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satanic goatslayer
New member
I once met a fellow who disliked the shopping mall. In fact, he detested it so much that he got himself a tattoo of a mall being burned down on his back. I used to tease and stab him with fountain pens, but he was absolutely maniacal about shopping malls.
No wonder, really. I too have felt the pain of being in a huge crowd, waiting to buy a simple fucking piece of copper wire. Usually I'm wearing a discman, or portable 8-track, so I just pop in some Cameo and let my worries funk away.
But there's always a speed bump in the road of life, isn't there? In most cases it is generally a worthless cashier.
"Ring this up please"
"Oh, my cash register is broken"
"Ring this up"
"I'll have to ask a manager"
"Ring this up"
".................."
"Friends! How many of us have them????"
Confusion generally sets in about that time, so I normally run out of the store holding my goods in my teeth. Security guards always try to catch up, but angina being what it is, it's easy to duck behind a bench and wait for them.
"Where'd he go?"
Look around buckos. I'm behind you holding my copper wire between my fists.
"There he is!!!"
No shit. Wrap that wire around their necks and asphyxiate those slags. Watch as the air seeps from their lungs, their faces turn blue, and you hear that final gasp of uselessness.
Fuck, I too hate the mall.
No wonder, really. I too have felt the pain of being in a huge crowd, waiting to buy a simple fucking piece of copper wire. Usually I'm wearing a discman, or portable 8-track, so I just pop in some Cameo and let my worries funk away.
But there's always a speed bump in the road of life, isn't there? In most cases it is generally a worthless cashier.
"Ring this up please"
"Oh, my cash register is broken"
"Ring this up"
"I'll have to ask a manager"
"Ring this up"
".................."
"Friends! How many of us have them????"
Confusion generally sets in about that time, so I normally run out of the store holding my goods in my teeth. Security guards always try to catch up, but angina being what it is, it's easy to duck behind a bench and wait for them.
"Where'd he go?"
Look around buckos. I'm behind you holding my copper wire between my fists.
"There he is!!!"
No shit. Wrap that wire around their necks and asphyxiate those slags. Watch as the air seeps from their lungs, their faces turn blue, and you hear that final gasp of uselessness.
Fuck, I too hate the mall.
