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I'm soooooo bored at work!!!! Thought i'd post this.
At a wake....
So, what are you gonna do with his golf clubs?
Who do I talk to about his bar tab?
Of course you'll miss him, he didn't molest you.
How long you think until he starts to stink?
Wow! Other than his wife, is there anyone in this room he didn't bang?
Say what you will, Madame Toussot does nice work.
It's weird not seeing him drunk.
I always thought he was gay.
Isn't that suit gonna be a little warm for Hell?
So now that you're a widow, what do you do? Masturbate?
I was there when he died. Man what a baby.
Alchohol related...
I’d love to stay for last call but I want to be sharp tommorow morning at the plant.
We’re out of Crème De Menthe
As the bed began to spin, Phil, unimpressed, called God a "Faggot".
Put the beer away. We’re ice fishing.
The fireworks are beautiful. Pass the Egg Nog.
Am I getting drunk or is your huge ass shrinking?
Peanuts! Popcorn! Galliano!
They were as in love today as they were 20years ago when they met at Wet T-shirt night.
As she dropped her tray of jello shots, she gasped and clutched her bonnet. But it was too late. She had ruined her ankle-length corduroy dress.
Success and all it’s pressures had come too soon for the heavy metal band, so they kept an eye on what they drank.
And signs you need a better job....
It's okay that you're too drunk to dig.
To yell at you, your Boss needs to put in his teeth.
Your pension has a lid.
You no longer pack a taffy apple in your lunch because it keeps getting covered with pubic hair.
You yell, "Ace!" and more than one guy answers.
Your job demands legibly writing, "God Bless You".
You have to call the cans of soda you sell, "Goblets of mead".
You carry a toilet plunger on your belt.
You need help in welcoming lovely ladies to the stage.
You've learned how to run with drugs in your butt.
copyright 2000 Http://www.paulgilmartin.com
At a wake....
So, what are you gonna do with his golf clubs?
Who do I talk to about his bar tab?
Of course you'll miss him, he didn't molest you.
How long you think until he starts to stink?
Wow! Other than his wife, is there anyone in this room he didn't bang?
Say what you will, Madame Toussot does nice work.
It's weird not seeing him drunk.
I always thought he was gay.
Isn't that suit gonna be a little warm for Hell?
So now that you're a widow, what do you do? Masturbate?
I was there when he died. Man what a baby.
Alchohol related...
I’d love to stay for last call but I want to be sharp tommorow morning at the plant.
We’re out of Crème De Menthe
As the bed began to spin, Phil, unimpressed, called God a "Faggot".
Put the beer away. We’re ice fishing.
The fireworks are beautiful. Pass the Egg Nog.
Am I getting drunk or is your huge ass shrinking?
Peanuts! Popcorn! Galliano!
They were as in love today as they were 20years ago when they met at Wet T-shirt night.
As she dropped her tray of jello shots, she gasped and clutched her bonnet. But it was too late. She had ruined her ankle-length corduroy dress.
Success and all it’s pressures had come too soon for the heavy metal band, so they kept an eye on what they drank.
And signs you need a better job....
It's okay that you're too drunk to dig.
To yell at you, your Boss needs to put in his teeth.
Your pension has a lid.
You no longer pack a taffy apple in your lunch because it keeps getting covered with pubic hair.
You yell, "Ace!" and more than one guy answers.
Your job demands legibly writing, "God Bless You".
You have to call the cans of soda you sell, "Goblets of mead".
You carry a toilet plunger on your belt.
You need help in welcoming lovely ladies to the stage.
You've learned how to run with drugs in your butt.
copyright 2000 Http://www.paulgilmartin.com
