gf called the vet, but she forgot to mention that this started right after the collar went on him. they said it sounds like he was spooked and he probably pissed in the bed because he couldn't get out to the litter box.
i dragged him from his hiding place a little while ago and took the collar off of him. he was kinda cool after that. he went over and started eating. as a test, i put it back on him. as soon as he moved his head and heard the bell, he went to take off but i grabbed him and removed the collar.
so i took the collar and put duct tape over the bell so it doesn't jingle, just makes a quiet "tink." he was ok with that for a few minutes, then he ran off. i don't understand this because he had tags on him when we got him and they made noise too.
in any event, i'm gonna get him used to the collar so we can tag both cats just in case they get outside. they're strictly indoor cats. they've gotten out before and completely freaked out. if it happens again and they run off, i'd at least like to know that they're tagged so we might be able to get them back.