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My new girlfriend

J

jerseyart

Jaded Seal of Approval
Platinum
Is a former Penthouse Pet of the year. She's gorgeous, and I think she is really into me. We've only ever talked on the phone, but we are meeting up on the 16th. Wish me luck.

I hope this thread serves as encouragement to all the other guys out there currently without female companionship. There is hope bro's, you just gotta believe. Look at me, I'll be your inspiration
 
MrMuscle said:
this thread is useless without pics
Click to expand...


OH wait... You can conviently show us old Penthouse pics of her for proof. lol

Even if they`re in black and white.

lol jk around bro. I know you`re gay.
 
Ejac,

Watch it bitch. That's the woman I love

GL: Don't be jealous. Is it so terrible I've found some happiness in a woman that loves me
 
Thanks Y Lifter

It's a little soon for wedding announcements. But you never know
 
Mr. Muscle

Isn't she gorgeous.

If you want, I can ask her is she knows any of the other models on that site. Maybe she has a friend
 
I'll ask if she knows those girls MM

Bilepuke: Shut up troll. I was never a singer. You're just making shit up.

Just cause you can't get a date loser, doesn't mean you have to hate those of us who can. Maybe if you showed a little initiative. Look at me. I just called a penthouse pet out of the blue. How many guys would have the cajones to do that? She was obviously impressed with my courage, and enthralled by my voice. Even when I gave her my CC#, I suppose so she could verify I wasn't just some nameless freak, she made me repeat the number twice. Obviously she digs the way I sound
 
Send her someone elses picture. By the time you meet in person it will be to late for her to back out. Mercy sex is still sex.
 
dougly. I don't care what you say about me, but watch what you say about Zazel. She's not like that.

FFactor You must eb thinking of someone else. Zazel is a health freak. She loves taking long walks on the beach, and is only modeling to put herself through medical school. She loves children and small animals, and her greatest desire is for world peace. She's so wonderful. I think she is still a virgin too. When I asked if there was anyone else in her life, she assured me she has been waiting for me to come along. It's like fate brought us together
 
WTF.. You send me PM's stating!

JerseyArt said:
I'll bring my Daisy Dukes and my high heels, have my hair in pig tails and be smacking my gum for ya tuts.
Click to expand...

And then I return from lunch and find this thread :confused:

I take it back all of it, and delete all those pictures too.
 
OMGWTF

Listen darlin. I can explain all of this. Just give me a chance. It was all a joke. You know your the only Pet for me. Frisky, baby, are you still there?
 
JerseyFart said:
I'll bring my Daisy Dukes and my high heels, have my hair in pig tails and be smacking my gum for ya tuts.
Click to expand...


He sent me the same PM... (I think he might be :giegh: ) :worried:
 
The Ejaculator said:
He sent me the same PM... (I think he might be :giegh: ) :worried:
Click to expand...

OMFG :worried:
 
Omfg
 
JerseyArt said:
OMGWTF

Listen darlin. I can explain all of this. Just give me a chance. It was all a joke. You know your the only Pet for me. Frisky, baby, are you still there?
Click to expand...

Explain :rolleyes:
 
Ok this is exaclty what happened.

I was at work, minding my own business, doing you know...work stuf..when GL,Perkele, and Ejac (who is a man loving stalker by the way) PM me with the idea for this thread. Of course I'm like no way, that's chauvanistic and wrong, and it also violates my deeply held Christian ideals. But they are all like you better or we will kick your ass. And still I said no, and responded "Listen guys,women should be respected for their bodies, minds, and souls, and not dismissed as play things for our sexual amusement. That kind of thread would send the wrong message." But then they were all like "you better do it, or else we'll kick soft furry little animals like puppies or cats"

Babe, you know how much I love animals. You can imagine my dilemna. I resisted, but then they sent me pics of the animals they planned on torturing, and my heart broke at the thought. So I caved into their eveil plan. I don't know what I was thinking. I was distraught with the emotional abuse and threats of violence.

