Give us Bouncers & doormen a break!!

[scott825]

I work at a bar as a doorman/bouncer I fucking tired of all the attitudes I get from these punk ass fuckers who wanna talk shit to me cause im doing my job.I swear to god before this summers over improbably gonna just fuck one of these assholes up & teach them a lesson.Here are some helpful hints ..

Dress code:We dont make the dresscode management does.We just have to enforce it.Dont expect to get into any decent club/bar with your fucking pants hanging down below your ASS,
Dont wear jump suits & Jerseys unless its he fucking Superbowl or
something!Tie your fucking shoes!leave the fucking bandanas,sweat bands & doo rags at home.Wife beaters-Do I even need to say carry your ass?Dont even wear a sleeveless shirt unless your 6% BF & fucking jacked! Besides why the fuck do you even wanna go out looking like that? Do you think your get laid?

ID's-Unless you know somebody then dont expect to get in without a valid DMV ID or a passport.If your ID is craked,bent up,coming apart or does not look like you did when the picture was taken then carry a backup like a college ID or something else with your picture.If your shit is fake then dont get mad if the doorman takes it away.I dont do that but alot of bouncers get like $20 for each one.

Attitude-If you get a attitude & start cussing at the bouncers then you will definatly not get in.If your in the bar & start shit then dont get your feelingshurt when we use your head to open up the door.

Closing time-whatever that time may be where your at then try not to be those last few assholes who we have to take drinks away from.If you wanna still drink then go to a after hours club for Christs Sakes!Most of us have day jobs & have been awake for long hours & want to go the fuck home & try to get some ass before our girlfriends go to bed or whatever.


I know that there are some bouncers who are complete fucking assholes.But most of us are not.I've been bouncing for about five years now & I've only worked with a few who were like that.we like to go out & get fucked up too.I hope this helps & please remember we are just doing our jobs.

Any other fellow bouncers feel free to add to the list..

L8TR, Scott825

 

[WODIN]

Damn...now you made me miss my days as a bouncer... I am seriously thinking about working a few clubs in philly just for shits and giggles a couple days here and there. LOL!!!!

 

[Peyote Killa]

Wodin, how do you expec to stop some punk kid who outweighs you, not to mention is like 21 which means he is 35 years yunger than you are. Huh, what do you do then?
Good luck bro, you will need it.

Scott, I feel what you are saying, I don't really go out, but when I do I have respect for any security, I have plenty of friends who do the bouncer thing.

 

[havoc]

Good points, but you just have to understand that the negativity you describe is "PART OF THE JOB". The people coming in, well most of them, are already going to have an inferior complex when it comes to bouncers, instead of realizing you are doing your job they replace it with "you are being a dick or trying to be hard,etc". Sounds like you do a good job and know the business. Are there police officers where you bounce? Like at the front door or entrance? If so, you most likely know them very well because they are there when you are. Once I was bouncing at a club in North Carolina, there was these group of kids that would always give security a difficult time, just for kicks. Well about 2 months into the job I asked the cops working at the front if they would mind if I took these kids out back and beat the shit out of them if they came to the club tonight and started acting up, the cops replied "what have you been waiting for", so sure enough, these fools park, strut on up, acting disrespectful, there are 3 of them, I say "I tell you what, I'll let you in for free, no cover, if all 3 of you go to the back with me and attempt to take me down, I said all you have to do is make say "thats enough", being the hard compton wannabees that they were they could not turn down such an offer, I went back there focused and unrelenting, took one out with a punch to the neck, other one trys to jump me from behind, that lasted 2 seconds, threw him on the ground , mule kicked his solarplexes, the other dude said "no thanks", told those fools to get up and leave, they did. So, if you can do something similar to this, then do it, nothing will beat focus and adrenaline, I promise. peace

 

[scott825]

Wodin you should do it bro! It really is alot of fun & most people are not assholes like that.You get hooked up with lots of free shit & meet beutiful women while your getting paid.I have alot of fun most of the time.If I didn't then I would not do it cause I have a regular day job.

