Er, mmm, well, my girlfreind pinned me to the bed and spanked me till I enjoyed it so that I understood, then inspired, I found a whole new range of sexual practices to avoid. So, as a hint, I'd pin your boyfreind down and spank his botty for him and see if he can get into the swing of things....see if he can empathise with what you get out of it. Oh, if he thinks your joking its' probably because you have not approached him in a way he understands....if you approach it jokingly to break it to him, it won't work I reckon. Sit him down, tell him about a fantasy you want to enact and even do my old favourite....."Darling, we have had some good practice but now I think we nead to take our shagging to the next stage, its'not that your shit in bed....god knows that is not true but WE could be so much better if you just use this stick....."