To all you married folks...how many do we have here?

[Night Fly]

I am just curious. I was talking with a friend of mine tonight about this.

Relationships, in general, are tough. They all require work, no doubt. What do you married folks think is the most difficult thing that you deal with in your marriage? How do you know when it's time to fight for something and when it's time to let it go? Rotten's post about his marriage made me think about this also.

I believe that marriage is a wonderful thing, but is only meant for the people willing to give it their all. I only want to get married once. I never want to get divorced...but I mean, who gets married expecting that it will end like that? With that attitude I may never get married...but I hope not.

Can you all tell me the pros and cons that you all have personally experienced? I am really interested to know about this.

Thanks!

 

[Citruscide]

Marriage is a horrible horrible thing. Less than 25% of the people who are married, are HAPPY. If you have any sort of attitude, don't get married, you'll only contribute to the problem of unhappy couples and clutter the courts with such trifling issues as divorce.

In life, you must be happy with yourself, and your status, before you can be happy with another. For most, it takes until you are around 30 to be comfortable... some 40 before they are happy with the work they have put into life... shit, some people are never happy.

Marriage is an institution that should never exist. I'm sorry... it shouldn't. For those of you who are married... great job, for those of you who have children, congradulations.. odds are you will split and now not only have split-home kids, but have also contributed to the growing population problem.

C-ditty

 

[JOKER47]

S'ma wife in my avatar.

As far as needing to know when something is worth fighting for, I knew I was ready to re-marry when there was nothing I wouldn't do, well almost nothing, to keep this girl in my life.

I learned the most from my divorce. I learned what to look for, and what not to look for. I learned not to change for anyone.

When my current wife and I decided to get married, there was no question. I didn't have to think about it, it felt completely natural.

Marriage is not easy. We have our ups and downs. LOTS of downs, too. We fight, argue, disagree, etc....But the thought of us not being together never enters our mond. Each confrontation is looked at like just something that we need to go through. The trick we found, is not to go through these things more than once. I think lots of divorces happen becuase issue come up over and over, and never get solved. Eventually, both sides give up.

I honestly believe that when you meet the right person, you know. Now that I look back, I never should have married my first wife. But, I knew I had to marry my second.

Sorry for the ramble....

Joker

 

[Bigsatan13]

NF, here it is. It's about establishing what you expect from each other and living up to it. When my wife and I exchanged vows we were serious about them and keep them. Before we were married I said my expectations and what would happen if they were not met and she did the same.


C, wtf? Have you been with the wrong women? My wife and I have been through some real tough times and some of the greatest times together. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

 

[HumorMe]

Relationships, in general, are tough. They all require work, no doubt. What do you married folks think is the most difficult thing that you deal with in your marriage? How do you know when it's time to fight for something and when it's time to let it go? Rotten's post about his marriage made me think about this also.

I believe that marriage is a wonderful thing, but is only meant for the people willing to give it their all. I only want to get married once. I never want to get divorced...but I mean, who gets married expecting that it will end like that? With that attitude I may never get married...but I hope not.

Can you all tell me the pros and cons that you all have personally experienced? I am really interested to know about this.

Thanks!

Relationships are what you make of it. It takes both sides to make it successful. If one person gives 100% and the other one is giving 50%, well, it just won't work. Love and Marriage is loving someone more than you love yourself.

Do we have arguments or disagreements? Yes, but very few arguments and always behind closed doors and we never let the sun set on them (We don't go to bed angry with each other).

Rotten's post was a tough one. I can't really say what I would have done if I was in his shoes. Hopefully my Christian faith would help guide me through something like that.

I have been married 15 years and I am more in love with my wife than I have ever been. She's a jewel. She's everything to me. Currently, she is off her feet for the next eight weeks because of foot surgery on both feet. That leaves me to do everything. I am now realizing what she has done for the last 15 years in keeping the household together (cooking, cleaning, washing, bathing the kids, grocery shopping, etc.) I can honestly say, I have handled it very well so far. I'm frankly shocked at how well I have handled it. I have waited on her hand and foot these past two weeks as well as all of the other stuff. These things have made me realize her committment to me and the kids and the things she has sacrificed. Needless to say, things will change when she is able to walk again. I have promised her that!

These people on the boards who continually complain and bash women all of the time is very disturbing to me. I know we all go through bad relationships but some of these people are hopeless, IMO. Maybe they are presenting a fictitous personality on these boards. I have a hard time believing some of these people's hearts are that hard.

This is what we base our marriage and love for each other on:

Love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking it is not easily angered. It keeps no record. Love does not seek evil but revels in truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. I Corinthians 13:4-7

 

[b fold the truth]

Lots of good info from the married people on this thread...

B True

 

[Night Fly]

Is this all the married people that we have on this board? I think not!

 

[WODIN]

Married 15 years.

It's like flying a beat up battered sesna with holes in the wings around the world trying to set a speed record. Damn well worth it!

 

[JOKER47]

Maybe the only ones who are willing to admit it....


Joker

 

[CowboyUp]

When the right person comes along you will know. Then the real work starts. A marriage is full of give and not much take, but it is worth it. I work overseas on a 35 day rotation and this is very hard on my wife and kids as well as me. When I am home I can devote all my time to them and this somewhat makes up for the time away. No, I don't worry about her cheating, if I did I would not be married 16 years. We are friends and partners and sex is better than ever. I would not trade my marriage for anything.