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I've been at college now for about 2 weeks,
and at first I was all hyped up and wanting to talk to ppl and all,
But lately I've felt down about everything, kinda depressed and not in the mood to talk to anyone or do anything.
in the first few days, I was deathly scared about ppl not liking me, and me not having ppl to hang around with, and not finding any good friends, etc.
I had a bad experience back in high school where I was a major introvert, didn't talk to girls, had the same friends for 6 years, and was real shy and had a low self esteem. a total loser.
Now I really really really want to reverse that, this is the #1 goal in my life, more important than the education itself here at this school, and I want to have a social life really bad. I have lacked one for the longest time.
Unfortunately lately I've found it really hard to talk to anyone or do anything. It's like i've been depressed, unmotivated, have had a hard time getting work done or having fun. This is quite possibly the worst thing that could happen to me in the first 2 weeks of school!
It's sad, quite honestly, I've been spending the last week doing nothing, basically during my day I eat constantly because I'm so stressed out (making it even worse since I'm really critical about my diet usually) I sometimes get a workout in, and I go to classes, and I somehow manage to get my homework done (usually involves me working for half an hour, sitting around for an hour doing nothing, and then getting up and working again, and repeating that)
when I do nothing, i usually stare at my computer or lie down and sleep in bed even tho i've gotten plenty of sleep the night before.
I hear that my opportunity will be over soon, and that ppl will have their cliques, and it will be like pulling teeth, trying to get into one.
I'm really nervous, don't have any faith inmyself that i can do this, and I dont know why I'm so weird or what is wrong with me.
All I know is after the first few days, for some reason I kinda gave up. I made so many mistakes then even, when I was trying, I am such a rookie at this socializing game that its embarassing.
I just wish I had a good high school history or that I coulda been more ready for this.
Either way, I just want to take over my life right now and turn it from a depression into a well of excitement and happiness.
I just don't know what to do.
and at first I was all hyped up and wanting to talk to ppl and all,
But lately I've felt down about everything, kinda depressed and not in the mood to talk to anyone or do anything.
in the first few days, I was deathly scared about ppl not liking me, and me not having ppl to hang around with, and not finding any good friends, etc.
I had a bad experience back in high school where I was a major introvert, didn't talk to girls, had the same friends for 6 years, and was real shy and had a low self esteem. a total loser.
Now I really really really want to reverse that, this is the #1 goal in my life, more important than the education itself here at this school, and I want to have a social life really bad. I have lacked one for the longest time.
Unfortunately lately I've found it really hard to talk to anyone or do anything. It's like i've been depressed, unmotivated, have had a hard time getting work done or having fun. This is quite possibly the worst thing that could happen to me in the first 2 weeks of school!
It's sad, quite honestly, I've been spending the last week doing nothing, basically during my day I eat constantly because I'm so stressed out (making it even worse since I'm really critical about my diet usually) I sometimes get a workout in, and I go to classes, and I somehow manage to get my homework done (usually involves me working for half an hour, sitting around for an hour doing nothing, and then getting up and working again, and repeating that)
when I do nothing, i usually stare at my computer or lie down and sleep in bed even tho i've gotten plenty of sleep the night before.
I hear that my opportunity will be over soon, and that ppl will have their cliques, and it will be like pulling teeth, trying to get into one.
I'm really nervous, don't have any faith inmyself that i can do this, and I dont know why I'm so weird or what is wrong with me.
All I know is after the first few days, for some reason I kinda gave up. I made so many mistakes then even, when I was trying, I am such a rookie at this socializing game that its embarassing.
I just wish I had a good high school history or that I coulda been more ready for this.
Either way, I just want to take over my life right now and turn it from a depression into a well of excitement and happiness.
I just don't know what to do.
- everybody has their different methods of dealing with problems- but you need to just grit your teeth and jump in, man. In this case, that which doesn't kill you really will make you stronger.
