do people ever 'grow up'

[Lao Tzu]

Do people ever grow up or are they just bigger, more mature versions of children? Seems like there is no 'grown up' stage where you just stagnate as an adult, there are just a new set of challenges, goals and discontentment. I always love it when i hear a 40 year old talk about 'what he wants to do with his life'.

 

[hamstershaver]

yes i stopped watching cartoons

 

[Lestat]

Some people never really grow up.

Personally, I'm a grown up, but I feel like a kid.. and like to play like one sometimes.

But I also am a professional, and can carry on a conversation with just about anyone.

 

[EnderJE]

No. People never "grow up". Life is a constant working towards something, getting something, realizing that its crap and deciding on something else, working towards something...

 

[Fonz]

They have to.

With advancing age comes more responsibilities. College, University, job etc...

And then if you have a family...even more reponsibilities.

You have to grow up/mature or else you'll never really achieve anything worth achieving in life.

Fonz

 

[Lao Tzu]

No. People never "grow up". Life is a constant working towards something, getting something, realizing that its crap and deciding on something else, working towards something...

thats what i was thinking. when i was a kid i assumed being 'grown up' meant being set in your life. You were a reliable vessel who had found his place on earth. But now i realize its much like being a kid, just different challenges, different stresses, different setbacks. only real difference is money and some maturity.

 

[Lao Tzu]

You have to grow up/mature or else you'll never really achieve anything worth achieving in life.

Fonz

yeah good points, but i dont consider 'growing up' and 'maturing' to be the same thing. True you must mature but growing up has always implied to me some kind of low key nirvana, like you had found your niche. But i realize now growing up just means being bigger, with money, and having different types of problems/setbacks/stresses. Grown ups have insecurities, hate their lives, and feel confused about things the same way kids did. It may sound stupid to say this but this is finally starting to don on me.

 

[big4life]

I don't think that you ever quit growing emotionally, at least I would hope not. With every new experience you grow in some way. Maturity level is something else entirely.

 

[Fonz]

yeah good points, but i dont consider 'growing up' and 'maturing' to be the same thing. True you must mature but growing up has always implied to me some kind of low key nirvana, like you had found your niche. But i realize now growing up just means being bigger, with money, and having different types of problems/setbacks/stresses. Grown ups have insecurities, hate their lives, and feel confused about things the same way kids did. It may sound stupid to say this but this is finally starting to don on me.

The European version of maturing is a bit different than the american.

It means becoming more of a gentleman, more cultured, more refined, and better able to command the respect of his peers.
Money is just the means to an end. The ultimate goal of any person should be the respect of his peers.

We are just take life a little slower in Europe so we make fewer life mistakes.

Fonz

 

[big_bad_buff]

I’ve realized this since I was about 18. When I was younger I thought there was a transformation from kid to adult that occurs. Later on in life I found this to be false.

When ever you go into an interview or when you’re talking to your boss or parents, just think of them as a big kid and you'll laugh your ass off. Funny if you think about.

Do people ever grow up or are they just bigger, more mature versions of children? Seems like there is no 'grown up' stage where you just stagnate as an adult, there are just a new set of challenges, goals and discontentment. I always love it when i hear a 40 year old talk about 'what he wants to do with his life'.

 

[Lao Tzu]

Re: Re: do people ever 'grow up'

I’ve realized this since I was about 18. When I was younger I thought there was a transformation from kid to adult that occurs. Later on in life I found this to be false.

When ever you go into an interview or when you’re talking to your boss or parents, just think of them as a big kid and you'll laugh your ass off. Funny if you think about.

i guess i'm slow, im 24 and just starting to realize it. but i've always been slow with this kind of stuff. I always thought there was some major transformation too but there isn't, there is just moving from student to wage earner, and a few maturities along the way (parent, spouse, employee, political pundit, etc).

 

[gonelifting]

I`ve realised some people don`t grow up due to their experiences or lack of them. You need to go through certain situations to grow as a person and some people never do.

 

[Buddy_Christ]

'do people ever grow up?' is too loose of a question. depends in what terms you define 'growing up.'

i define growing up as knowing your responsibilities and handling them appropriately. you know how to face challenges in a mature, responsible manner and are capable of making important decesions that will effect you in the long run. you accept responsibility for your actions, right or wrong. you are wise enough to know that you don't know it all and aren't afraid to admit it. you know how to control yourself in almost every situation and don't resort to childish tantrums when you don't get your way or start a fight with everyone that disagrees with you.

there's more i could say, but that's pretty much what i define as being "grown up." if that's what we're basing as the definition of being grown up, then my mother, who is 47, is nowhere near being grown up. that is only one reason i do whatever i can to stay as far away from her as possible.

