Mullets = Child Abuse?

[the nature boy]

The Infantullet
It definitely raises ethical issues. It's a defenseless child, being shaped and "mullded" into a life knowing nothing other than the mullet. It will only be a few years before this poor child ends up just another category in Mullet Junky.

*It also must be said that the Infantullet is the rarest, purest form of the mullet. It is rare for a child under the age of 1 to have an entire head of hair, much less a full-blown mullet.

 

[the nature boy]

Classic Child Mullet

It's an ideal day for School Pictures...Perfectly pressed shirt, brushed teeth, and a clean, natural mullet.

What a priceless example of the Standard Child Mullet. There's just no better representation possible. It's a classic indeed.

 

[the nature boy]

Mulla-nino

For some reason, parents have this innate need for their offspring to be,"more like them". It's clear that Mullatinos cherish these values as well. Just as the mental image of their babies growing up someday, driving El Caminos and livin' la vida loca, the perfect detail of a long, flowing mullet cannot escape their dreams. Too appealing an idea for eager parents to pass by, los ninos begin growing their mullets early.

* Notice the extra long bit at the very bottom of this magnificent plummage. Judging this growth pattern, I believe this Child Mullatino was originally a standard Rat Tail.

 

[the nature boy]

Christmas Morning Mullet

Trans Am and Camaro Hotwheels filled the stocking this year. (A foreshadowing, if you will.)

 

[the nature boy]

Child Pit Mullet

This is a very healthy mullet that has excellent shape and volume. He knows it, and he's not afraid to let you know it.

*Approach with caution: When sensing danger, instinct tells this mull to bite at the leg.

 

[polarpixie]

Nature!!! you were such a cute little baby!!!

 

[the nature boy]

Nature!!! you were such a cute little baby!!!

aw shucks sweetie. my child is going to have a lil' mullet, just like his pops.

 

[supersizeme]

NB you will one day tell your son, "DUDE, YOU'RE GETTIN A MULLET!!!"

 

[polarpixie]

**note to self: Nature Boy never grew out of his childhood mullet....DANGER DANGER....**

Um...YEAH Nature, you are gonna have one hell of a cute kid!!!

 

[FreeballinDC]

NB,

I am really beginning to think you need some major therapy over your mullet issues.

Were you traumatized in some way while on a road trip through Murralun?

Did your parents make you stay at your cousin Bubba's house one summer?

These secrets must be revealed before any true reconciliation with the past can begin