 

[WODIN]

Wodin, how do you expec to stop some punk kid who outweighs you, not to mention is like 21 which means he is 35 years yunger than you are. Huh, what do you do then?
Good luck bro, you will need it.
.

6' 3" 278

Current Stats.

Chest 57 "
Neck 20"
Arms 21.5"
Quads 32"
Waist 38"

Come again?

 

[scott825]

Havoc,great story Bro .When I worked at the college bars we use to do shit like that all the time.There are cops that stand in front of the club across the street but & they always comeover if I need them but our bar does not pay them to stand in front of ours.Fuck it if I do have to beat someones ass & get fired for it then I'll just go bounce somewhere else the next night later.

 

[Peyote Killa]

6' 3" 178

Current Stats.

Chest 17 "
Neck 2"
Arms 2.5"
Quads12"
Waist 48"

Come again?

Exactly!


( I'm just joking around big guy, I wouldn't fuck with you unless I was drunk, and I don't drink so I guess I'll never fuck with you)
You scare me!!!!

 

[havoc]

6' 3" 278

Current Stats.

Chest 57 "
Neck 20"
Arms 21.5"
Quads 32"
Waist 38"

Come again?

 

[scott825]

Damn Wodin I forgot how big you were cause it been so long.If you ever come to VA you got a job Bro!

 

[WODIN]

Big deal. The bigger they come, the harder they fall. I fight dirty.. Ya know....kicking and groin stuff. Things like that.

I have cast iron nuts....Had them put in during the crusades! LOL!!!

 

[casavant]

Awesome

Great post man! I couldn't have said it better myself. I've been bouncing, at times six nights a week, for the past two and a half years. I know where you're coming from.

It really irritates me at the end of the night when I'm going around politely asking people to finish up and head towards the door, and I get ignored by a group. Then after about three passes, I finally get irritated and act a little more stern, and they get all indignant.

Also, if the bouncer is using a stool at the door, and he has to get up for some reason, do not take the fucking stool! If I see that happen, I will take it back. It's "my" bar. We have a neat little raised area in the corner where I often sit with a bar stool and have a great veiw of the whole room. Last Saturday, I was walking out of the bathroom just as some little chick was waltzing her happy ass on up there and picking up my chair. She was pretty embarrassed when I caught her red handed.

Another pet peeve of mine: If you know someone at the bar and you're getting to hang out after hours, stay the FUCK out of the way of the staff when they're cleaning up. Get your ass out of your bar stool and let the guy sweep under it. And don't step in my fucking trash pile when I'm sweeping the floor that by that time more closely resembles a stock yard. Throw your own bottles away and be polite.

And finally, if you get a beer mug smashed over your face in a bar fight, try not to bleed everywhere. We had that happen again last weekend. I'm getting really sick of washing the blood off and changing shirts. Yuck.

 

[The Ranger]

If he comes to Va. He's working at my club Scott.....Plus, us older, little fucks got to stick together....heh heh heh

Ranger

 

[manny78]

Great post. Can't remember how many times I had problems with wannabes "Jay-Z". That'S why I was always working with pepper spray, expandable baton and handcuffs. I had no choice, I was working in a big hip-hop club and was the only security there....

 

[WODIN]

Re: Awesome

And finally, if you get a beer mug smashed over your face in a bar fight, try not to bleed everywhere. We had that happen again last weekend. I'm getting really sick of washing the blood off and changing shirts. Yuck.

Oh shit...flashback.. I had a kid one night who took an elbow from me to his nose. Pure accident, you know one of the guys who craine in for a closer look at the guy on the floor. I was picking ths guy up and wacked the kid in the nose with an elbow. He bleed for 20 minutes! I must of stuffed 500 little bar napkins in his face. LOL!!!

 

[casavant]

Re: Re: Awesome

Oh shit...flashback.. I had a kid one night who took an elbow from me to his nose. Pure accident, you know one of the guys who craine in for a closer look at the guy on the floor. I was picking ths guy up and wacked the kid in the nose with an elbow. He bleed for 20 minutes! I must of stuffed 500 little bar napkins in his face. LOL!!!