So really, you shouldn't be mad at me, but at them. What do you think we should do? Call the authorities? I leave it in your capable hands
 
.







That's it you assnozzle....

<----------------- The dog gets it when I get home :evil:



JerseyArt said:
Ok this is exaclty what happened.

I was at work, minding my own business, doing you know...work stuf..when GL,Perkele, and Ejac (who is a man loving stalker by the way) PM me with the idea for this thread. Of course I'm like no way, that's chauvanistic and wrong, and it also violates my deeply held Christian ideals. But they are all like you better or we will kick your ass. And still I said no, and responded "Listen guys,women should be respected for their bodies, minds, and souls, and not dismissed as play things for our sexual amusement. That kind of thread would send the wrong message." But then they were all like "you better do it, or else we'll kick soft furry little animals like puppies or cats"

Babe, you know how much I love animals. You can imagine my dilemna. I resisted, but then they sent me pics of the animals they planned on torturing, and my heart broke at the thought. So I caved into their eveil plan. I don't know what I was thinking. I was distraught with the emotional abuse and threats of violence.

So really, you shouldn't be mad at me, but at them. What do you think we should do? Call the authorities? I leave it in your capable hands
Click to expand...
 
JerseyArt said:
Ok this is exaclty what happened.

I was at work, minding my own business, doing you know...work stuf..when GL,Perkele, and Ejac (who is a man loving stalker by the way) PM me with the idea for this thread. Of course I'm like no way, that's chauvanistic and wrong, and it also violates my deeply held Christian ideals. But they are all like you better or we will kick your ass. And still I said no, and responded "Listen guys,women should be respected for their bodies, minds, and souls, and not dismissed as play things for our sexual amusement. That kind of thread would send the wrong message." But then they were all like "you better do it, or else we'll kick soft furry little animals like puppies or cats"

Babe, you know how much I love animals. You can imagine my dilemna. I resisted, but then they sent me pics of the animals they planned on torturing, and my heart broke at the thought. So I caved into their eveil plan. I don't know what I was thinking. I was distraught with the emotional abuse and threats of violence.

So really, you shouldn't be mad at me, but at them. What do you think we should do? Call the authorities? I leave it in your capable hands
Click to expand...

You too??? Did you see what they did to my kitty? And now that poor dog in Ejac's Avatar. Well I believe we need to leave the authorities out of this and take it into our own hands. :evil: I can be a Vindictive Bitch, esp when you fuck with my kitty.
 
friskygrl2004 said:
You too??? Did you see what they did to my kitty? And now that poor dog in Ejac's Avatar. Well I believe we need to leave the authorities out of this and take it into our own hands. :evil: I can be a Vindictive Bitch, esp when you fuck with my kitty.
Click to expand...


OMG

That post was such a turn on...

I mean...yeah...no one should fuck with your kitty...bastards. I wish I could pet your kitty
 
GG

Sounds like someone wants to trade
 
At least she didn't do years of anonymous bukake with borderline convicts to get to be pet of the year. Sounds like a classy gal.
 
most "penthouse pets" can be found dancing at your local strip club "on tour".

they're over-rated. In fact, most sleep around more than porn stars (eg: strip club owners, dj's, agents, etc.), and they have a lot less money then porn stars who at least are famous, rich and can have very lucrative websites.

Only less than 1% of them can pull off a Carmen Electra or Pamela Anderson or Jenny McCarthy career.
 
TheProject said:
It is? Where's the funny part?
Click to expand...


The whole thing. This story of is so intentionllly full of shit it's obvious. And people are like "I'm calling bullshit". Saying this story is full of shit is like saying the sky is blue. I don't know why anyone is even bothering to question the validity of the story.
 
Razorguns said:
most "penthouse pets" can be found dancing at your local strip club "on tour".

they're over-rated. In fact, most sleep around more than porn stars (eg: strip club owners, dj's, agents, etc.), and they have a lot less money then porn stars who at least are famous, rich and can have very lucrative websites.

