Mother's "advice" - AARGH!

[Sassy69]

BG --
your mom would be very proud of the very beautiful person that you are!
I think regardless of what we hear from our parents, or what we think they think, we can still be proud of ourselves for 1) pursuing something we believe in and 2) going for the healthy life and educating ourselves to improve that.

 

[FitFossil]

I guess when people do notice your gains, and you are on an AS....nice to know you are getting your moneys worth anyway

ann:

For the record, I have never taken AS (and not sure where you got that idea). Not passing judgement on those who do, but I have not come to that bridge yet, and may never, who knows.

Yes, people have asked me if I've taken them. On one hand, I take that as a compliment, but on the other it makes me mad that people think that any woman with just the tiniest bit of muscle, didn't do it by lifting and diet alone. (OK, I do use protein powder/bars, multi-vits, ZMA, alpha lipoic acid, flaxseed oil, and fat burners...but that's hardly AS! I also take pantothenic acid (vit B5) for my skin.

Surprisingly, most of those who've asked me this happen to be men. MEN, who happen to have 10 TIMES the amount of testosterone coursing NATURALLY through their veins than I do! Go figure

 

[ann]

FitFossil--- I was making more of a general comment...not to anyone in particular. Sorry for any misunderstanding there. I guess I should of rephrased it " glad I know I am getting my moneys worth, when people notice my size". Kudos to you on doing it naturally

 

[Fatback]

Mothers and daughters what a strange relationship. Funny, this is the one area where I think my mom actually gets a kick out of the fact I get up a 5am to workout and am so dedicated. I think she actually gets a thrill telling her friends, almost like bragging rights.

 

[MS]

I wish I had your problem. Last time I visited my mother she asked me "what happened to all your muscles"? Not realising that the previous time she had seen me I was 10%bf or less and I was now a comfortable and healthy 16%. I had to explain to her that the muscles were still there, she just couldn't see them under the fat! She didn't mean to be rude, but sometimes parents can be so.....blunt. My mom likes to brag to her friends too.

 

[FitFossil]

FitFossil--- I was making more of a general comment...not to anyone in particular. Sorry for any misunderstanding there. I guess I should of rephrased it " glad I know I am getting my moneys worth, when people notice my size". Kudos to you on doing it naturally

ann:

No problem, just wanted to set the record straight

 

[FitFossil]

Thanks everyone, for the "dealing with Mom" encouragement. We have a really good relationship on everything EXCEPT body image. It's always been a sore point between us, and even though I'm a lot tougher now, it still irks me, and probably always will.

 

[smallmovesal]

i asked my mum for a bag of frozen mixed berries from the grocery store (she was taking orders) and when i told her it was for a protein shake she told me i didn't need protein other than at my meal times... she just doesn't get it. oh well. not even after i told her i needed 1g per pound i weigh. then again, she hasn't increased her weights at the gym since i started going with her in feb.

 

[jeangenie]

Wow, i can relate to this as well.

Its so interesting to me that our families still feel that its okay to critique our bodies as adults, and make comments that would get them some major attitude from any non-family types out there.

How frustrating is it to get to a point where we start to feel really great about the results of all those hard hours in the gym, all those damned yams and tuna and myoplex shakes etc. and LOVE how strong we look, only to get these type of comments from family, friends etc. about getting TOO big, TOO 'masculine' (read: upper body definition and mass), TOO cut etc. There is so much fear out there about what women SHOULD be like, how our bodies need to conform to a set of "feminine" ideals etc.

Look at how people rip into Madonna when she gained all that muscle mass from "yoga" (i suspect there may be other influences here as well, but, more power to her) . It just goes to show that a physically powerful woman is still a huge threat to a lot of people out there. Im so happy to be at apoint in my life age-wise (30s) and physique-wise that i see this kind of behavior for what it is (fear and jealousy) and take huge pride in how I look. Self acceptance is a long bumpy road for so many of us: don't let anyone bust your high when you get there!