I am under a curse

[evansteve]

It appears that I am under a curse. I have tried talking to many different men and women and all that i have found is that...

Whoever I try to talk to, and befriend, they will not show the same interest in return. Or if anyone is interested in talking to me, I wont be interested in talking to them. This goes for both guys and girls.

Whenever I try talking to a woman or a man, it sounds forced, and it makes me look desperate and like a loser.


You know how most people know when to talk? There's like a vibe that they can feel out and use, and talk to people when they feel that charisma connection. Well, unfortunately with me its rarely like that. I rarely feel a real bond to people, so I have to force conversation.

I've tried the common interest approach, that doesnt work either. People who share my interests still want nothing to do with me.


I'm giving up on people alltogether, they fucking suck. The reason i cant get laid, or get a life, is not because I dont have balls. I have plenty of balls. I try all the time, and people just dont fucking accept me.
Any time that I try, people interpret it as me trying too hard, so the only option is to not try at all, which gets me no where.

Why talk to more women, only to find out that they are not interested, and to make a fool of myself?

 

[H_T_]

relax, and fuck what people think........

 

[Lestat]

you are tryin too hard man. Everyone has told you this.

You can't go into a relationship with an individual goal. you can't TRY to make a connection, you can't TRY to talk about common interests... you just go in, be yourself, and see what happens. Sometimes you wont click, don't let it discourage you.

Some people have 2 good friends, some people have 200... everyone is different man, again, don't get discouraged, just live your life and do what you need to do in order to be happy.

 

[evansteve]

you are tryin too hard man. Everyone has told you this.

You can't go into a relationship with an individual goal. you can't TRY to make a connection, you can't TRY to talk about common interests... you just go in, be yourself, and see what happens. Sometimes you wont click, don't let it discourage you.

Some people have 2 good friends, some people have 200... everyone is different man, again, don't get discouraged, just live your life and do what you need to do in order to be happy.

Look, the problem is that I just dont 'click' with anybody. And I've tried alot of people. I'm like a man out on an island. I have no real friends at this college that I go to. In the summer time when my highschool buds come back home I have friends, but during the school year Im lonely as fuck.

And remember, for me, any time that I try at all, its interpretted as trying too hard. Even if I just say hello.

 

[H_T_]

dude, jus relax, you'll be fine, some people jus have a hard time socially; don't measure success by the amount of friends you have, most people would be lucky to have just one great friend.

 

[hamstershaver]

do you use deodorant and brush your teeth every day?

 

[evansteve]

do you use deodorant and brush your teeth every day?

aww fuck...

 

[evansteve]

do you use deodorant and brush your teeth every day?

no wait a minute, even when I did, people still didnt care for me.

 

[H_T_]

call those queer eye guys..........

 

[Lestat]

Look, the problem is that I just dont 'click' with anybody. And I've tried alot of people. I'm like a man out on an island. I have no real friends at this college that I go to. In the summer time when my highschool buds come back home I have friends, but during the school year Im lonely as fuck.

And remember, for me, any time that I try at all, its interpretted as trying too hard. Even if I just say hello.

believe me, there are other people out there just like you that I am sure you would click with fine.. a "hello" CAN be trying to hard.. if you are TRYING.. if you are just saying it casually then its fine, but I suspect that you over analyze and calculate almost every piece of social interaction you have now.

Join a club or play some sports that put you in situations to bond with people...

 

[Gambino]

you're on a self-imposed island

 

[hamstershaver]

no wait a minute, even when I did, people still didnt care for me.

in that case there is probably no hope for you, i like you though

 

[-SD-]

I knew it wouldnt take long for this.

 

[H_T_]

maybe you need a gimmick, like a cowboy look or gangsta thug..........

 

[evansteve]

believe me, there are other people out there just like you that I am sure you would click with fine.. a "hello" CAN be trying to hard.. if you are TRYING.. if you are just saying it casually then its fine, but I suspect that you over analyze and calculate almost every piece of social interaction you have now.

Join a club or play some sports that put you in situations to bond with people...

i work at the nerdy computer helpdesk job at my school. wouldnt that be good enough to help me bond with other nerdy helpdesk workers like me?

I try to bond with people in my apartment area, and that doesnt work.

PS: The problem with either joining a sports team or a club here is that, there are none at this school that i could join. I'm not good enough to play sports. For intramurals u need to sign up with a group (something i dont have) and for the clubs, there are very few of them, and all of them are gay crap that im not interested in like debate team, or volunteer to watch kids in an inner city daycare, or shit like that. its a mess.

 

[hamstershaver]

i work at the nerdy computer helpdesk job at my school. wouldnt that be good enough to help me bond with other nerdy helpdesk workers like me?

