Ladies, Your Input Is Needed

[FreeballinDC]

Here's the scenerio.

You are at a bar, hanging out with some friends. You are not provocatively dressed, although the bar has a reputation for being a meat market.

You get up and head to the powder room. On your way, a guy that you don't know and is of average looks, comes from behind and grabs your ass.

What do you do?

I had a discussion about this in group therapy, but will wait until I get some responses before I post up what the consensus of the group was.

If you need more info concerning the scenario, let me know.

 

[jerkbox]

one time i was with my gf at the time, some guy brushed by her and grabbed her ass, she turned around and gave him a swift kick, right up the ass crack....haha

 

[Y_lifter]

I just hope I don't get Sued..

 

[Seashell]

Hmm.. if you're in a meat-market type of place, I think that kind of thing is likely to happen, regardless of your outfit. Which is not to say it's right or okay.

Personally, if it's not TOO much of a grab, I don't get all uptight about it. If it's just kind of an open palm while you're squeezing through the crowd, I wouldn't be that annoyed, but if it was a two-handful type of grab, that's getting obnoxious. LOL The problem is, it's always a sneaky-grab, so you turn around, and there's 5 guys standing there all looking in the opposite direction... How to know who's toe to stomp? I usually just give the evil eyeball at the whole group and move along.

Though, I did smack some guy's arm when he reached out RIGHT infront of me to grab my cousins booty.

 

[Y_lifter]

Would there be a different reaction ladies to a Boob grab
vs a Butt grab ?

 

[Seashell]

Yep, BIG difference in my opinion. A boob-grab will get you a right hook every time.

 

[FreeballinDC]

Would there be a different reaction ladies to a Boob grab
vs a Butt grab ?

For the purposes of this thread, I'd like to keep it strictly as a butt grab, but good call on the boob grab. That didn't cross my mind.

I would assume that any guy "brave" enough to do a boob grab has already had too many shots of "courage".

 

[Lumberg]

I think it's very low class to grab a girl's butt. I have never done it unless I was going out with a girl.

I remember hanging out with some hoodlums in HS and they were talking about this party that was really packed and wild and how it was just an ass-grabber's dream. I was like, wow, that's low class.

 

[Y_lifter]

Subways in Japan now have women only cars because of this..

 

[Smurfy]

I have non chalantly had my ass grabbed in the bar where i work as a waitress. I normally would tell the guy "hey!" and make him apologize. One time i was standing at the front door with my boyfriend who is the bouncer (6'4" and 300 lbs) and i didnt say anything to the guy who touched my ass b/c i didnt want a fight to ensue.

 

[Smurfy]

Subways in Japan now have women only cars because of this..

well I'm bigger than any Japanese male so i myself wouldnt worry about them trying to touch my ass LOL

 

[Lumberg]

Subways in Japan now have women only cars because of this..

LMAO! I was in Japan when they instituted this!

Schoolgirls in particular are victims of this. There are guys who particularly like to j.o. on chicks with raincoats on. SOmething about the slippery feel of the rubber.

 

[lucidblue]

I think it's very low class to grab a girl's butt. I have never done it unless I was going out with a girl.

I remember hanging out with some hoodlums in HS and they were talking about this party that was really packed and wild and how it was just an ass-grabber's dream. I was like, wow, that's low class.

I agree... it's low class and it pisses me off. I don't care what kind of bar I'm in, there is no reason for some random guy to just grab my ass and think it's okay.

 

[from zero]

I think it's very low class to grab a girl's butt. I have never done it unless I was going out with a girl.

I agree 100%. If I ever see someone do it to a strange girl, I might deck him right there. Totally obnoxious.

 

[FreeballinDC]

OK, now for the twist.

This actually happened to me at a bar one night. I was coming out of the bathroom, and this guy grabs my ass.

I see the culprit out of the corner of my eye, and I grab his arm. I then tell him it would be best if he didn't do it again.

He gets apologetic, and satisfied with his grovelling, I let him go and rejoin my buds.

I tell this same story to my therapy group, and they basically said "what are you worried about?", and that I was making too big a deal out of it.

