What expectations do you have...

[SoKlueles]

Ok heres my take on things
There has to be trust between us and communication.....because if theres not that there is nothing.
I like us to go do things, even if its nothing that costs money....because he knows what i like to do....and i know what he likes.
I know its girly but cuddling is so special to me....its even more special than sex. Sex satisfies you but cuddling shows how much the SO loves you. He/she is willing to sit there and spend time with you. I like to give him massages and stuff....and it doesnt mean im after sex, it means that i love him and only him. I like him to just tell me how good the dinner is that i cook. I like when he notices little things i do for him and i like him to do little things for me.....that shows a sign of selflessness.

 

[habitualhealth]

communication is overrated
actions speak louder than words
anyone can communicate a bunch of lies!!!!!!

OMG! BEST POST EVER!

 

[Scotsman]

There is one word you need to focus on. RECIPROCATION

If you trust them they must trust you.
If you console them they must console you.
If you say I love you they must say it back and both need to really mean it.

Reciprocation means one thing in relationships. It means it isn't one sided, that neither person has to work harder than the other, that neither person is neglecting the other.

Expectations are dangerous to go into a relationship with as they can cause it's premature demise. You have to feel out the other person and figure out if the two of you can make it work or not. That's what dating is all about figuring out the other person and whether or not it's worth investing time, energy, and effort into this person. Love/lust fade fairly quickly in the scheme of things and the love/friendship had better be the strongest part. Just because someone doesn't meet the criteria on a list doesn't mean that they aren't the right one, because some bonds take time to make.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[habitualhealth]

Ok heres my take on things
There has to be trust between us and communication.....because if theres not that there is nothing.
I like us to go do things, even if its nothing that costs money....because he knows what i like to do....and i know what he likes.
I know its girly but cuddling is so special to me....its even more special than sex. Sex satisfies you but cuddling shows how much the SO loves you. He/she is willing to sit there and spend time with you. I like to give him massages and stuff....and it doesnt mean im after sex, it means that i love him and only him. I like him to just tell me how good the dinner is that i cook. I like when he notices little things i do for him and i like him to do little things for me.....that shows a sign of selflessness.

Great post soklu.

Hammy...get on the ball man.

 

[SoKlueles]

Great post soklu.

Hammy...get on the ball man.

lol yeah whatever
but anyway......its hard for me sometimes to post how i feel about things....its like my mind and my hands work on different levels lol

 

[Griz1]

Without reading the whole thread...

I expect her to swallow...

 

[habitualhealth]

There is one word you need to focus on. RECIPROCATION

If you trust them they must trust you.
If you console them they must console you.
If you say I love you they must say it back and both need to really mean it.

Reciprocation means one thing in relationships. It means it isn't one sided, that neither person has to work harder than the other, that neither person is neglecting the other.

Expectations are dangerous to go into a relationship with as they can cause it's premature demise. You have to feel out the other person and figure out if the two of you can make it work or not. That's what dating is all about figuring out the other person and whether or not it's worth investing time, energy, and effort into this person. Love/lust fade fairly quickly in the scheme of things and the love/friendship had better be the strongest part. Just because someone doesn't meet the criteria on a list doesn't mean that they aren't the right one, because some bonds take time to make.

Cheers,
Scotsman

Great post scots...question for you...when you realize it's not reciprocated and you actually confide in them and beg for that....at what point do you just walk away? Let's say they tell you over and over again that they love you? That they are going to try...that they will change...that they want to be with you? Do you continue to give and hope they reciprocate (as they've verbally convinced) or do you walk?

 

[Scotsman]

Great post scots...question for you...when you realize it's not reciprocated and you actually confide in them and beg for that....at what point do you just walk away? Let's say they tell you over and over again that they love you? That they are going to try...that they will change...that they want to be with you? Do you continue to give and hope they reciprocate (as they've verbally convinced) or do you walk?

Telling you they love you means nothing really, it's a convenient way of not having to show you they love you. If you have to beg then you are doomed already, if you mention something to someone one time and they don't respond it obviously isn't important to them. People don't change really, and someone trying to change for you will eventually make them resentful that you don't love them how they are. If someone keeps giving you the song and dance routine then walk, there are plenty of people out there who would be willing to, all you have to do is find them.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[habitualhealth]

lol yeah whatever
but anyway......its hard for me sometimes to post how i feel about things....its like my mind and my hands work on different levels lol

I was being serious weirdo!! Your post was really good gomer.

 

[SoKlueles]

I was being serious weirdo!! Your post was really good gomer.

well i was too lol