Here is a serious, rational, analytic response.
Last night I didn't come home. Big shit. I forgot to call and tell my dad.
Your dad was expecting you to come home. Seeing as how the standard procedure at your house does not seem to be "don't come home" (since he was upset the next day), then you were deviating from standard procedure. It was YOUR responsibility to inform him of this.
If you were a provider for a large corporation, and one of your shipments was running late, wouldn't it be your job to call the corporation and let them know what's going on?
I walk in this morning and my Dad is acting cool like it was no big deal. My mom gets home from out of town and within 30 minutes of her coming in I hear him grilling me in the living room.
Your household is a corporation run by two capable officers. One is called Mom and the other is called Dad. Stardard procedure involves consulting one another before undertaking various tasks that affect the both of them. Bitching out the disobedient child affects both of them, so Dad had to talk to Mom first, and vice-versa.
That is weak shit. I'm in college and he is still pulling that.
What does that have to do with anything? You exist by virtue of HIS and HER charity. If you think your life would be as great if you were on your own, paying for your own house, car, insurance, education, food, etc..., then I don't think many people would agree with you. One who lives by another's charity has no right to complain about the other. You don't about your dad, I don't about mine, and no one does about his.
The day you move out and are self-sustaining, you are free to talk whatever shit you wish about your parent(s). If you work for a shitty boss, you quit the company. If you don't like your current company, quit. Otherwise, stfu and don't be late - you're liable to get fired.
-Warik