I Only killed X People

[javaguru]

I was in desert storm, and I have "issues."
I went to my father, a WWII vet to discuss them.
His response, " You only killed X people what is your problem, I killed Y people, raised a family of three and put your ass through law school."

BTW, I 'm drunk as hell.

 

[ajtomasi]

X and Y. I'm not understanding. Please continue.

 

[DBCooper]

If you really are concerned seek help, but remember what you did was your job-you were in war-that's what happens so there is nothing you did that was wreng. It was either you or them that would get to see their family later.

 

[Big Johnson]

Do you look at your fellow soldiers now like they are murderers?

Soldiers don't make the front page when we send them off to fight for us and they get killed doing it. Soldiers don't get a trial, and there never will be a pill they can take or an operation that can be performed to save them once they've fallen. What price can you place on life when only God can grant it?

Dispite this, you learned to be a soldier and did your duty. Wasn't that more than enough? What else should be asked of you?

I can't believe you're actually going to try and feel responsible for doing what we swore you to do, when you and I both know you did what was expected; your duty.

You, my friend, have nothing to be ashamed of.

You were called, and you answered that call, just as you said you would. You gave up the ideaology that so many enjoy in exchange for the wisdom of life, and you showed up for the lesson.

I wish I had more friends like you, bro; guys who I could count on when the shit gets deep to pull the trigger. Guys who try and take the fall or carry the blame for things I didn't have to do because they came through.

Your duty now is to live your life without feeling bad you served us all so well.

 

[NoDaddyNo]

plus they were all dirty foreigners whom God hates

 

[TexasPower]

Well said Big J.

 

[argent]

Yse very well said BJ. "Thank You" to all of the soldiers out there.

 

[Generic MALE]

I, like a great many guys on here I am sure, have friends who killed people in combat. My dad killed a great many in bombing runs as well as killing some close quarters by cutting their throats etc. For most of the guys it was business as usual. I have one Viet nam vet who got into "vandettas" with the enemy - the Viet Cong would kill an American and then mess up his body in weird ways (I won't go into it here) and leave the body for his American soldiers to find just to upset them. So he and his friends when they killed a Viet Cong would return the favor - do some kind of twisted things to the dead body - and leave it where the Viet Cong would find it.

War can be fucked up. A bunch of pencil necks in Washington start the things, then young guys who are mechanics, farmers, students etc have to finish it for them. Everyone I know who has killed a man in combat and been close enough to watch and hear them die was changed by it. Especially since most of the time you really have nothing against the guy, if it was not for the war you would not really want to kill him.

I don't have anything to offer you other than what others here have, except my personal sympathy - sympathy often is more needed by the living than for the dead. Maybe it helps to know there are lots of guys in the world who have gone through the same thing - and despite years of bad dreams, remembering what happened and the people it affected-still are able to get through it and live meaningful lives. I hope you are able to get through this sooner rather than later.

 

[DcupSheepNipples]

I was in desert storm, and I have "issues."
I went to my father, a WWII vet to discuss them.
His response, " You only killed X people what is your problem, I killed Y people, raised a family of three and put your ass through law school."

BTW, I 'm drunk as hell.

That may be true but you sure as hell but you did not kill your enemy face to face in a co op and did not have any collateral damage of innocent civilians within arms reach! When you are ordered to kill the enemy and instead you kill the inocent becuase of a intel f-up and you witness their last breath then you have an excuse to drink! Otherwise move on!

 

[DepressiveJuice]

i wish i could have been in WWII or vietnam vet. experiencing those types of war must be interesting

 

[javaguru]

OK, I took a couple days and went to the UP, and camped out for a couple days wity my dog. At first I thought my father's staement was callous but as I thought about it I know he was pretty much telling me to "get over myself." He and his war buddies, which he rode bikes with for years after the war, spent years performing reprehensible acts. He still made a good life for my mother and myself. I've just never been able to buy the "doing my duty" rationalization because what makes state sanctioned murder "ok" Vs. any other type. Yes, I understand a good cause which to this day I believe we did the right thing in liberating Kuwait. I'm just too philisophical for my own good apparently. Thanks for the supportive comments and I know where you're coming from, time for me to move on.....