Best advice quote ever.

[Scotsman]

So I am out with some friends the other night having a couple drinks eating a Village Inn etc. So it's Me, Two of my friends, one of the guys now ex-girlfriend and her friend (girl). So it was a fun night just sat around talking.

Anyway as for the quote.
My friend and I get in the car to go home since I am driving his drunk ass around. He looks over at me and says "You know, maybe it's because I've slept with more than 30 women, but I know girls pretty well and that girl was all about you"

How great is that to start advice with "maybe its because I've slept with more that 30 women"

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[FISHTALES]

well, did you take the advice?

 

[Becoming]

30, that's it?

he's a closet homo - dont listen to a work he says, he will knock you out and ass rape you.

quit going commando in the kilt

 

[Ulcasterdropout]

LOL. I've heard that almost identical line....

 

[Scotsman]

Fishtales- Here was my response. "I know, I'm not single because I don't know when girls like me, I just don't care."
Becoming- I don't wear kilts around him.LOL
Ulcaster- It's a classic.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Lestat]

i've had many women but I still never "know" anything for certain when it comes to the ladies...

 

[jerseyart]

I don't get it

 

[Scotsman]

I don't get it

That's nice.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[jerseyart]

I'm not being a smart ass, I really don't get it.

Is it just supposed to be a way to joke about having slept with lots of women?

 

[Scotsman]

I'm not being a smart ass, I really don't get it.

Is it just supposed to be a way to joke about having slept with lots of women?

Oh I thought you were being a smart ass. Otherwise I would have responded with this:

No the funny part is that a guy who has slept with over 30 women starts off a piece of advice with that tidbit of knowledge. Kind of like me telling you how to bench because I've benched over 30 times. I was illustrating the point that it was funny that that is how he began his remark.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Becoming]

I was illustrating the point that it was funny that that is how he began his remark.

Right, that and the point he was trying to lure scots into his bi-sexual web with his tales of success with the fairer sex...

 

[Scotsman]

Right, that and the point he was trying to lure scots into his bi-sexual web with his tales of success with the fairer sex...

Again Becoming quit trying to force your homoerotic fantasies on me. And quit pm'ing me for picks up my kilt you sicko.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Becoming]

Again Becoming quit trying to force your homoerotic fantasies on me. And quit pm'ing me for picks up my kilt you sicko.

Have you ever dressed up as a clown?

 

[Scotsman]

Have you ever dressed up as a clown?

I am very afraid of where this is going. No I haven't. And before you ask no I will not dress up as one and touch you in your special places so you can live out your molestation by a clown fantasy.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Becoming]

I am very afraid of where this is going. No I haven't. And before you ask no I will not dress up as one and touch you in your special places so you can live out your molestation by a clown fantasy.

Damn, shit is always more special when a clown is involved...

 

[Scotsman]

Damn, shit is always more special when a clown is involved...

Tread lighly you are headed for another owning. Bozo Bopper.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Becoming]

Tread lighly you are headed for another owning. Bozo Bopper.

Doh!

 

[Scotsman]

Doh!

Alright we need to pick just one thread to hijack this two thread thing is going to confuse me.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Becoming]

Alright we need to pick just one thread to hijack this two thread thing is going to confuse me.

I don't think I have ever NOT hijacked a thread...

8500+ posts of misdirection and counting....

 

[Scotsman]

I don't think I have ever NOT hijacked a thread...

8500+ posts of misdirection and counting....

Well put. Alright I have to go home and then to the gym. Talk to everyone tomorrow.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Becoming]

Well put. Alright I have to go home and then to the gym. Talk to everyone tomorrow.

Me too, got to go bench... lata

 

[Scotsman]

Me too, got to go bench... lata

OK I'm back now. How was benching? Did you punch the clown when you were done?

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Becoming]

OK I'm back now. How was benching? Did you punch the clown when you were done?

Pretty good workout last heavy one before the meet on the 17th...

495 520 545 all touch and touched 365 2 out of 3 after just for practice (single ply)

Punched the clown for sure after, to some "hot mom's" porn, cause the wife gets home late from work wednesdays...

 

[Scotsman]

Pretty good workout last heavy one before the meet on the 17th...

495 520 545 all touch and touched 365 2 out of 3 after just for practice (single ply)

Punched the clown for sure after, to some "hot mom's" porn, cause the wife gets home late from work wednesdays...

Nicely done. After my strongman comp I am going to shirt up and see what I can bench.

Good job with the clown. Sometimes when the lady's gone you just have to rough up the suspect.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Becoming]

Nicely done. After my strongman comp I am going to shirt up and see what I can bench.

Good job with the clown. Sometimes when the lady's gone you just have to rough up the suspect.

Yeah, the shirt is cool, I don't feel all beat up like after raw bench... my tris still need to "grow into it" tho, I have only been using if for about 6 weeks or so.. I think I will be able to put up 6 by the end of the year...

Yeah, she was a naughty mommy for sure...