Only less than 1% of them can pull off a Carmen Electra or Pamela Anderson or Jenny McCarthy career.
Click to expand...

True. My oldest friend's sister was a pet. She has sucked and fucked her way from san diego to carmel
 
The Nature Boy said:
The whole thing. This story of is so intentionllly full of shit it's obvious. And people are like "I'm calling bullshit". Saying this story is full of shit is like saying the sky is blue. I don't know why anyone is even bothering to question the validity of the story.
Click to expand...

LOL

Best post of the whole thread right here.
 
You really do have to beat some people over the head for them to "get it."
 
JerseyArt said:
dougly. I don't care what you say about me, but watch what you say about Zazel. She's not like that.

FFactor You must eb thinking of someone else. Zazel is a health freak. She loves taking long walks on the beach, and is only modeling to put herself through medical school. She loves children and small animals, and her greatest desire is for world peace. She's so wonderful. I think she is still a virgin too. When I asked if there was anyone else in her life, she assured me she has been waiting for me to come along. It's like fate brought us together
Click to expand...
dude no offense bro but i hope u will take this to heart and consider it.

You are fucking head over heals for a penthouse star who you haev NEVER met and think that its your fate to marry her and take her virginity. Reality check plz
 
JerseyArt said:
You really do have to beat some people over the head for them to "get it."
Click to expand...
its your own fault. most people proabbly saw ur rediculous threads and couldn't get past page 1 to know it was a joke be4 responding....... i know thats what happened to me!
 
Have her hold up a "Jerseyart" sign in her next centerfold pic.
 
Boardin087 said:
dude no offense bro but i hope u will take this to heart and consider it.

You are fucking head over heals for a penthouse star who you haev NEVER met and think that its your fate to marry her and take her virginity. Reality check plz
Click to expand...
LMFAO

This is a prime candidate for gullible of the year award!
 
Boardin: Sorry orb, I don't know what I was thinking

Did you guys catch the way frisky and GG were sweating me.

I'm so in
 
JerseyArt said:
Ok this is exaclty what happened.

I was at work, minding my own business, doing you know...work stuf..when GL,Perkele, and Ejac (who is a man loving stalker by the way) PM me with the idea for this thread. Of course I'm like no way, that's chauvanistic and wrong, and it also violates my deeply held Christian ideals. But they are all like you better or we will kick your ass. And still I said no, and responded "Listen guys,women should be respected for their bodies, minds, and souls, and not dismissed as play things for our sexual amusement. That kind of thread would send the wrong message." But then they were all like "you better do it, or else we'll kick soft furry little animals like puppies or cats"

Babe, you know how much I love animals. You can imagine my dilemna. I resisted, but then they sent me pics of the animals they planned on torturing, and my heart broke at the thought. So I caved into their eveil plan. I don't know what I was thinking. I was distraught with the emotional abuse and threats of violence.

So really, you shouldn't be mad at me, but at them. What do you think we should do? Call the authorities? I leave it in your capable hands
Click to expand...


That`s it, I`m choking the first chicken I see.
 
JerseyArt said:
Even when I gave her my CC#, I suppose so she could verify I wasn't just some nameless freak, she made me repeat the number twice. Obviously she digs the way I sound
Click to expand...

I was thinking cell phone number until I realized you meant credit card number. This whole thread is a major jape. You raised this to a whole new level bor. :artist:
 
Wynn,

The hotties be sweatin us Petreans
 
I`m not buying this. Will she come to the EF meeting?
 
Hmmm


I called her to ask, but she apparently has other plans that evening. It seems as though she has many male friends.

I asked her point blank if I should be worried, but she assures me that what we have is special, so I feel much better. She's amazing.
 
Shut up SK

She's 95% real flesh and bone woman
 
JerseyArt said:
Shut up SK

She's 95% real flesh and bone woman
Click to expand...
omg u told me to shut up? it looks like the i :heart: soklueles avatar needs to come out again to put u back in ur place
 
Omfg
 
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