May day from HELL....

[mdd]

this weekend it dawns on me that i better start my holiday shopping, as time is winding down. being the sly fuck that i am, i figure i'll go on monday during the day while everyone else is at work cuz it wont be as crowded

monday comes alot, and my days starts off. i tell my punk ass little sister not to tie up the phone all day (dialup internet) is i have a few fire depts that may be trying to call about employment

i begin driving to the mall, expecting my normal 10 minute commute, but somehow it takes a friggin hour with all the traffic

i park, go in and am like what the fuck, dont u people have jobs. THOUSANDS OF ThEM

to sum things up:

-its hot as fuck in there
-my lower back is getting a pump from walking around aimlessly
-i'm sweating
-kids crying
-people walking slow infront of you
-people stopping in front of you while your walking
-not being able to find what ppl want
-stores are out of what they do want
-sales people arent helpfull
-i have to go into victoria secret and look like a idiot while i look for some dumbass shower shit with salt in it
-no hot girls were working in victoria secret
-try calling girl who wants this VS shit to ask what it is, no answer
- leave girl Voicemail to call me back so i can get it
-girl never calls back
-traffic was worse when i left
-the line at bestbuy was about 200 yards long. I HAD ONE CD
-took me 45 mins to get home from bestbuy (usaully 15)
-come home, 5 hours later, stupid ass sister left the internet on all day (this pissed me off the most)
-she did other shit that pissed me off
-too bad shes not a brother and a few yrs older so i could beat her face in


and my days only half over. MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMASS ELITE

 

[Ganryu]

I know, it sucks. I hate Christmas. I love getting together with my family, but I hate the shopping. I think I am going to celebrate Festivus next year!

 

[Seashell]

You forgot the maroons that stop at the very bottom or top of the escalator, and stand there trying to decide which way to go while everyone else piles up on their heels. GRR! Move first, THEN decide! It doesn't stop moving, just because you got off.

 

[Ganryu]

You forgot the maroons that stop at the very bottom or top of the escalator, and stand there trying to decide which way to go while everyone else piles up on their heels. GRR! Move first, THEN decide! It doesn't stop moving, just because you got off.

Not just escalators, EVERYWHERE! People stop in the middle of a mall and start looking up and around, like they have NO IDEA what is happeining around them. I don't mess around at the mall though. My all time record for Christams shopping is 1 hour in a mall buying 13 gifts. Not all at the same store either. You have to:
1. Go in with a list.
2. Have the speed and elusiveness of Barry Sanders.
3. If there isn't a hole in the crowd for you to get through, make one somewhat gently (or not so much) and say "Excuse me."

 

[Ganryu]

BTW Seashell...Nice use of the word maroon. Reminded me of Bugs Bunny and made me smile. Thanks. I'll have to hit you tomorrow, I'm out of K.

 

[Seashell]

Not just escalators, EVERYWHERE! People stop in the middle of a mall and start looking up and around, like they have NO IDEA what is happeining around them. I don't mess around at the mall though. My all time record for Christams shopping is 1 hour in a mall buying 13 gifts. Not all at the same store either. You have to:
1. Go in with a list.
2. Have the speed and elusiveness of Barry Sanders.
3. If there isn't a hole in the crowd for you to get through, make one somewhat gently (or not so much) and say "Excuse me."

They should rent cattle-prods by the hour at the mall entrance. Perfect for these people.

 

[Ganryu]

They should rent cattle-prods by the hour at the mall entrance. Perfect for these people.

Good idea. Just give them to the Rent-A-Cops. "Please keep moving" ZAP! "Move along now" ZAP!

 

[Smurfy]

i experienced all these things you speak of yesterday while at the mall. i was only there for maybe an hour or so but enough aggravation for a lifetime. some teenage girl in front of me getting on the escalator while answering her cell phone..oh did i say getting on the escalator? no i mean sticking her foot out but too afraid to take a step and get on thereby leaving me to bump into her resulting in her being pushed onto the escalator by myself followed by her dropping the cell phone. dumbass. bonus was that i saw a hottie in abercrombie and fitch with no shirt on. i guess he was modeling the clothes? who cares what his job was, it made my mall experience somewhat tolerable.

 

[Ganryu]

Or just do your shopping the easy way: "A donation has been made in your name to The Human Fund."

 

[canadianhitman]

I feel your pain....

 

[Raina]

Well I hope your evening improves, you get a call soon about a job, and that you get your shopping done. Sending you positive energy and well-wishes. Little sisters are brats!!!

 

[PIGEON-RAT]

i just ordered shit off the internet. i'm done.

 

[Fragadelic]

i experienced all these things you speak of yesterday while at the mall. i was only there for maybe an hour or so but enough aggravation for a lifetime. some teenage girl in front of me getting on the escalator while answering her cell phone..oh did i say getting on the escalator? no i mean sticking her foot out but too afraid to take a step and get on thereby leaving me to bump into her resulting in her being pushed onto the escalator by myself followed by her dropping the cell phone. dumbass. bonus was that i saw a hottie in abercrombie and fitch with no shirt on. i guess he was modeling the clothes? who cares what his job was, it made my mall experience somewhat tolerable.

LOL Smurfy - Orland Square? You like how goofed up they get John Humphrey Drive with their cones and whistles? Every year gets worse - Orland cops should stick to giving meaningless moving violations

 

[BO-DEN]

hope all improves

 

[Smurfy]

LOL Smurfy - Orland Square? You like how goofed up they get John Humphrey Drive with their cones and whistles? Every year gets worse - Orland cops should stick to giving meaningless moving violations

exactly. thank god i wasnt driving or i would have hit someone.

 

[Scotsman]

They should rent cattle-prods by the hour at the mall entrance. Perfect for these people.

You just became my favorite person of all time. I think the same thing every year and one day I shall carry said cattleprod and use it indiscriminantly. Also your use of the word maroon was cool as hell green K to you.

CHeers,
Scotsman

 

[hardrock]

Or just do your shopping the easy way: "A donation has been made in your name to The Human Fund."

LOL. CHeap ass George.

 

[TC2]

You forgot the maroons that stop at the very bottom or top of the escalator, and stand there trying to decide which way to go while everyone else piles up on their heels. GRR! Move first, THEN decide! It doesn't stop moving, just because you got off.

People generally don't like going shoping with me because I'll push dumbfucks like that outta the way.

I have little tolerance for stupidity.

 

[Seashell]

... one day I shall carry said cattleprod and use it indiscriminantly.

LOL! Please take me with you when you do. We would quite likely end up getting arrested but it'd be worth it.

 

[biteme]

Christmas would be alright if it weren't so commercialized.

 

[Scotsman]

LOL! Please take me with you when you do. We would quite likely end up getting arrested but it'd be worth it.

You got it. What fun is life if you don't get arrested at least once for fighting the just fight.

Cheers,
Scotman