child custody question

[biteme]

For anyone that may know. I have a 50/50 split custody of my daughter, although she stays with me about 70% of the time for the past few months. She doesn't like going to her mother and live-in boyfriend's house. I live in the state of Texas. I've searched the net but can't find any concrete information and attorneys are very guarded in any info they give out because they want money for everything. I have heard that the child can choose which parent they want to live with when they reach a certain age, what age is that in Texas? Do you have to have a trial which costs thousands of dollars? THe ex will not even come and get her and take her this weekend when my daughter has said that she will go. I have a bunch of studying to do and can't give her the proper attention. I watched her for like 17 days in a row when my ex's grandmother was on life support. Do you think she will reciprocate? Hell no. Another worthless bitch. Seems like most of them are these days.

 

[bwood]

i will check for ya bro in a little bit...

if spatts dont beat me to it...


p.s. mike 32 is a moron...

 

[Bikini Mod]

Sorry to hear about all your troubles, Biteme. I am still trying to fit into my head how this woman slept in the same bed with a man that she was not married to IN THE SAME ROOM (let alone under the same roof) with her child. Call me old-fashioned, but that just doesn't seem right. If it were me, I would have shared one bed with my girls and had the bf share a bed w/his child or he sleep alone on the floor.

Whatever you do, even though it might seem like a good idea at the time, DO NOT make your daughter choose and drag her through all kinds of legal bullshit. It will really hurt the child... that is, unless that is what SHE WANTS TO DO because she is left with no choice because her mother just won't yield and do the right thing.

It never ceases to amaze me when parents feel the need to fuck on the other by dragging their kids to court. I am not saying this about YOU... but rather your ex because from what you have said it sounds like she is the kind of person that will do that.

TRY REAL HARD NOT TO DO THE LEGAL ROUTE. It will be VERY DIFFICULT for you to get custody unless she is UNFIT. The fact that you may have her more than the ex isn't enough for a court to give you primary residential. Do you really want to spend all kinds of money to make some lawyer fatter and put your daughter through all kinds of shit just to find out?

TRY TO WORK IT OUT....

You seem like a good guy and your ex seems like her head is a bit far up her ass but TRY, for your daughter's sake.

 

[biteme]

Thanks yall. BM I'm not sure if you would have to have a custody battle once they reach the age where they can choose. Right now neither one of us has primary residence and she moved out of the court ordered area.

 

[Lao Tzu]

http://www.millenniumdivorce.com/articles/Texas.asp#Custody?

if the child is 14 years old or older, the preference of the child; and

so i guess the age is 14, like project said.

http://www.betterdivorce.com/statelaws/texas.shtml

heres more info

CHILD CUSTODY: Joint or sole managing conservatorship (custody) is determined according to the best interests of the child. The sex of the parents is not a factor for consideration. The wishes of the child may be considered. The factors to be considered in determining the terms and conditions for possession of a child by the possessory conservator (parent with visitation) are as follows: (1) the age, circumstances, needs, and best interests of the child; (2) the circumstances of the parents; (3) evidence of any spouse or child abuse; and (4) any other relevant factor. The factors specified in the statute for consideration in decisions regarding joint managing conservatorship are: (1) whether the physical, psychological, or emotional needs and development of the child will benefit; (2) the ability of the parents to give first priority to the welfare of the child and reach shared decisions in the child's best interests; (3) whether each parent can encourage and accept a positive relationship between the child and the other parent; (4) whether both parents participated in child rearing before the filing of the suit; (5) the geographical proximity of the homes of the parents; (6) if the child is 14 years old or older, the preference of the child; and (7) any other relevant factor. The court may not award joint managing conservatorship is there is any credible evidence of spousal or child abuse or neglect. Parents may file a written agreement with the court regarding joint managing conservatorship. The court will award joint managing conservatorship based on an agreement between the parents if the agreement: (1) establishes the county of residence of the child; (2) states the rights and duties of each parent regarding the child's present and future care, support, and education; (3) includes provisions to minimize disruption of the child's schooling, daily routine, and association with friends; (4) was entered into voluntarily and knowingly; and (5) is in the best interests of the child. In addition, there are standard terms for a court's order on a child's conservatorship set out in the statute that are presumed to be the minimum allowable time that the parent who is not awarded the primary physical residence of the child is to have the child. [Texas Codes Annotated; Family Code, Chapters 5-153.004 to 153.434].

Heres the texas code

http://www.capitol.state.tx.us/statutes/statutes.html

 

[Lao Tzu]

Project, spatts, happyscrappy. You're probably all the same person anyway.

 

[bwood]

biteme...

is she(ex) still in texas???

i need to know...

 

[biteme]

biteme...

is she(ex) still in texas???

i need to know...

Yes. She moved out of town about 20 miles away. On her days which are few now, she brings her into town and drops her off at school. I pick her up every day which saves her a ton in childcare.