I try to bond with people in my apartment area, and that doesnt work.

PS: The problem with either joining a sports team or a club here is that, there are none at this school that i could join. I'm not good enough to play sports. For intramurals u need to sign up with a group (something i dont have) and for the clubs, there are very few of them, and all of them are gay crap that im not interested in like debate team, or volunteer to watch kids in an inner city daycare, or shit like that. its a mess.

there has got to be at least one plumper there you can hook up with

 

[biteme]

Well you sent me a pm and talked to me and I sent one back. We share similar beliefs on at least one topic that I know of. lol Forgive me though, I am a recluse and I'm very hard to get to know. I post on the board all the time, but rarely ever IM or pm. I'm just not as comfortable that way. Nothing personal though

 

[Ulcasterdropout]

Damn, bor. There has to be a way...Don't give up.

 

[evansteve]

Well you sent me a pm and talked to me and I sent one back. We share similar beliefs on at least one topic that I know of. lol Forgive me though, I am a recluse and I'm very hard to get to know. I post on the board all the time, but rarely ever IM or pm. I'm just not as comfortable that way. Nothing personal though

dont worry, i dont feel bad about that. I dont expect ppl to PM me on this board constantly, and even if they did I'm not sure how much good it would do.

I need some real friends, ones that live around here, that I can see in front of my face, hang out with, etc.

there has got to be at least one plumper there you can hook up with

Whats the point in hooking up with a woman that you arent attracted to?

 

[jerkbox]

i'm sure it's not as bad as you think.....i used to feel the same way.

unless you truely are completely annoying, i remember this one kid back in college that everyone called whackjob....he was possibly the most annoying person on earth, and incredibly stupid.

 

[evansteve]

i'm sure it's not as bad as you think.....i used to feel the same way.

unless you truely are completely annoying, i remember this one kid back in college that everyone called whackjob....he was possibly the most annoying person on earth, and incredibly stupid.

i dont know, maybe i should just ask people whether or not I'm annoying, and wtf my problem is, and why cant i socialize with ppl.

 

[jackangel]

i remember this one kid back in college that everyone called whackjob....he was possibly the most annoying person on earth, and incredibly stupid.

whackjob ... 8 letters

from zero ... also 8 letters






hmmmm

 

[jenscats5]

Look, the problem is that I just dont 'click' with anybody. And I've tried alot of people. I'm like a man out on an island. I have no real friends at this college that I go to. In the summer time when my highschool buds come back home I have friends, but during the school year Im lonely as fuck.

And remember, for me, any time that I try at all, its interpretted as trying too hard. Even if I just say hello.

OK, let's preface this by saying I'm a woman....

SO, Who the Fuck Cares if you click with Every Single Fucking Person?? No ONEE!!!!! You ARen't supposed To click with everyone!! duhhhhhh.......

Look dude..... Find your own interests, find YOURSELF.... find YOU... KNOW YOURSELF.... FIND WHAT MAKES A MATE TO YOU -- LIKE 5 THINGS & DON'T ACCEPT ANY LESS......... If you don't get that, fine, move on.... Who the hell cares if people like you?? People are shallow, mindless, sheep followers who can't think on their own...............
Do you want to get laid?? Then pretend to be someone some pretty girl wants & after 3 dates, tell her you love her, you'll get in her pants....

Look dude, you try to hard yet give up too easy but expect too much........

 

[evansteve]

OK, let's preface this by saying I'm a woman....

SO, Who the Fuck Cares if you click with Every Single Fucking Person?? No ONEE!!!!! You ARen't supposed To click with everyone!! duhhhhhh.......

Look dude..... Find your own interests, find YOURSELF.... find YOU... KNOW YOURSELF.... FIND WHAT MAKES A MATE TO YOU -- LIKE 5 THINGS & DON'T ACCEPT ANY LESS......... If you don't get that, fine, move on.... Who the hell cares if people like you?? People are shallow, mindless, sheep followers who can't think on their own...............
Do you want to get laid?? Then pretend to be someone some pretty girl wants & after 3 dates, tell her you love her, you'll get in her pants....

u see, its not that i dont click with 'everyone' its that i dont click with 'anyone' Find what makes a mate to me? are u talking as in a friend or a girlfriend? In any case, unfrotunately i dont have that many interests, and there arent too many things that appeal to me. well except for watching movies, writing on forums, and maybe making out with a cute girl if i had the chance.

Look dude, you try to hard yet give up too easy but expect too much........

wow, im not sure how to read that last sentence.

 

[evansteve]

im bored and feeling down right now and antisocial, i think im going to nap my evening away.

