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Cal_21
New member
So everyone knows how young kids go through the age old debate of "Is Santa real?"... A few years back I found out the answer. And it wasn't pretty...And probably not what you think...
I lost faith, I believed he was bullshit...Until that one fateful night.
Dec 24th, 2000 (I was 14)
I hear a noise upon the roof. It stirs me from my mattress in the corner...I pick the lock on the cage with the bone of a dead mouse. He was my only friend until I was forced to eat him or starve to death. I proceed to investigate...
I hear a loud crash...A greasy man in a red suit with a white beard with the faintest trace of vomit crusted @ the bottom of his lip.
He reeks of vicodin, Seagram's Gin and stale donut holes.
I cry out for help, but no one can hear me. He walks right up to me...
He tells me I've been a bad little boy in a maniacal fashion as he grabbed me by the scruff of my collar (Shock collar).
I stab his testicle with the splintered rat bone from earlier...
He grimaces in pain and his rage grows like a wave of locusts...like the heat of a mid-nineteenth century South Carolina sun...beating down on the minced flesh in the cotton fields.
There was no time to think...it was him or me. I grabbed the telephone cord and I wrapped it around his chubby, pop-marked, neck. I leaned back with all my might. I felt his dirty fingernails tear at my hands, my wrists, he dug his nubby fingers into my eyes...I felt the blood from my tears hit the nape of his throbbing neck. Each tear burned like acid as it hit his slimy pink flesh and pooled at the white cotton trim of his shirt. His struggling became more frantic, then all of the sudden it's like the lives of all those he's corrupted. All of the life force he fed off of for so many years all escaped from his soul. He grew limp, and weak. As he fell to the floor, I ran to get a fire poker to finish the job...to ensure he would never hurt me or anyone else.
The blood droplets from my eyes were finally dissipating...I saw his round face, blood vessels in his eyes busted...I hit him in his temple with the fire poker half a dozen times or so. After which his hat fell off...at this point the shock ran through my spine like a flash of Oklahoma lightening before the tornado touches down....I recognized this beast...Uncle Ralph? ....
(In response to the comments in the new "Shock Value" thread) lol
I lost faith, I believed he was bullshit...Until that one fateful night.
Dec 24th, 2000 (I was 14)
I hear a noise upon the roof. It stirs me from my mattress in the corner...I pick the lock on the cage with the bone of a dead mouse. He was my only friend until I was forced to eat him or starve to death. I proceed to investigate...
I hear a loud crash...A greasy man in a red suit with a white beard with the faintest trace of vomit crusted @ the bottom of his lip.
He reeks of vicodin, Seagram's Gin and stale donut holes.
I cry out for help, but no one can hear me. He walks right up to me...
He tells me I've been a bad little boy in a maniacal fashion as he grabbed me by the scruff of my collar (Shock collar).
I stab his testicle with the splintered rat bone from earlier...
He grimaces in pain and his rage grows like a wave of locusts...like the heat of a mid-nineteenth century South Carolina sun...beating down on the minced flesh in the cotton fields.
There was no time to think...it was him or me. I grabbed the telephone cord and I wrapped it around his chubby, pop-marked, neck. I leaned back with all my might. I felt his dirty fingernails tear at my hands, my wrists, he dug his nubby fingers into my eyes...I felt the blood from my tears hit the nape of his throbbing neck. Each tear burned like acid as it hit his slimy pink flesh and pooled at the white cotton trim of his shirt. His struggling became more frantic, then all of the sudden it's like the lives of all those he's corrupted. All of the life force he fed off of for so many years all escaped from his soul. He grew limp, and weak. As he fell to the floor, I ran to get a fire poker to finish the job...to ensure he would never hurt me or anyone else.
The blood droplets from my eyes were finally dissipating...I saw his round face, blood vessels in his eyes busted...I hit him in his temple with the fire poker half a dozen times or so. After which his hat fell off...at this point the shock ran through my spine like a flash of Oklahoma lightening before the tornado touches down....I recognized this beast...Uncle Ralph? ....
(In response to the comments in the new "Shock Value" thread) lol