I hear ya. Man, this fucker got a grande sized beer mug broken on his face in an argument over who was first at the urinal. It cut him right above his eye and by the time we got back there his face was a red mask and his shirt was glistening. I used to have more adrenaline in a situation like that and just jump right in, but now I just try to find a dry spot on their shirt that I can grab. I still got blood on my forearms and shirt though, and we had to bleach out the bathroom. It looked like someone had decapitated a chicken in there.

 

[WODIN]

Forehead cuts are the worst for bleeding a lot and not being threatening. That's why pro wrestlers are always doing the small slit cuts for show.

 

[manny78]

Re: Re: Re: Awesome

I hear ya. Man, this fucker got a grande sized beer mug broken on his face in an argument over who was first at the urinal. It cut him right above his eye and by the time we got back there his face was a red mask and his shirt was glistening. I used to have more adrenaline in a situation like that and just jump right in, but now I just try to find a dry spot on their shirt that I can grab. I still got blood on my forearms and shirt though, and we had to bleach out the bathroom. It looked like someone had decapitated a chicken in there.

Just use security gloves made in Kevlar. Thats what I used to do before. Plus you can grab someone's knife with these gloves without cutting your hand/fingers.

 

[casavant]

Forehead cuts are the worst for bleeding a lot and not being threatening. That's why pro wrestlers are always doing the small slit cuts for show.

That's for sure. Fountains of blood, I tell ya!! We had a 37-stitcher a couple of months ago. Lots of blood there, too.

 

[Warik]

Wodin, how do you expec to stop some punk kid who outweighs you, not to mention is like 21 which means he is 35 years yunger than you are. Huh, what do you do then?
Good luck bro, you will need it.

Hehe... WODIN would tear the place apart. That fart would use his cane if he had to. No one gets the better of WODIN.

-Warik

 

[Robert Jan]

what kind of things are required to be a bouncer? It sounds like a job id like to work while in uni.

i suppose you just need to be real big and be able to handle a situation... I`m 189.5 lbs now about 15% bf... but im only 16 and slapping on lbm quite well...

It sounds like a cool job. id probably be out of place tho, being a med student.(or am i just being prejudiced towards bouncers now)

 

[Warik]

i suppose you just need to be real big and be able to handle a situation... I`m 189.5 lbs now about 15% bf... but im only 16 and slapping on lbm quite well...

Not necessarily... I saw two bouncers at this club last week that didn't look a pound over 200. I suppose it all depends on the club. I wouldn't bother looking for a hulk bouncer if I ran a nice club, but I wouldn't open my doors unless I had the fucking HULK if I ran one of those ghetto clubs with all the little punk kids.

-Warik

 

[manny78]

what kind of things are required to be a bouncer? It sounds like a job id like to work while in uni.

i suppose you just need to be real big and be able to handle a situation... I`m 189.5 lbs now about 15% bf... but im only 16 and slapping on lbm quite well...

It sounds like a cool job. id probably be out of place tho, being a med student.(or am i just being prejudiced towards bouncers now)

well at least you need to be 18 or 21 depending on where you are. Then it's all about attitude. Somtimes by the way will stand people wont even try to start shit with you. Having technique (some kind of martial) will help a lot.

 

[casavant]

what kind of things are required to be a bouncer? It sounds like a job id like to work while in uni.

i suppose you just need to be real big and be able to handle a situation... I`m 189.5 lbs now about 15% bf... but im only 16 and slapping on lbm quite well...

It sounds like a cool job. id probably be out of place tho, being a med student.(or am i just being prejudiced towards bouncers now)

I bounce with a 5' 10", 225 lb math major who also is a D1 cheerleader for the ladies basketball team. Another is working on his masters. My full time job is here at the campus library. While some stereotypes are true some of the time, there are many exceptions.

Plenty of guys around your size work as bouncers, but I would recommend getting as fucking JACKED UP as you can. You'll get a lot more respect without having to get physical nearly as often, and when it does hit the fan, you'll be able to handle most guys like they were women.

 

[casavant]

For you PC folks out there-

...and no, I don't manhandle women (although I've had to pick them up and carry them out the door on several occasions).

 

[WODIN]

Hehe... WODIN would tear the place apart. That fart would use his cane if he had to. No one gets the better of WODIN.