 

[-SD-]

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

 

[EnderJE]

i'm sure it's not as bad as you think.....i used to feel the same way.

unless you truely are completely annoying, i remember this one kid back in college that everyone called whackjob....he was possibly the most annoying person on earth, and incredibly stupid.

you fuckin' whackjob...

 

[Allon]

Are you funny?

How did you meet the friends you do have?

 

[SoreArms]

this is terrible, simply terrible

 

[Ganryu]

you fuckin' whackjob...

+1

 

[jenscats5]

u see, its not that i dont click with 'everyone' its that i dont click with 'anyone' Find what makes a mate to me? are u talking as in a friend or a girlfriend? In any case, unfrotunately i dont have that many interests, and there arent too many things that appeal to me. well except for watching movies, writing on forums, and maybe making out with a cute girl if i had the chance.

I understand that..... But by "clicking" with yourself first, you'll eventually be able to click with someone else..... Reading your posts, it just doesn't sound like you know yourself well enough yet.... As for interests -- develop some!! Girls like someone who won't be a leech off them -- it's OK to have separate interests -- discover your own....

wow, im not sure how to read that last sentence.

What I mean is that you try too hard, but if there isn't an instantaneous BAM! click, then you give up, and post here how terrible you are.....

 

[geoboy]

tie a porkchop around your neck, and maybe you can at least make some dog friends.

-

 

[geoboy]

allright allright.

I learned a long time ago that when u make like you don't give a shit (and its even better if you really don't give a shit), suddenly it's alot easier to make friends & get laid. (corrollary: women smell desperation a mile away)

when u get rejected (like everybody occasionally does) don't think "what's wrong with me", think "what's her/his fucking problem".

and you sound like maybe you're clinically depressed and could benefit from some prozac/paxil whch is also now prescribed for social anxiety if I'm not mistaken. can't hurt to try. if you walk around with a hangdog look of a loser no one is gonna want to have anything to do with you.



-

 

[evansteve]

Are you funny?

How did you meet the friends you do have?

the friends that I do have, I met awhile ago. back when I was in highschool and involved in sports and shiz. Yeah, I have a decent sense of humor, which helped. I think in the later years I began to think too much, and also acted kinda needy and all, which would explain the lack of friends ive had recently

 

[evansteve]

What I mean is that you try too hard, but if there isn't an instantaneous BAM! click, then you give up, and post here how terrible you are.....

now Im confused. I try too hard, but I give up too soon?

I know I need to develop some interests to make myself more appealing, but we have one minor problem: Almost nothing interests me.

allright allright.

I learned a long time ago that when u make like you don't give a shit (and its even better if you really don't give a shit), suddenly it's alot easier to make friends & get laid. (corrollary: women smell desperation a mile away)

when u get rejected (like everybody occasionally does) don't think "what's wrong with me", think "what's her/his fucking problem".

and you sound like maybe you're clinically depressed and could benefit from some prozac/paxil whch is also now prescribed for social anxiety if I'm not mistaken. can't hurt to try. if you walk around with a hangdog look of a loser no one is gonna want to have anything to do with you.

yeah, true. desperation is what kills me. But then thats MY problem, and I need to change not, its not THEIR problem.

I am currently taking Prozac. It hasnt really helped with altering my mood, but it has helped me to stop thinking as much (believe it or not)

 

[RADAR]

Rob a bank...you'll find plenty of people to bond with in the pen


RADAR

 

[jenscats5]

Yes, you try too hard, and when you don't get instantaneous results, you give up.

Your lack of interest in anything is a sign of depression. Your ups & downs also sound like bi-polar disorder. Not to sound like a jerk, but I think you need to see a psychiatrist & have an evaluation & have them re-evaluate your meds also.

 

[evansteve]

Yes, you try too hard, and when you don't get instantaneous results, you give up.

Your lack of interest in anything is a sign of depression. Your ups & downs also sound like bi-polar disorder. Not to sound like a jerk, but I think you need to see a psychiatrist & have an evaluation & have them re-evaluate your meds also.

I dont believe in depression. If my lack of interest in anything is a sign of depression, then I will MAKE myself find some interests. I would gladly make myself find some interests before undergoing years worth of therapy, which in the end i'd still have to question whether or not i was sane enough to get a woman.

I can stay up all the time, and I can find some interests, if thats what it takes. Give me some examples of some good interests to find.

 

[jenscats5]

I dont believe in depression. If my lack of interest in anything is a sign of depression, then I will MAKE myself find some interests. I would gladly make myself find some interests before undergoing years worth of therapy, which in the end i'd still have to question whether or not i was sane enough to get a woman.

I can stay up all the time, and I can find some interests, if thats what it takes. Give me some examples of some good interests to find.

I can't tell you what to be interested in. This discussion is circuitous....