 

[biteme]

Thanks Nord.

 

[bwood]

biteme...

it looks like the court can force mediation(c)...

but cannot force it to be binding without both your and her consent...(d)(2)

end result...court and attornies fees...if she wants to fight you...

tx case law states that you do not need the court if you both agree to go to arbitration and both agree to it being binding;
subject to reasonableness of course...

i do not know the actual mechanism for this, contact your local family court clerk...the more polite you are, the more help you will get...

truthfully, i recommend a shovel and an alibi...


Tex. Fam. Code

§ 153.0071. Alternate Dispute Resolution Procedures


(a) On written agreement of the parties, the court may refer a suit affecting the parent-child relationship to arbitration. The agreement must state whether the arbitration is binding or non-binding.

(b) If the parties agree to binding arbitration, the court shall render an order reflecting the arbitrator's award unless the court determines at a non-jury hearing that the award is not in the best interest of the child. The burden of proof at a hearing under this subsection is on the party seeking to avoid rendition of an order based on the arbitrator's award.

(c) On the written agreement of the parties or on the court's own motion, the court may refer a suit affecting the parent-child relationship to mediation.

(d) A mediated settlement agreement is binding on the parties if the agreement:

(1) provides, in a prominently displayed statement that is in boldfaced type or capital letters or underlined, that the agreement is not subject to revocation;

(2) is signed by each party to the agreement; and

(3) is signed by the party's attorney, if any, who is present at the time the agreement is signed.

(e) If a mediated settlement agreement meets the requirements of Subsection (d), a party is entitled to judgment on the mediated settlement agreement notwithstanding Rule 11, Texas Rules of Civil Procedure, or another rule of law.

(f) A party may at any time prior to the final mediation order file a written objection to the referral of a suit affecting the parent-child relationship to mediation on the basis of family violence having been committed by another party against the objecting party or a child who is the subject of the suit. After an objection is filed, the suit may not be referred to mediation unless, on the request of a party, a hearing is held and the court finds that a preponderance of the evidence does not support the objection. If the suit is referred to mediation, the court shall order appropriate measures be taken to ensure the physical and emotional safety of the party who filed the objection. The order shall provide that the parties not be required to have face-to-face contact and that the parties be placed in separate rooms during mediation. This subsection does not apply to suits filed under Chapter 262.

 

[biteme]

biteme...

it looks like the court can force mediation(c)...

but cannot force it to be binding without both your and her consent...(d)(2)

end result...court and attornies fees...if she wants to fight you...

tx case law states that you do not need the court if you both agree to go to arbitration and both agree to it being binding;
subject to reasonableness of course...

i do not know the actual mechanism for this, contact your local family court clerk...the more polite you are, the more help you will get...

truthfully, i recommend a shovel and an alibi...


Tex. Fam. Code

§ 153.0071. Alternate Dispute Resolution Procedures


(a) On written agreement of the parties, the court may refer a suit affecting the parent-child relationship to arbitration. The agreement must state whether the arbitration is binding or non-binding.

(b) If the parties agree to binding arbitration, the court shall render an order reflecting the arbitrator's award unless the court determines at a non-jury hearing that the award is not in the best interest of the child. The burden of proof at a hearing under this subsection is on the party seeking to avoid rendition of an order based on the arbitrator's award.

(c) On the written agreement of the parties or on the court's own motion, the court may refer a suit affecting the parent-child relationship to mediation.

(d) A mediated settlement agreement is binding on the parties if the agreement:

(1) provides, in a prominently displayed statement that is in boldfaced type or capital letters or underlined, that the agreement is not subject to revocation;

(2) is signed by each party to the agreement; and

(3) is signed by the party's attorney, if any, who is present at the time the agreement is signed.

(e) If a mediated settlement agreement meets the requirements of Subsection (d), a party is entitled to judgment on the mediated settlement agreement notwithstanding Rule 11, Texas Rules of Civil Procedure, or another rule of law.

Thanks a lot man! The shovel's not a bad idea.

(f) A party may at any time prior to the final mediation order file a written objection to the referral of a suit affecting the parent-child relationship to mediation on the basis of family violence having been committed by another party against the objecting party or a child who is the subject of the suit. After an objection is filed, the suit may not be referred to mediation unless, on the request of a party, a hearing is held and the court finds that a preponderance of the evidence does not support the objection. If the suit is referred to mediation, the court shall order appropriate measures be taken to ensure the physical and emotional safety of the party who filed the objection. The order shall provide that the parties not be required to have face-to-face contact and that the parties be placed in separate rooms during mediation. This subsection does not apply to suits filed under Chapter 262.

 

[Bikini Mod]

I sincerely hope that your ex will not be a cunt about things and do what is best for your daughter.... There are so many time when I just don't understand when A PARENT can't put their feelings aside to do what is best for the child. These are sometimes the most painful decisions that a parent has to make, but they are NOT difficult.