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- Thread starter anthrax
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PBR
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i think we tend to vent here most of the time when it comes to this subject...we all go thru various stumbling blocks and complaints from time to time, and this seems to be a venue for getting it out...relationships are still an uncharted territory...we spend so much of our lives trying to figure out the opposite sex...this is because we were never really taught how to do it...we learn from others who are making the same mistakes and the dreadful media...how can we possibly learn from all the negative reinforcement??...its an individual experience that comes with trial and error...the average age factor here (on this site) has alot to do with the results and experiences that are currently being played out...even the books you read on relationships have alot to be desired: take Beverly DeAngelo, who has written 3 or more books on relationships, she has been married 7-8 times.....WTF???
you must learn about yourself first before bringing someone else into your life, then it becomes acceptance of human nature and understanding...of yourself and the other person...until this is fully understood by an individual, they will be doomed for failure, but again its a learning experience and not really failure IMO....tho painful at times.
you must learn about yourself first before bringing someone else into your life, then it becomes acceptance of human nature and understanding...of yourself and the other person...until this is fully understood by an individual, they will be doomed for failure, but again its a learning experience and not really failure IMO....tho painful at times.
Anthrax said:
What you see on EF C&C is NOT an accurate representation of relationships. What you have here is a microcosm of a sample population, by no means an accurate or scientific sample. People don't usually make threads boasting about how great their marriages are, but they are quick on the other hand to create threads when things are not going well. That's human nature, to some degree we all take things for granted, including our healthy relationships.
DIV
Anthrax said:
I think men are getting married too early and that account for the 50/50 split. When men are older and grounded and decide to get married they usually stay married. Women who marry young are likely to stay married if they are the determining factor and not the Man. Women tend to want to sustain the marriage until all attempts are exhausted. That's why you have such a wide disparity for percentage of marriages that end in divorce for women 45 and under.
Don't consider EF a model of consistency in terms of marriage statistics.
Too much variance......
DIV
strangebrew
New member
While I hate to say it, I think a lot of it has to with people having no moral values these days.
My parents will never get divorced. My brother and his wife will never get divorced. My sister and her husband will never get divorced.
They all have one thing in common.
My parents will never get divorced. My brother and his wife will never get divorced. My sister and her husband will never get divorced.
They all have one thing in common.
biteme said:
biteme......with all due respect: If you give women the ability to hurt you, then you are likely to hurt you. Women are very sadistic emotionally, they don't reason in that way, they use their own justifications for what they do, and that is independent of reason.
All is fair in love and war, nugga.....
DIV
U
Ulcasterdropout
Guest
Why do people on this board stay fit?
There's your answer.
There's your answer.
StickFigure
New member
At this point in my life i am definately not the one to answer that question! 
needtogrow
New member
Know a days when things get heated in a marrige, men and women head for the door.
I will step up for the "marrige can work crowd" and say if couples will focus their energy on how to work together and compromise alot of marrige would survive.
I am 31 years old and have been marrried for 8 1/2 years. We have are ups and downs, but we never just give up. I'm glad my wife is a trooper, and its nice to think we have a pretty good chance to be one of the old couples you see that have been togoether 50+ years.
So yes marrige can last if couples are willing to put an effort into it.
P.S. wish us the best over the next 40 or so years
I will step up for the "marrige can work crowd" and say if couples will focus their energy on how to work together and compromise alot of marrige would survive.
I am 31 years old and have been marrried for 8 1/2 years. We have are ups and downs, but we never just give up. I'm glad my wife is a trooper, and its nice to think we have a pretty good chance to be one of the old couples you see that have been togoether 50+ years.
So yes marrige can last if couples are willing to put an effort into it.
P.S. wish us the best over the next 40 or so years
U
Ulcasterdropout
Guest
I got all that shit...
U
Ulcasterdropout
Guest
Genetics.samoth said:Why?
Growth&Courage
New member
Anthrax said:
It is not doomed to failure but it appears that divorce is increasingly being opt for if the other option is to mutually work together to reconcile the marriage and restore what was at stake.
Marriage must be seen like a bonsai* tree. Everyday you give it some love, nurture it and you shape it the way you want taking into account its response, growth and development. If you twist it too fast or too slow you will upset the beauty of it. It is a mutual process based on principles of reciprocation and commitment; when such is succeeded the sustaining of marriage is possible.
However, should marriage ever be question, divorce will always be there as a possible choice and indeed one that is highly sought after as supposed to long hours of structured reconciliation with attempts to be more 'understanding' , 'empathic', 'committed' - all of which entails a great deal of persistency, effort and important to note an unguaranteed success. Perhaps a series of improvements may be the results but to what extent will it be restored to its original state is unsure baring in mind that the foundation of marriage has already been challenged and supposedly once thought to be cherished, secured, rewarding and everlasting.
Based on statistical evidence and by means of extrapoliation I suspect more than ever that the trend in divorce will produce dramatic changes in societal values, structure, economy through to the day-to-day engagments within the next 10-20 years or so.
*For those of you who are not not familiar with bonsai, here is a link to the sorts of shape, variations and sizes possible whilst attating its beauty:
http://images.google.co.th/images?hl=en&lr=&safe=off&q=bonsai&btnG=Search
Your other question was well covered by Division.
thanks for reading.
YASMINA said:
YASMINA, you missed the whole point of my post.
What I *meant* was that in any ideal relationship that's worthy of your time you will get what you give. ALWAYS.
Sorry to be so vague.
Of course in reality it doesn't always work that way, but ideally any person you give your time should meet you halfway in all things.
DIV
I think every relationship has it's moments but that doesn't mean they're doomed to fail. I'm not just talking about romantic relationships either. Moving forward isn't always easy to do and growing and changing with another person takes a lot of work. Love isn't always a feeling. A lot of times it's a choice. It's a choice to hold your tongue at times, speak your mind at times, and be willing to make sacrifices sometimes without being bitter. We're probably more inclined to vocalize what's going on when they're bad. It's hard to hold emotions in when things are rough.
...but sometimes I can barely contain myself though because I'm so happy. A couple of days ago I was pondering posting that I was just completely and totally content with my life. I figured I'd mostly get BS posts in response though but I'm in love with my best friend and I love my life.
Sure there are times when we really piss each other off. Everyone is a pain in the ass sometimes, but if you're happy a lot more than you're miserable, then all is well. Life isn't perfect. People aren't perfect. Accepting that things are that way will make you much more content in life.
...but sometimes I can barely contain myself though because I'm so happy. A couple of days ago I was pondering posting that I was just completely and totally content with my life. I figured I'd mostly get BS posts in response though but I'm in love with my best friend and I love my life.
Sure there are times when we really piss each other off. Everyone is a pain in the ass sometimes, but if you're happy a lot more than you're miserable, then all is well. Life isn't perfect. People aren't perfect. Accepting that things are that way will make you much more content in life.
wnt2bBeast
New member
danielson said:
Damn that is so true..
so simple but yet (for me anyway) very hard to find..i found it but other events made it too difficult to hold on to
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