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a little comic relief.
Two brand new additions to the periodic table of chemical elements:
Element Name: WOMAN
Symbol: WO
Atomic Weight: (don't even go there!)
Physical properties: Generally round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze at any time. Melts whenever treated properly. Very bitter if mishandled.
Chemical properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Volatile when left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when placed next to a shinier specimen. When saturated with alcohol, will mix with anything.
Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.
Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.
Element Name: MAN
Symbol: MA
Atomic Weight: (180 +/-180)
Physical properties: Solid at room temperature but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.
Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also, tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with KID (Element: Child) for prolonged period of time. Neutralize by saturating with alcohol and antacid.
Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good specimens are able to
produce large quantities on command.
Caution: In the absence of any WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell.
Two brand new additions to the periodic table of chemical elements:
Element Name: WOMAN
Symbol: WO
Atomic Weight: (don't even go there!)
Physical properties: Generally round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze at any time. Melts whenever treated properly. Very bitter if mishandled.
Chemical properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Volatile when left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when placed next to a shinier specimen. When saturated with alcohol, will mix with anything.
Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.
Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.
Element Name: MAN
Symbol: MA
Atomic Weight: (180 +/-180)
Physical properties: Solid at room temperature but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.
Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also, tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with KID (Element: Child) for prolonged period of time. Neutralize by saturating with alcohol and antacid.
Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good specimens are able to
produce large quantities on command.
Caution: In the absence of any WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell.
