Please Scroll Down to See Forums Below all today i have been working with my dad. cleaning the boat, cleaning the car. i kept talking to him, but he never says anything back. does anyone else ever feel like they will never get their parents approval? my dad never smiles at me, unless he's making fun of me. how can i tell him he keeps hurting me?
smile
- Thread starter daised
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satanic goatslayer
New member
daised said:
Hurt him back.
Make a shank out of some chopsticks and shove one in his eye socket and another in his back. If he continues to mock you, choke him out and defecate on his lifeless corpse.
Tell him to get off of your sacroiliac rapsack backpack.
no, i just am having a bad day, because i finally reallised that whenever my dad is drunk - he's proud of me; but whenever he's sober- he's mad at me.
you may think this is an exageration, but every time my dad gets drunk he tells me how good of a kid i am
i can't think of the last time he said something nice to me when he was sober
you may think this is an exageration, but every time my dad gets drunk he tells me how good of a kid i am
i can't think of the last time he said something nice to me when he was sober
MuSuLPhReAk
New member
daised said:
I refer to mine as "The Troll"
bouncer
New member
It's probably too late for your father. I gave up on mine years ago, when I was old enough to take up for my mother after yet another beating. Even now at 35 year's old I get very fucking agry at the memories. Anyway, now that I'm a father of two children and happily married I bend over backwards not to be like him. I don't buy into this shite that children coming from an abusive home grow up to think it's ok to be the abuser too.
Just remember your feelings now and make the same promise I did to make our own children be proud of every moment they have with us. As a child I never knew what it was like to be brought out fishing, long drives, movies, dinner etc... now I take every oppertunity to do these things with my two children. Try do the same.
Our father's came from a different time than we did. It was normal to be the hard assed bastard our father's are now. But that bullshite belongs in anicent history.
Forgive me for making this a little scattered, but I find it very hard to remain unmoved when I start to dig into my childhood memories. I know what your feeling, I only started to get on somewhat with my father when I joined the army and left home. Maybe when you get some distance between you both things will be different. PLease god.
Bouncer
Just remember your feelings now and make the same promise I did to make our own children be proud of every moment they have with us. As a child I never knew what it was like to be brought out fishing, long drives, movies, dinner etc... now I take every oppertunity to do these things with my two children. Try do the same.
Our father's came from a different time than we did. It was normal to be the hard assed bastard our father's are now. But that bullshite belongs in anicent history.
Forgive me for making this a little scattered, but I find it very hard to remain unmoved when I start to dig into my childhood memories. I know what your feeling, I only started to get on somewhat with my father when I joined the army and left home. Maybe when you get some distance between you both things will be different. PLease god.
Bouncer
the nature boy
New member
daised said:
why don't you just go up to him and tell him. it's that simple.
B
Balls of Steel
Guest
My parents give me too much attention. I cant stand it....I wish they would leave me alone.
bouncer
New member
I should have said, I'd never have the balls to approach my father and tell him how I felt, because I'm afraid where that would bring me.
If you have the balls and the hurt is'nt so unforgivable do like the guys say and tell him how your feeling.
But post the result of your conversation here please, I'd be very interested.
Bouncer
If you have the balls and the hurt is'nt so unforgivable do like the guys say and tell him how your feeling.
But post the result of your conversation here please, I'd be very interested.
Bouncer
my dad and i use to be close, but when he got a better job he would buy me things to make up for time missed. everytime i try and tell him how i feel, he switches it around to - well it's hard to praise you when you keep fucking up.
i will never be like him or my mother.
he doesn't deserve my mom
i will never be like him or my mother.
he doesn't deserve my mom
daised said:
He's touchy and he takes it too personally when you try to have an open honest talk with him.
That's not your fault...
It's kinda like he knows he's guilty but you're not supposed to have noticed it...definitely you're not supposed to say it out loud...
Your main priority is to figure out how not to let him mess up YOUR life because of his own guilt, insecurities, etc.
You can try to tell him what you'd like to but as you know, it might not work. The only person we can really control at all is us. And that's hard enuf LOL
I try to remember that the people who hurt me have their own problems; sometimes they are a lot worse than mine actually. I just met a woman this week with 7 kids...then I saw her again yesterday found out she's a widow...so she's raising them without a husband...
