Is there a differnce between finding someone attractive, and being attracted to them?

[Taps]

I told a female friend of mine today that I thought she was hot, and she got freaked out 'cause she thought I was making a move or something. I tried to explain that just 'cause I thought she was attractive, I didn't want to nail/date/marry her. She didn't get it, and now thinks I'm a freak.

I know plenty of hot chicks who I'm not attracted to for whatever reason. Am I weird? I mean, it's not a sexual thing, 'cause I generally want to fuck every half-attractive girl I see...but that doesn't necesarliy mean I'd try. Or that I'd even want to try. Does this make sense?

Just curious what everyone thinks about this.

 

[Trance]

I think that it's common to find someone attractive without being attracted to them. I think a lot of men at clubs are attractive, but I'm definitely not attracted to them at all, since a lot of them dress badly and act like idiots... I also think you can be attracted to someone that you normally wouldn't find attractive. It's rare, but it happens.

 

[MommaKin]

Trance, you said that very well.
You don't have to be attracted to someone you find attractive.....but, if I am attracted to someone, it does mean I find them attractive also.
Also, like Trance said, sometimes you might be attracted to someone you wouldn't normally be attracted to.

 

[smallmovesal]

those sentences read like a jigsaw puzzle lol

yeah taps doesn't want to nail me but i'm freaking hot

 

[Stryc-9]

You mean to say that she's actually pissed off at you?!? Holy crap some people need to learn how to take a compliment. At least you didn't call her ugly...if she freaks out when you call her attractive - how the hell would she react if you insulted her?

Personally, I see nothing wrong with your behavior....not a thing....unless you raised the issue at an inappropriate time - like she's telling you that her father died or something and you reply by telling her she's a hottie.....but outside of a circumstance like that - I can't believe she was upset....

You ought to tell her that, on considering the matter, her response has made her unattractive afterall....

 

[danielson]

yeah....there are people that i know that i find attractive physically but im not attracted to them


ive never told them unless they needed the ego-pop and that situations only arisen once, because i know that some people will for some crazy reason act like the chick taps is chatting about, why they do this ill never know

 

[saint808]

how bad did she really freak... i find lots of people attractive but then they open their mouth and it ruins it....

 

[smallmovesal]

how bad did she really freak... i find lots of people attractive but then they open their mouth and it ruins it....

doh!

 

[Trance]

It''s pretty egotistical to assume that if someone thinks you're attractive, that means they want to fuck your brains out.

But then again, that's what a lot of people mean...

I grew up with a guy who was drop-dead gorgeous - just absolutely fine as hell, but he had the snottiest little bitchy attitude - it just completely put me off. I don't care how good-looking someone is - "Ain't no cure for an ugly soul"!

When I first met my fiancee, I didn't find him attractive at all. Totally not my type. But as I grew to love him, I came to see him for the hot little sexmachine he is. LOL

 

[saint808]

doh!

i wasn't talking about you smalls... really i wasn't... i find you more attractive when you pen your mouth... you have nice teeth.

 

[Taps]

She didn't freak bad or anything. She just assumes I have feelings for her now, which I don't. I was really just paying her a compliment....although I wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers.

Seriously though, she's really hot, but I don't have any interest in her beyond friendship. Weird, I know.

Part of the situation is my fault. I'm a evil flirt and most women who know me are generally nervous in my presence. I like to keep 'em on thier toes. Anyway, that works against me a lot of the time, as most girls assume that by paying them a complimet, I just want to get in thier pants. They never know if they should take me seriously.

 

[Taps]

i wasn't talking about you smalls... really i wasn't... i find you more attractive when you pen your mouth... you have nice teeth.

You've obviously never heard her sing.

 

[saint808]

You've obviously never heard her sing.

*note to self... buy ball gag or ear plugs if meeting smalls

 

[toga22]

I'm a evil flirt and most women who know me are generally nervous in my presence. I like to keep 'em on thier toes.

.....Really, I would have never guessed that!!

LOL, I think it is very normal to be attracted to someone's appearance without "wanting" them physically.

Kind of like the difference between "loving someone" and "being in love" with someone.

Take Care Taps!!

~toga

 

[smallmovesal]

i sing like a bird and taps you know i don't shake in the presence of men

 

[saint808]

i sing like a bird and taps you know i don't shake in the presence of men

what kind of bird... that could be very misleading... because a swallow would be pretty and a crow could be very annoying.

 

[smallmovesal]

a good sounding bird... not like a blue jay or a crow

 

[HumorMe]

....although I wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers.

I would because there is more room on the floor!

 

[OMEGA]

Usually when I tell a girl that is a freind...that she is hot, I get this crazy good look right back right away. (good crazy)

or they end up liking me or something.


So I kind of reserve those comments now.


either way when you tell a freind that she is hot, you let her know that her buety is appreciated by someone.


there are far too many beutiful women out there who go around under appreciated, and un loved......then they end up settling down with either

A) jerks

or

B) ugly dudes.


Bueaty should be appreciated for what it is.......and thats Bueaty.

and I am never afraid to point that out

 

[Austin316]

yep, quite a few girls I find attractive, but not attracted enough to date them, kinda wierd, but just don't feel that something