Dumper try, #2.

[NoDaddyNo]

1) astroglide
2) ky
3) chloroform
4) icy hot

smear all of that over your own face and then drop a fire extinguisher on your nuts.

 

[beastboy]

And it left the wife in tears again. What is the secret?

I'm not sure if I will get a shot at #3......please list up some advice. Have to get back to training and will check back later. (Not pooper training, either....electrical).

 

[NoDaddyNo]

The girl has to be really drunk, and someone you don't know that can't pick your face out of a lineup. Ideally some drunk college girl, lost and staggering down some dark side street.

fist can be a verb

 

[WODIN]

Look some girls love it, Some hate it and it hurts. Just hang it up and be happy that you have pennpacker.

 

[PoyeBoy]

lol,

I think the more important part is; Did you finish?; and Do you have pictures?

 

[onerepmaximum]

Have her put her knees to her chest and when you start to go in have her push like she is taking a dump. (hopefully she doesn't have to shit) By her pushing like that, it helps open things up so you're not pushing as much against "the grain" if you know what I mean.

 

[Ffactor]

Try using some lube, then go down on her. While you give her oral just rest your middle finger on her anus. As she relaxes she will pull you in. Make sure there is enough lube and take your time. 30-45 minutes before attempting anal. When you pull your finger out make sure you do it SLOWLY. You might be too much of a dillhole to actually pull this off. I would recommend giving up. Maybe she can put on a strapon and do you instead.

 

[jerkbox]

try a donkey punch

 

[NoDaddyNo]

Okay, fucking fine, I will spell it out for you.

1) get the bitch naked
2) bend her over, face down into a pillow
3) spit on her ass and then slam your cock on there as hard and as fast as you can
4) lean all of your weight on her
5) punch her in the back of the head as hard as you can with a closed fist

just keep repeating numbers 4 and 5 while jackhammering away until you explode all over her back.
then roll her over and call her a slut and wipe your dick over her eyes, nose, and mouth.

they don't call me the Latin lover for nothing.

 

[WODIN]

I would recommend giving up. Maybe she can put on a strapon and do you instead.

I'd pay real money to see that.

 

[Dougly]

it's overrated anyway.

 

[nvrbuffenuff_girl]

And it left the wife in tears again. What is the secret?

Read this.

 

[the nature boy]

put a gun to your head and tell her you'll shoot yourself if she doesn't let you try again. If she says yes, you'll get try #3 and you win. If she says no to attempt #3, you shoot yourself in the head and everyone on EF wins.

it's a win/win situation.

 

[beastboy]

I used lube and anal ease. Maybe a pic of my cock would help.

Oh..she was drunk too.

And on her belly.

 

[Y_lifter]

Doing anything that makes your woman cry from displeasure
is not conducive to a long happy relationship..

I can't even get try #1, so be happy with what you sorta got..

 

[NoDaddyNo]

I used lube and anal ease. Maybe a pic of my cock would help.

Oh..she was drunk too.

And on her belly.

maybe it was the angle. if she was just on her belly, that isn't the best angle - need the knees up to her chest (her knees).

think of the angle that would allow a dump to come out easily, and then use that angle and slam your peter up in it.

 

[Bullit]

Tell him to relax.
And call him a pussy for crying.

 

[HG Pennypacker]

Okay, fucking fine, I will spell it out for you.

1) get the bitch naked
2) bend her over, face down into a pillow
3) spit on her ass and then slam your cock on there as hard and as fast as you can
4) lean all of your weight on her
5) punch her in the back of the head as hard as you can with a closed fist

just keep repeating numbers 4 and 5 while jackhammering away until you explode all over her back.
then roll her over and call her a slut and wipe your dick over her eyes, nose, and mouth.

they don't call me the Latin lover for nothing.

Dickhead. I just spit out my Diet A&W Rootbeer all over my desk.

 

[HG Pennypacker]

Ummmm.....best thread ever.

 

[beastboy]

maybe it was the angle. if she was just on her belly, that isn't the best angle - need the knees up to her chest (her knees).

think of the angle that would allow a dump to come out easily, and then use that angle and slam your peter up in it.

The angle of my dangle was just fine.