 

[WalkingBeast]

Eating a village inn always tires me the FUCK out. Keep it up brother!!

 

[GoldenDelicious]

30? how old is this guy?

 

[Scotsman]

Yeah, the shirt is cool, I don't feel all beat up like after raw bench... my tris still need to "grow into it" tho, I have only been using if for about 6 weeks or so.. I think I will be able to put up 6 by the end of the year...

Yeah, she was a naughty mommy for sure...

600 would be awesome I don't think I will ever get there as bench just isn't my lift.

Naughty mommies rule.

Beast- The village is quite the experience.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[TheProject]

Best thread ever.

Oh, btw...blood on the clown suit.




Anyone who knows that joke is sick and wrong.

 

[Becoming]

GoldenDelicious- Who?

Project- I don't know that one - tell it... (I did just recently hear the "nothing is funny about rape, unless its a clown" one tho, lol)

Scots - It didn't used to be my lift either

 

[Scotsman]

Best thread ever.

Oh, btw...blood on the clown suit.




Anyone who knows that joke is sick and wrong.

What's the worst thing about having sex with a five year old boy?




Getting the blood out of the clown suit.

But you already knew I was sick and wrong.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[TheProject]

What's the worst thing about having sex with a five year old boy?




Getting the blood out of the clown suit.

But you already knew I was sick and wrong.

Cheers,
Scotsman

See, I knew someone else would get it.

'Cept, when I heard it, the joke was 7 year old girl, and one of my buddies has a daughter that age.

He didn't think it was nearly as funny.

 

[Becoming]

See, I knew someone else would get it.

'Cept, when I heard it, the joke was 7 year old girl, and one of my buddies has a daughter that age.

He didn't think it was nearly as funny.

hahaha, what is the best thing about 7 year old girls?

if you slick their hair back in the shower they look 5...

 

[Scotsman]

hahaha, what is the best thing about 7 year old girls?

if you slick their hair back in the shower they look 5...

Ok here goes the thread lock post.

-What's wrong with sleeping with a 12yo boy?

Nothing.

-What's so great about 7yp girls?

Your dick looks huge in their hands.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[WalkingBeast]

How do ya remove dead babies from a pick-up truck?














With a pitch fork...

 

[jh1]

495 520 545 all touch and touched 365 2 out of 3 after just for practice (single ply)

Screw all you pricks with the genes to pull this shit off...

Kiss my ass Becoming, Kiss it.

 

[Becoming]

Screw all you pricks with the genes to pull this shit off...

Kiss my ass Becoming, Kiss it.

Hey fellas - I hear JH1's got an ass like a 10 year old girl....

dig it...

 

[jh1]

Hey fellas - I hear JH1's got an ass like a 10 year old girl....

dig it...

Yeah no shit... That is the #1 reason I will never let myself go to prison..


Fuck that noise...

 

[Becoming]

Yeah no shit... That is the #1 reason I will never let myself go to prison..


Fuck that noise...

hahah, there was this dude in grad school with us who was real weakish and we were walking down the hallway one day he was in front of us about 10 yards and I said that same line about him "dammmmmn! dudes got an ass like a 10 y o girl!"

dudes were rolling on the floor laughing...

 

[Scotsman]

hahah, there was this dude in grad school with us who was real weakish and we were walking down the hallway one day he was in front of us about 10 yards and I said that same line about him "dammmmmn! dudes got an ass like a 10 y o girl!"

dudes were rolling on the floor laughing...

Now I know why I like you. I make remarks like that all the time.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Becoming]

Now I know why I like you. I make remarks like that all the time.

Hey don't stand too close to me there big guy!

j/k

actually me and my friends make homo jokes about each other all the time... it is truly funny stuff, too bad for political correctness, cause there is a huge area of comic potential there...

what is funny is when you are in the gym and making jokes like this and little regular dudes see a coupla guys 250-300lbs making jokes like this.... they look REAL uncomfortable...

hahaha.

 

[Scotsman]

Hey don't stand too close to me there big guy!

j/k

actually me and my friends make homo jokes about each other all the time... it is truly funny stuff, too bad for political correctness, cause there is a huge area of comic potential there...

what is funny is when you are in the gym and making jokes like this and little regular dudes see a coupla guys 250-300lbs making jokes like this.... they look REAL uncomfortable...

hahaha.

No shit, my friends and I would always dick around like that at the gym. Most people would leave, so at least we had the gym to ourselves. I got banned from talking a lot.

Best ever this spandex short wearing old geek comes over and says "could you guys keep it down a bit I can't get in my zone"
My friend Pete replied "why don't you just shut the fuck up"
When we finished laughing I told them oh shit I am gonna hear about this later as I was the manager. So we laughed another five minutes.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Becoming]

No shit, my friends and I would always dick around like that at the gym. Most people would leave, so at least we had the gym to ourselves. I got banned from talking a lot.

