

dear SoKlu,

Thanks for being mean to me all the time for no reason and making me go on prescription Paxil everytime I see you
 
Kakdiesel said:
dear SoKlu,

Thanks for being mean to me all the time for no reason and making me go on prescription Paxil everytime I see you
Click to expand...
dear Kak
your welcome :) and share the damned paxil



dear target shoppers
i hate that damned button that you click when your fuggin starin right at me to get customer service
I hope your finger rots off
 
Dear work____________________

your a bunch of lieing no good scum,you advertise the position as a retail investigator,but where am I? stuck on some shitty construction site working with idiots,one even being handicapped,Sir this is mentally taxing on me but you have me trapped no ,I need the money to pay the bills so I will shut up and be your bitch until I get a real job.

Dear Kris______
the little things you brought to my life recently have really brightened it up,hearing your voice and your little jokes at the end of the day make it a little brighter,thats about all I can say to that

Dear Cat____
you annoy the hell out of me only being nice when you want treats,I should lock you in the basement you rat
 
SoKlueles said:
dear Kak
your welcome :) and share the damned paxil



dear target shoppers
i hate that damned button that you click when your fuggin starin right at me to get customer service
I hope your finger rots off
Click to expand...
tennesee has their own version of paxil..its called whiskey
 
Dear contractors that built my house,

Were you guys fuckin high or what? I could have put up straighter walls with my eyes closed. Idiots.

Love
jack_schitt
 
Raina said:
Dear Work,
Thank you for somehow seeing potential in me that even I didn’t see and pushing me into roles that I never would have thought I could handle. The constant praise is very motivating and it’s been more fun than usual around here lately as I’m challenged daily….yet still find time to fuck off online.

Dear Clif Bars,
God I missed you and am glad to have you back in my diet. Yeah for trying to put on weight again and getting to add you back into the mix. Heavenly.

Dear Brand New Computer,
I love you. lol You were worth waiting for. I battled with the old computer for almost 6 years at work and now you’ve come into my life and it’s grand. It’s so nice not to spend ¼ of my day dealing with a crashed system.

Dear Sodoku,
Thank you for existing and giving me yet another way to avoid getting any work done.

Dear sheet of ice that slid off the roof of my car and cut my forehead yesterday,
WTF? I was just trying to scrape the car and you went and wounded me. That wasn’t cool. Now I have a stupid mark on my head.

Dear Bikram Yoga,
You’ve helped change my focus and challenge both my mind and my body. All I want to do is keep up my practice and eventually teach other people because if I could impart this kind of peace onto others, that would be a blessing beyond words. Plus the flexibility I’ve gotten via my practice is amazing and fun….it’s even weired out my parents.

Dear Trikonasana/Triangle Pose,
Thank you for putting my left T3 rib back in place. I was starting to think after 3 times a week at the chiropractor for so long that it would never get better and alas, 2 weeks into training you fixed it and all that shoulder pain is gone.
http://www.bikramyoga.com/Yoga/BikramRajashreeTriangle09.jpg.jpg

Dear Bits,
You’re so damn cute but please stop jumping up on my vanity and stealing my MAC brushes. Also please stop jumping in the bathtub and stealing razors, soap, etc. You’re lucky you’re so adorable and sweet or I’d be inclined to punt you across the house for being so destructive.

Dear Gizmo,
You’re such a good boy. You have that extra “something” a dog needs to be competitive and you were worth every penny. Someday we’re going to wind up competing nationally in agility. I know that we will.

Dear Parents,
Thank you for finally seeing where I was coming from and giving me your full support. It’s been so nice to be “normal” with you again and spend so much time with you. I missed that so much for quite a while.

Love,
Raina
Click to expand...
Dear Raina :p
 
Dear Pay Day,

Thank you for bring my bank account out of a negative balance.

Dear Bill Collectors,

:doublefi: You have left me with very little play money for this month. :(
 
superqt4u2nv said:
Dear Pay Day,

Thank you for bring my bank account out of a negative balance.

Dear Bill Collectors,

:doublefi: You have left me with very little play money for this month. :(
Click to expand...
Dear QT,
Sell more stuff. Quit your bitching. You didn't think that the blow up dolls were free, did you? BTW, stop calling the fattie date line. You're spending more then you earn.

Love,
The Bill collectors.
 
EnderJE said:
Dear QT,
Sell more stuff. Quit your bitching. You didn't think that the blow up dolls were free, did you? BTW, stop calling the fattie date line. You're spending more then you earn.

Love,
The Bill collectors.
Click to expand...
Dear Ender

Eat a dick.

Yours in hate,

SuperQT
 
superqt4u2nv said:
Dear Ender

Eat a dick.

Yours in hate,

SuperQT
Click to expand...
Dear QT,
Sorry about making you lose that competition. Sorry about making you lose the next one. Sorry about your declining bustline. Sorry about that guy because he's really after...oh wait. Those two haven't happened yet.

Love
God
 
Dear Penis,
I don't think I like you anymore,
You used to watch me shave,
Now all you do is stare at the floor.
Oh dear Penis,
I don't like you anymore.

It used to be you and me,
A paper towel, and a dirty magazine,
That's all we needed to get by.
Now it seems things have changed,
I think that your the one to blame.
Dear Penis,
I don't like you anymore.

Now he sings,

Dear Rodney,
I don't think I like you anymore,
'Cause when you get to drinkin'
You put me places I've never been before.
Dear Rodney,
I dont like you anymore.

Why can't we just get a grip,
On our man to hand relationship.
Come to terms with truly how we feel.
If we put our heads together,
We'd just stay home forever.
Dear Penis,
I think I like you after all.

Oh and Rodney,
While yer shavin',
Shave my balls.
 
EnderJE said:
Dear QT,
Sorry about making you lose that competition. Sorry about making you lose the next one. Sorry about your declining bustline. Sorry about that guy because he's really after...oh wait. Those two haven't happened yet.

Love
God
Click to expand...
Dear Ender,

Sorry about the red :evil: not really ;)
 
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