Yes, it was a gay bar, and that happens all the time, but I don't want it happening to me. I was amazed that the group thought it was OK for him to grab my ass.

 

[Smurfy]

The group probablu thought the dynamics were different in your situation simply because you are a man and not a woman. Men do not tend to be thought of as victims in any situation; at least not as much as women.

 

[TC2]

I agree 100%. If I ever see someone do it to a strange girl, I might deck him right there. Totally obnoxious.

I've thrown a couple of beatins towards some asscocks that thought they could get away with that shit.

I dispise people that think they can do whatever they want with no reprecusions.

 

[FreeballinDC]

The group probablu thought the dynamics were different in your situation simply because you are a man and not a woman. Men do not tend to be thought of as victims in any situation; at least not as much as women.

So basically, it's a double standard.

I still don't get it. If I don't want to be touched, by God, I will NOT be touched.

 

[jerkbox]

So basically, it's a double standard.

I still don't get it. If I don't want to be touched, by God, I will NOT be touched.

hey....your body, your right. why should you tolerate someone touching you if you don't want it. fuck em.

 

[Seashell]

Whoa! I'm surprised your group thought you were making too big a deal out of it. Yes, it happens a lot in the clubs, but that doesn't mean it's okay.

I wonder if they'd have felt differently if you told them some guy grabbed a female friend's butt? Probably.

 

[the nature boy]

FBDC, simply ask From Zero to wait until you two get home when he starts getting grabby with you.

 

[Dial_tone]

I've grabbed the ass of girls I knew, but hadn't come to the club with that night. I would never grab some stranger's ass, although I wouldn't be opposed to a lil unintended boob brush against action.

 

[FreeballinDC]

hey....your body, your right. why should you tolerate someone touching you if you don't want it. fuck em.

I tried that argument, and they still didn't get it. To them, since I was in the bar, it automatically reduced any right I had to lay claim upon myself.

I'm still floored by their responses.

One even said to take it as a compliment.

What ever happened to just saying "Damn, you look good", instead of playing "grope for ass"?

 

[the nature boy]

What ever happened to just saying "Damn, you look good", instead of playing "grope for ass"?

because you're dealing w/guys. guys are for the most part dumb pigs.

 

[bluepeter]

Just wrong. Nobody has a right to touch you in any way without your consent regardless of the situation. I was in a bar a few years ago with my wife and some guy grabbed her ass. I decked him on the spot and broke his nose. Blood all over the place. I found out later he wanted to sue me but I was a regular at the place and knew everyone quite well. Nobody would tell him who I was...

 

[FreeballinDC]

because you're dealing w/guys. guys are for the most part dumb pigs.

Sad, but true

Hell, for all I know, this guy would have been cool to talk to had he made his approach the right way, instead of being a dick, and ruining it for himself.

 

[from zero]

FBDC, simply ask From Zero to wait until you two get home when he starts getting grabby with you.

lol

 

[FreeballinDC]

FBDC, simply ask From Zero to wait until you two get home when he starts getting grabby with you.

I know. His public displays of affection are way out of line.

The guy obviously has attention issues, I'll talk to his Doc about upping his med doses.

 

[vixenbabe]

I was in Italy years ago and got several grabs on to the ass! I thought all the men were rude and bold as hell! Little did I know...

I later learned it was customary for all the men to pinch you if they find you attractive! If you come home without a single brusie, you had better hit the squat rack harder! ;-)

Guess when you're in Rome, do as the Roman's--- But, most American men are not as brave to try such a thing-IMO! Stare and whistle? Yes! Grab? Not likely !

 

[Taps]

lol @ vixenbabe

Back in college, some friends had an exchange student from Italy stay with them for a semester. After a few close calls with angry boyfriends we explained to him that grabbing a stange girls ass isn't the way we introduce ourselves over here. He thought we were all weird. lol

 

[Lumberg]

OK, now for the twist.

This actually happened to me at a bar one night. I was coming out of the bathroom, and this guy grabs my ass.

I see the culprit out of the corner of my eye, and I grab his arm. I then tell him it would be best if he didn't do it again.

