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Here's something I found on the net. A little humor to ease your day!.....
Lighten Up!
Bring a Little Humor to Your Workout
The cabin fever from winter added to continuing bad weather has created a little tension in exercisers lately. To diffuse the tension, why not have a little fun? Here are some ideas to make your gym experience a little more interesting.
--Walk around the the gym holding a mini recorder. Stand behind someone who is lifting weights and say softly into the recorder, "Subject appears to be lifting heavy, metal objects repeatedly. Reason: Unknown." Click off the recorder and hurry away in fear.
--Draw a picture of a stick figure and tape it to the console of your treadmill. Periodically increase your speed and say loudly to the stick man, "Quit that! I don't wanna go faster!"
--Join a spinning class. Halfway through, act like you're speeding uncontrollably down a hill. Crash into an imaginary tree and jump up, shouting, "I'm okay! Nothing to see here, just keep moving!"
--Wrap a towel around your head and go into the aerobics room in the middle of class. Walk over to the mirror and start tweezing your eyebrows. When everyone stops and stares, blink and say, "Isn't this the locker room?"
--In between sets, press your palms together and sing-song, "We must, we must, we must increase our bust."
--Stop at Burger King on the way to the gym. Sit cross-legged on a weight bench and eat french fries while scoring people on the size of their muscles as they walk by. (i.e., "Now THAT IS an impressive bicep! 10!"
--Sneak past the front desk guy and use the microphone to say, "Attention members! Will the guy on treadmill number 9 please report to the front desk before you put someone's eye out."
--Join an aerobics class. After the warm up walk to the front of the room and start teaching the Hokey Pokey.
--Accidentally get tangled up in the cable machine. Scream hysterically, "It's ALIVE!"
--Drop a dumbbell on the floor. When someone hands it back to you, clap your hands over your ears and run out the door, screaming hysterically.
--Stand in the free weight section and repeatedly salute to yourself in the mirror. When people stare, say, "it's for building bigger biceps." Come back the next day to see how many people are saluting to themselves for bigger arms.
Light a cigarette while riding a stationary bike. Offer one to your neighbor and say, "you know, I really should quit this nasty habit."
--Approach an employee and ask them how much it would cost to add a dog to your membership.
--Walk up to the supplement counter eating a cheeseburger and slap your hand down, saying sharply, "I need to gain a LOT of weight really fast. Got a pill for that?" When the person looks at you strangely, say, "What? It's for my wedding."
Don't worry, warm weather will be back soon and we can all revert back to the normal, calm creatures we were before winter madness set in. Have fun and keep working out!
Lighten Up!
Bring a Little Humor to Your Workout
The cabin fever from winter added to continuing bad weather has created a little tension in exercisers lately. To diffuse the tension, why not have a little fun? Here are some ideas to make your gym experience a little more interesting.
--Walk around the the gym holding a mini recorder. Stand behind someone who is lifting weights and say softly into the recorder, "Subject appears to be lifting heavy, metal objects repeatedly. Reason: Unknown." Click off the recorder and hurry away in fear.
--Draw a picture of a stick figure and tape it to the console of your treadmill. Periodically increase your speed and say loudly to the stick man, "Quit that! I don't wanna go faster!"
--Join a spinning class. Halfway through, act like you're speeding uncontrollably down a hill. Crash into an imaginary tree and jump up, shouting, "I'm okay! Nothing to see here, just keep moving!"
--Wrap a towel around your head and go into the aerobics room in the middle of class. Walk over to the mirror and start tweezing your eyebrows. When everyone stops and stares, blink and say, "Isn't this the locker room?"
--In between sets, press your palms together and sing-song, "We must, we must, we must increase our bust."
--Stop at Burger King on the way to the gym. Sit cross-legged on a weight bench and eat french fries while scoring people on the size of their muscles as they walk by. (i.e., "Now THAT IS an impressive bicep! 10!"
--Sneak past the front desk guy and use the microphone to say, "Attention members! Will the guy on treadmill number 9 please report to the front desk before you put someone's eye out."
--Join an aerobics class. After the warm up walk to the front of the room and start teaching the Hokey Pokey.
--Accidentally get tangled up in the cable machine. Scream hysterically, "It's ALIVE!"
--Drop a dumbbell on the floor. When someone hands it back to you, clap your hands over your ears and run out the door, screaming hysterically.
--Stand in the free weight section and repeatedly salute to yourself in the mirror. When people stare, say, "it's for building bigger biceps." Come back the next day to see how many people are saluting to themselves for bigger arms.
Light a cigarette while riding a stationary bike. Offer one to your neighbor and say, "you know, I really should quit this nasty habit."
--Approach an employee and ask them how much it would cost to add a dog to your membership.
--Walk up to the supplement counter eating a cheeseburger and slap your hand down, saying sharply, "I need to gain a LOT of weight really fast. Got a pill for that?" When the person looks at you strangely, say, "What? It's for my wedding."
Don't worry, warm weather will be back soon and we can all revert back to the normal, calm creatures we were before winter madness set in. Have fun and keep working out!
