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First the good. She does great with school and work. Everyone likes her and she's as sweet as can be. Always helpful and courteous, and she also goes out of her way for people probably more than she should, especially when it comes to her siblings and even her parents. She has to juggle a lot since she works full time and goes to school full time.
The problem is it creates a lot of stress for her. The other problem is, she never developed a healthy way of dealing with it. Her best friend, who has pretty much devolved into an alcoholic pothead who can't even hold a part time job and barely goes to school anymore, introduced her to smoking herb, long before I met her. Like just out of high school. She also ran with a less than respectable crowd growing up, to which I kinda blame passive parenting more than anything.
Fast forward about 8 years and she's admittedly addicted. I know, "you can't get addicted to pot". Well, it's a big deal for her to go a weekend without it. Her personal life lacks the self discipline she has for school and work. So this weekend in particular she decided to drive an hour each way to get "cheap" stuff from this girl. I don't want to get into too many details of her living situation. Let's just say we were clear with each other she doesn't go into her house, which is actually her scrubby boyfriend's house whose roommates recently had scabies. Yeah. We're both talking about saving money for a trip this winter, as well as all the other random things we want to do til then, but she didn't want to wait a few days til she can get some from in town.
I'll admit I've smoked in the past before her and have since joined her for some here and there but it's getting old, and I wonder if she'll ever change. She doesn't always eat very well, never exercises, and can be careless with things when she smokes. The more serious we get the less I'm willing to put up with it. Makes me very leery about ever having kids, because they don't deserve to have to deal with it.
The problem is her having to keep it a secret from so many people, including many we work with (yup, we work same place, actually how we met). It obviously puts us both in a bind.
I've tried leveling with her at least once a year about it all, but some of the stuff she comes back at me with makes me kinda wonder why we're still together. Her reply is almost verbatim "maybe we're not meant for each other". Ok, so say we break up, then everyone's wondering why and I have to keep the reasons a secret or else she gets into trouble with work at the very least.
This is the type of shit drug habits bring into people's lives.
So, if anyone still wonders why I'm so conservative and hardass about things, it's because the alternative far too often leads to what you just read through.
The problem is it creates a lot of stress for her. The other problem is, she never developed a healthy way of dealing with it. Her best friend, who has pretty much devolved into an alcoholic pothead who can't even hold a part time job and barely goes to school anymore, introduced her to smoking herb, long before I met her. Like just out of high school. She also ran with a less than respectable crowd growing up, to which I kinda blame passive parenting more than anything.
Fast forward about 8 years and she's admittedly addicted. I know, "you can't get addicted to pot". Well, it's a big deal for her to go a weekend without it. Her personal life lacks the self discipline she has for school and work. So this weekend in particular she decided to drive an hour each way to get "cheap" stuff from this girl. I don't want to get into too many details of her living situation. Let's just say we were clear with each other she doesn't go into her house, which is actually her scrubby boyfriend's house whose roommates recently had scabies. Yeah. We're both talking about saving money for a trip this winter, as well as all the other random things we want to do til then, but she didn't want to wait a few days til she can get some from in town.
I'll admit I've smoked in the past before her and have since joined her for some here and there but it's getting old, and I wonder if she'll ever change. She doesn't always eat very well, never exercises, and can be careless with things when she smokes. The more serious we get the less I'm willing to put up with it. Makes me very leery about ever having kids, because they don't deserve to have to deal with it.
The problem is her having to keep it a secret from so many people, including many we work with (yup, we work same place, actually how we met). It obviously puts us both in a bind.
I've tried leveling with her at least once a year about it all, but some of the stuff she comes back at me with makes me kinda wonder why we're still together. Her reply is almost verbatim "maybe we're not meant for each other". Ok, so say we break up, then everyone's wondering why and I have to keep the reasons a secret or else she gets into trouble with work at the very least.
This is the type of shit drug habits bring into people's lives.
So, if anyone still wonders why I'm so conservative and hardass about things, it's because the alternative far too often leads to what you just read through.