Try to remember your Dad is a real person...after all that's how you'd like him to think of you isn't it? He's probably as desperate for your approval as you are for his...
Good luck...
love
Helen
How old are you and what gender are you?
It doesn't sound like your father is abusive to you in any way from what you have shared with us. I don't see why you're so bent over it. I'm sure he just feels uncomfortable expressing his feelings towards you. When he's drunk his inhibitions are lowered, he opens up. I'm sure when you're not around and he's discussing you with other people, he speaks favorably about you. The only time I have really good conversations with my pops is when we are talking about a subject we can both relate to and are interested in, which is pretty damn rare. I'm sure when he speaks "negatively" towards you, he's only trying to wisen you up and make you a better person. If you're fucking up, what do you expect him to say?
Hey, I noticed you got a D on your report card. I know you can do better than that. You just have to try harder next time.
Well that was an unexpected trip to the police station in the middle of the night. Hopefully you've learned your lesson. I know you're smart enough to avoid another situation like this in future. Let's go grab some breakfast at Denny's, my treat.
If I heard shit like that growing up, I'd be dating my cellmate right now and punking the fish out of their care packages and toothbrushes. I think more people would respond better to some sort of punishment, some verbal lashing, and maybe a good smack in the chops. Needless to say, I don't come from a "go take a timeout" family. A little tough love can go a long way and help you build some character and a backbone. Sure our parents came from a different time, when things were different. As each generation reproduces, I can't help but think we are breeding a softer, pussified, crybaby society. It grows softer with each new generation. Maybe a big war or a nasty recession is just what we need to help curve this epidemic sweeping the civilized world, in a twisted sort of way.
Now if he beats the shit out of you for no reason or touches your butthole or something, well that would be a totally different story.
I was assuming you are a male, so if you are a female or an effeminate gay man, than you should disregard a lot of what I said.
It doesn't sound like your father is abusive to you in any way from what you have shared with us. I don't see why you're so bent over it. I'm sure he just feels uncomfortable expressing his feelings towards you. When he's drunk his inhibitions are lowered, he opens up. I'm sure when you're not around and he's discussing you with other people, he speaks favorably about you. The only time I have really good conversations with my pops is when we are talking about a subject we can both relate to and are interested in, which is pretty damn rare. I'm sure when he speaks "negatively" towards you, he's only trying to wisen you up and make you a better person. If you're fucking up, what do you expect him to say?
Hey, I noticed you got a D on your report card. I know you can do better than that. You just have to try harder next time.
Well that was an unexpected trip to the police station in the middle of the night. Hopefully you've learned your lesson. I know you're smart enough to avoid another situation like this in future. Let's go grab some breakfast at Denny's, my treat.
If I heard shit like that growing up, I'd be dating my cellmate right now and punking the fish out of their care packages and toothbrushes. I think more people would respond better to some sort of punishment, some verbal lashing, and maybe a good smack in the chops. Needless to say, I don't come from a "go take a timeout" family. A little tough love can go a long way and help you build some character and a backbone. Sure our parents came from a different time, when things were different. As each generation reproduces, I can't help but think we are breeding a softer, pussified, crybaby society. It grows softer with each new generation. Maybe a big war or a nasty recession is just what we need to help curve this epidemic sweeping the civilized world, in a twisted sort of way.
Now if he beats the shit out of you for no reason or touches your butthole or something, well that would be a totally different story.
I was assuming you are a male, so if you are a female or an effeminate gay man, than you should disregard a lot of what I said.
Lord_Suston
New member
Look stop complaining and tell him, if he changes good, if not then you tryed... It your life, not his any more, got it!!!!!!
i's hard because he says he'll stop drinking, and i believe him he'll stop for a coule months and then it starts agian. i never know how to act when i get home. i odn't know if my dad will be drunk or not. i don't know if he'll be in a good mood or bad mood. i live evryday by trying to stay away from him. and as much as i would like to say he doesn't matter to me- he does, and that's why i'm so hurt. he always tells me he's disappointed in me, when is my turn to tell him i'm disappointed?
M
MoneyBags
Guest
daised said:
maybe you should stop being such a disappointment.