-Warik

If the cane don't work I'll pop dem biatches with my walker!!!

 

[Robert Jan]

i must add im 189.5 lbs 6"4... so thats is actually very scrawny

 

[casavant]

i must add im 189.5 lbs 6"4... so thats is actually very scrawny

Considering your age, your frame will surely fill out some more within the next couple of years. I started training hard when I was sixteen and weighed 185 at 6' 2.5". I've gained a ton of weight since then. Put some quality meat on ya and you'll be good to go.

 

[3Vandoo]

Weird weird weird

There a lad from my m-regiment who work had a bouncer, and he getting trialed because he kicked the ass of a few assholes down at Pub Corn, in Charlesbourg.

 

[jc21]

great post...i feel you on everything.

i work the door and check id's and get paid to take the fake ones, so when you walk in with a shaved head and 30 pounds of fat on you ...and the id you have long hair and you are skinny give me a sec to look at it.

i have cops that i work with every weekend...and have decked many dudes. of course i always coax them into hitting or swinging at me first. then they go to the hosipital to get fixed up and to jail

i think it is hilarious how drunk people just look at your height..i am 5'7 and have jacked up many dudes in the mid 6' range. i used to have a bunch of juice heads working with me but they all quit so now i just have the juice head bar back..

 

[Mike P.T.]

Ahhhh the old days.... Shit I need to go to sleep im drunk... Drinking while on cycle... bad.

 

[casavant]

i work the door and check id's and get paid to take the fake ones, so when you walk in with a shaved head and 30 pounds of fat on you ...and the id you have long hair and you are skinny give me a sec to look at it.

Yeah, the height on the ID will be 5'6" or something, and they'll be close to six feet. What I find amazing is how many don't take the time to memorize every single fact on their fake- b-day, address, DL#, etc. When I think an ID is phony or not them, the first question I ask is what they're birthday is, and it's amazing how many will not know. I love it when they try to play it off by answering, "It says so right there."

I say, "I know what THIS says your birthday is, now YOU tell me." At the bar I work at, I usually am a nice guy and just give it back and tell them to go try somewhere else. But I've worked other places where I would pull them. Do you ever have someone try to yank it back out of your hand? BIG mistake.

 

[velvett]

6' 3" 278

Current Stats.

Chest 57 "
Neck 20"
Arms 21.5"
Quads 32"
Waist 38"

Come again?

why thank you , that would be lovely...

 

[jc21]

Do you ever have someone try to yank it back out of your hand? BIG mistake.

not usually since i have cops standing right behind me..but they have...i just laugh at them. i actually get paid $10 a peice for them. but you know i will be a nice guy and sell it back for $40.

 

[The Ranger]

I tell them straight up at the club..." You fake it....we take it... " If you come here dressing like a thug, acting like a thug, I treat ya like a thug.....

Dress to Impress, have a good time, and chill.....as bouncers, we work for 1%....99% of the people come in to have a good time, 1% wants to start shit....you have to decide when you walk through the door, am I in the 99% crowd tonight, or the 1% crowd tonight....Usually it makes no difference to the bouncers, the pay is the same...whether we crack skulls or not...

Ranger

 

[scott825]

Yes people have snatced IDs out of my hands before & most of the time its girls who do that.I usually dont take them anymore cause our new manager wont give us any $ for them so I just tell them to carry their ASS to the college bars or something.

Ranger what kind of place do you bounce at?

 

[The Ranger]

Heh heh heh....Depends on the night Scott,

Wed. Night is pure Latino night....Usually pretty cool, drunk Mexicans generally having a good time
Thursday Night is Ladies night...Packed and you're on your toes all night with drunks and trouble makers
Friday night is contest night....wet tee shirt, tiny bikini...etc. College kids telling me who their daddy is and so forth
Sat. Night is uaually the best night, 10$ cover weeds out a few chuckle heads and probally the best crowd...

The good money is in the festival, or concert scene....a good festoival(3 days) nets me around 1,500$ for the weekend, plus expenses.....

Ranger

 

[scott825]

really !!I'll be sending you a e-mail sometime this weekend Bro!