Best ever this spandex short wearing old geek comes over and says "could you guys keep it down a bit I can't get in my zone"
My friend Pete replied "why don't you just shut the fuck up"
When we finished laughing I told them oh shit I am gonna hear about this later as I was the manager. So we laughed another five minutes.

lol - yeah what sucks is I workout at a small place or garage gyms mostly now so I really don't get much chance to interact...

mostly when I come in people start leaving... I don't know why but throwing 500lbs on the bench seems to make people more uncomfortable than the gay jokes... maybe cause they are db pressing the 35s...

one guy got props tho... my wife was in there doing db presses with like 35-40s (for 10 reps sets) and dude goes to his buddy who was pressing with like 25-30s - "yo you better step that shit up a notch cause that chick is kicking our ass all over the place"

almost lost my shit and hi-fived the guy for that one

 

[supersizeme]

i was going to post on this thread but then i remembered that i'm bigger than everyone on here and can't relate to anything you all are talking about

 

[Becoming]

i was going to post on this thread but then i remembered that i'm bigger than everyone on here and can't relate to anything you all are talking about

that's what happens when you are superhuge like yourself...

hey we got that special bar in that you ordered... 3000lb capacity... try not to break this one, it was expensive as hell....

 

[Scotsman]

lol - yeah what sucks is I workout at a small place or garage gyms mostly now so I really don't get much chance to interact...

mostly when I come in people start leaving... I don't know why but throwing 500lbs on the bench seems to make people more uncomfortable than the gay jokes... maybe cause they are db pressing the 35s...

one guy got props tho... my wife was in there doing db presses with like 35-40s (for 10 reps sets) and dude goes to his buddy who was pressing with like 25-30s - "yo you better step that shit up a notch cause that chick is kicking our ass all over the place"

almost lost my shit and hi-fived the guy for that one

Yeah when I load up stuff for back and legs people give me the "oh no it's godzilla" look. At least they don't try to talk to me I hate that shit, when people you don't know come up and make small talk. If you have a question ask it otherwise shut it.

Awesome with your wife there are a lot of guys she would school at my gym.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[supersizeme]

thanks dude. finally i can upright row again.

you gotta post some vids of these 500+ lb benches. i will help you edit out the fanny pack if that's what's keeping you from sharing that with all of us.

 

[Becoming]

you gotta post some vids of these 500+ lb benches. i will help you edit out the fanny pack if that's what's keeping you from sharing that with all of us.

I dont' have a digi camera dude... hopefully one of the dudes will take a pic if not a vid at the meet on the 17th.... only one other of them is lifting tho, so we shall see...

I prolly would have a camera but this PL is expensive shit... I only have about half the gear I need for a full meet.


Scots- Yeah, I like when I am doing inclines in the rack with 400+ and some dude is doing them on the incline bench (which luckily for them is right next to the rack) with 25s on the bar... LOL

Not to sound too concieted cause I know someone like PittbullSTL could come in and pwn my ass any day of the week...

 

[Scotsman]

I dont' have a digi camera dude... hopefully one of the dudes will take a pic if not a vid at the meet on the 17th.... only one other of them is lifting tho, so we shall see...

I prolly would have a camera but this PL is expensive shit... I only have about half the gear I need for a full meet.


Scots- Yeah, I like when I am doing inclines in the rack with 400+ and some dude is doing them on the incline bench (which luckily for them is right next to the rack) with 25s on the bar... LOL

Not to sound too concieted cause I know someone like PittbullSTL could come in and pwn my ass any day of the week...

Where's your meet at?

Yeah the PL gear doesn't come cheap. I am deciding whether to get a new kilt or a squat suit. I need the kilt for the highland games, but I need to start squatting in a suit for fall. Oh the connundrum.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[Becoming]

Where's your meet at?

Yeah the PL gear doesn't come cheap. I am deciding whether to get a new kilt or a squat suit. I need the kilt for the highland games, but I need to start squatting in a suit for fall. Oh the connundrum.

Shit is expensive as hell for sure... It is here in mesa on the 17th...

I am benching with single ply shirt, squatting pulling raw (will get suit and briefs for next meet)

It is single ply natty tested meet. It is my first, so I don't expect to do the best possible, but I want to give it a good run anyways...

They have all raw meets too... I think I am going to go full gear in the fall (NOV), and raw meet next spring... I will be eligible for track then too, so going raw in the spring will make sense...

Discs and shots are pricey too

 

[Gambino]

Don't shit were you eat...the best advice I have ever heard...

 

[BonerBoy]

Don't shit were you eat...the best advice I have ever heard...

what? dont eat krispy kremes on the toilet?

 

[Ulcasterdropout]

Question everything. Learn something. Answer nothing.

 

[Becoming]

Don't shit were you eat...the best advice I have ever heard...

Are you under the dilusion that this thread is about advice?

Don't eat anything bigger than your head.

Don't wear a red hood when walking through the forest on the way to grandma's house.

That is some fucking grade-A advice bro.