if growing up means that i can't sometimes have childish juvinile fun (that doesn't get anyone hurt or breaks the law) or just really have "silly" fun and toss all my cares away for a few hours or days or whatever is appropriate and act like i'm a teenager again (in a somewhat mature and law abiding mannter), and i've accepted that my life and career is set for good and i can't change it, then i don't want to grow up. being 40 and talking about what you want to do with your life doesn't mean that you havn't grown up, only realized that your life is far from over and you still have time to enjoy it. when i'm 40, i'm sure i'll be talking about what i want to do with my life. the way i'm looking at things, if i really want to go to law school, i won't be done until i'm probably 32 and i'll be early into my career at 40. also, my son will turn 18 when i'm 41, and by the time i'm 42 he'll either be off at college or just out of my house, it'll be like starting life over again too bad i'm only 26 and i've got 15 more years to go

 

[big_bad_buff]

very true

I`ve realised some people don`t grow up due to their experiences or lack of them. You need to go through certain situations to grow as a person and some people never do.

 

[Lao Tzu]

good posts overall. i grew up in a 'normal' household, where there was no divorce, the dad earned income and the mother was a homemmaker. i always thought this was normal until i read that only about 9% of households are like this. i guess im stuck in the past, thinking 'growing up' is just some stagnant phase that eventually leads to death.

 

[SoreArms]

I feel that compared to most of my peers and societies standards, I am very immature for my age, but that's the way I want to stay.

I am 27, I have no family and no plans of one, have a degree and just started my career as an engineer. Outside of work though, I still like listening to loud music, going to concerts, wearing my facial piercings, dressing like a coutner culture bum and giving the finger to the man and the system. Most of my friends are now married or in serious relationships, have kids and look at me like, god when is he going to grow up we were into that shit in high school. Well "I'd rather stay a child, if being an adult means being like them". This is me at the moment at least. My responsabilities have changed greatly, rent, bills, survival and learning about life with every kick in the ass it gives me, but that doesn't mean that I now have to become some preppy fascade that everybody else seems to want to be at a certain age.

Learning how to take care of yourself is part of growing up and I am learning that before I ever decide or have to take care of others.

I'll grow up my own way.

BTW
Does anybody else still feel like the same person they were in their teenage years?

 

[gonelifting]

When I was 20 I knew it all really. lol OF COURSE NOT! I thought the same thing at 25 then at 30. Now at 35 I`m at least smart enough to know I will never stop learning and growing.

I know it`s cliche but I really do learn something valuable every day (or 2, or 3 lol) I look back at stuff I did 15 years ago and say to myself "Why the hell did I do that?" I guess it`s just reflecting on the past and hopefully preparing for a better future.

 

[Lao Tzu]

When I was 20 I knew it all really. lol OF COURSE NOT! I thought the same thing at 25 then at 30. Now at 35 I`m at least smart enough to know I will never stop learning and growing.

I know it`s cliche but I really do learn something valuable every day (or 2, or 3 lol) I look back at stuff I did 15 years ago and say to myself "Why the hell did I do that?" I guess it`s just reflecting on the past and hopefully preparing for a better future.

you're 35, im 24 and its new to me to talk as an equal to someone your age. i've always been a slow learner when it came to social issues (ive always been fast in academics, but slow in social issue) so the idea of having a discussion with a 50 year old, as an example, and being his equal is totally new to me. Im just starting to realize growing up just means money and a few life experiences, not some low key, static nirvana & omnipotence as i grew up thinking growing up meant.

 

[gonelifting]

you're 35, im 24 and its new to me to talk as an equal to someone your age. i've always been a slow learner when it came to social issues (ive always been fast in academics, but slow in social issue) so the idea of having a discussion with a 50 year old, as an example, and being his equal is totally new to me. Im just starting to realize growing up just means money and a few life experiences, not some low key, static nirvana & omnipotence as i grew up thinking growing up meant.

Don`t get your hopes up bro. You`re talking to a High School graduate. Everyone here is either Going to college or graduated already with a JOB!!!

I hope I could still hang out here though.

 

[EnderJE]

so the idea of having a discussion with a 50 year old, as an example, and being his equal is totally new to me.

Like the other guy said, its all about experiences. If the 50 year old was new to training, he/she might ask you for advice.

 

[Bullit]

I certainly haven't.

 

[Mr. dB]

Do people ever grow up or are they just bigger, more mature versions of children? Seems like there is no 'grown up' stage where you just stagnate as an adult, there are just a new set of challenges, goals and discontentment. I always love it when i hear a 40 year old talk about 'what he wants to do with his life'.

My dad was grown up in his 20s. WWII will do that to ya', I guess...

I'm 47 and still think I'm an 11 year old.

 

[hanselthecaretaker]

I always procrastinate, but I think that everyone grows up differently, and I still act like a kid every once in a while. As long as it doesn't compromise your otherwise mature persona.

 

[boscoe wilson]

I think women grow up to an extent. I don't think men do, they just act that way to pick up chicks.

 

[coldblue1955]

well i'm a big kid at heart and proud of it too.