He gets apologetic, and satisfied with his grovelling, I let him go and rejoin my buds.

I tell this same story to my therapy group, and they basically said "what are you worried about?", and that I was making too big a deal out of it.

Yes, it was a gay bar, and that happens all the time, but I don't want it happening to me. I was amazed that the group thought it was OK for him to grab my ass.

I say you had every right to break his fuckin' arm.

 

[Bullit]

Yes, it was a gay bar, and that happens all the time, but I don't want it happening to me. I was amazed that the group thought it was OK for him to grab my ass.

Stop being such a poof.

 

[Sebby]

But FreeballinDC, is it okay if I grab your ass still?

 

[superqt4u2nv]

Most of the time it is so crowed it is hard to tell who the ass graber was. If I do know who it was I will shot them a dirty look. If I knew who it was and I know the bouncers I will tell them.

I had an old gf that went ape shit on a guy but he was very dirty about not an average grab. He went up he skirt and grabed her ass.
I had some drunk ass try to poke my boobs in one of my clubbing shirts. I really like the shirt but I rarely wear it now.

 

[Lumberg]

Most of the time it is so crowed it is hard to tell who the ass graber was. If I do know who it was I will shot them a dirty look.

Whoa.....I bet he was sorry!

 

[superqt4u2nv]

Whoa.....I bet he was sorry!

What am I going to do slap him? Things get out of control very fast that way. I find it best to tell a bouncer depends if I know the bouncer or not how effective it is but really what am I suppose to do about it?

 

[boscoe wilson]

As a female, I would probably feed him an elbow.

 

[eviction]

nature boy, that is quite an impressive mullet you have there

 

[tuc biscuit]

I pat ass more than grab it, but only if the girl is obviously out for a good time, no ass patting for stony faced females, and also I do think I can do whatever I want with no consequences.

 

[boscoe wilson]

I pat ass more than grab it, but only if the girl is obviously out for a good time, no ass patting for stony faced females, and also I do think I can do whatever I want with no consequences.

Thats a quick way to get an ass-kickin.

 

[tuc biscuit]

Thats a quick way to get an ass-kickin.

In all honesty at my size I needn't worry about that, also after that comment, no ass patting for you.

 

[boscoe wilson]

Don't worry I'm a stoney face.

 

[superqt4u2nv]

So cause I smile when I go out and am having fun that meams automatic ass grab Tuc?

 

[gtrcivic]

well if you are at a meat market bar, then expect such things to happen.. if you can't handle/deal with it, then go to a less aggressive bar....

happens to me on occasions. i just turn around and say hey that hurt, you didn't have to squeeze it so hard.. or stop and say i didn't know this was the way to meet people nowadays in a friendly manner..

 

[tuc biscuit]

So cause I smile when I go out and am having fun that meams automatic ass grab Tuc?

no, not necassarily automatic, you wish you were that lucky, I get women all over my arms/ass all the time and I don't piss and moan about it, just relax and don't let it bother you

 

[Gymgurl]

I agree... it's low class and it pisses me off. I don't care what kind of bar I'm in, there is no reason for some random guy to just grab my ass and thinks it's okay.

This is my exact thoughts......

 

[Raina]

It happens to me all the time....even if I'm hugged up on my bf while he orders drinks at the bar. It depends on my mood. Sometimes it'll piss me off and I'll start chewing out whoever did it. Other times it'll give me horrible anxiety and I'll want to leave. Mostly it just pisses me off because nobody has a right to touch me unless they're someone I know and trust.

 

[Lumberg]

What am I going to do slap him? Things get out of control very fast that way. I find it best to tell a bouncer depends if I know the bouncer or not how effective it is but really what am I suppose to do about it?

No I can just visualize the guys standing there sniggering...I think a drink over the head would be better. Classic chick move.

Ultimately grabbing their arm and fucking breaking it would be best. Need to develop those cat-like reflexes babe!

Also Raina...what kind of fucking bars do you go to? If I were you, or your bf and knew what was going on, I would be finding a new bar to go to post-haste!